The scandal deepens….

Last week we did actresses. Ladies first. This time it’s guys’ turn.

Worst performance by an actor?

My pick is a little rough, because he’s recently deceased, but I gotta say it: Ray Dennis Steckler, aka Cash Flagg in “The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zombies.” Whatever his merits as a director (and we’ll discuss that next week) as an actor he makes Hal Warren in “Manos” look like Lawrence Olivier.

What’s your pick?

An open thread for reports about the Cinematic Titanic shows in Cleveland this weekend.

Download it here. Free sample here.

The current Cinematic Titanic tour heads to Cleveland next, and the advance press has begun.

First shown: 8/27/94
Opening: Tom’s planetarium show is disrupted
Intro: Swing choir competition
Host segment 1: Shop class isn’t going well
Host segment 2: Crow puts himself in a “double jock lock”
Host segment 3: Tom bombs Crow
End: Crow and Tom struggle in their parachutes, letter, Frank dodges ball
Stinger: “I don’t know. I feel real free up there in the high blue sky.”
(126 votes, average: 4.6 out of 5)
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• Can you tell, yet, that I really love the episodes when the movie is really, really, really bad? I love this episode.
• Of course, we now begin our descent into the works of one Coleman Francis. As Daddy-O writes: “…those wondering how he got the idea he could direct probably need look no further than the extensive list of bit parts he played in Hollywood over three decades. One begins to imagine Coleman, having spent so much time on movie sets, beginning to think he could do it himself. How wrong he was.”
• That said, this movie, I have to say, is probably the best of Coleman Francis’ oeuvre, which isn’t saying much, but still. You almost get caught up in it. Not quite, but almost. Plus you’ve got a classic short and, as for the host segments, well, in the words of Dr. F., it does my heart good to see Crow mangled beyond all recognition. All in all, a winner in my book.
• This one has an entry in the annotated guide, so enjoy the obscure references.
• The Servo in the opening is the one they use in theater (or one like it), just as Timmy the Dark Crow was the Crow they use in the theater. When they paint ‘em black they make better silhouttes.
• The swing choir sketch is pure, unadulterated genius (topped by Dr. F’s hilarious — and slightly nauseating — victory dance). I had never heard of “swing choir” growing up but I get the gist. Maybe it was (is?) a Midwest thing? Our choirs were more of the “stand stock still in a robe” variety.
• The achingly funny short was shown at the Museum of TV event in Los Angeles in ‘95? I think mentioned in a previous entry that it was really an epiphany for me, since I had never watched MST3K on a big screen with such a large group before. The crowd was just roaring with almost deafening gales of laughter. I’d seldom been in a crowd of people all laughing so hard and loud before. It really was an eye-opener.
• Tom Servo is quite correct about the “I can’t pay you but I can put your name in the credits cast list.” Word is that is exactly what it was.
• Kudos to Jef Maynard for the sawn-in-half Crow. Another great creation.
• My theory on they “why” of this movie is that Coleman guessed that sport skydiving was so novel and exciting to watch in and of itself that it would captivate America, and they wouldn’t notice the almost total lack of talent of the entire cast and crew.
• The ditty “sex for sundries is fun” was an immediate hit among internet MSTies.
• In addition to swing choir, I had never heard of a double jock lock. Apparently none of the bullies in my junior high school had heard of it either, thank goodness!
• I like coffee. It became an immediate catchphrase.
• Callbacks: “Manos!” “No Lupita!” (from Santa Claus)
• But beyond all the other internet MSTie sensations that this episode created, far and away the hugest was Petey Plane. For a few days there, it was almost all anybody could talk about in the forums.
• I’m pretty sure Tom’s dialog in segment 3 (”splash one!”) echoes video of a laser-guided missile strike that was being shown on TV a lot at the time, but I can’t seem to find a reference to the exact instance on the Web.
• Jimmy Bryant may have been the only moderately talented person in the entire movie. His stuff is actually kinda good!
• Fave riff: George Herman Ruth on guitar!

In conjunction with their shows in Seattle March 13-14, the cast of Cinematic Titanic will make a personal appearance at Scarecrow Video Thursday, March 12th, at 7:30 pm. Scarecrow Video is at 5030 Roosevelt Way NE.

Buy it here. Free sample here.

With the Oscars this weekend, I thought we’d follow up on the recent “worst movie” discussion with some “worst performance” picks.

This week: Worst performance by an actress in a leading role.

My nomination: Kathrine Victor, star of “Wild Wild World of Batwoman.” Clunky and unconvincing from start to finish.

Who’s your pick?

An open thread for reports from the Cinematic Titanic shows in Boston this weekend.