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Weekend Discussion Thread: MST3K-Inspired Meals

Alert reader Charles suggests:

How about a weekend topic of mst3k sourced meals/banquets. You could start with an appetizer of some of Trumpy’s favorite peanuts. Then a hamburger sammich prepared by the cook in “I Accuse My Parents” within a side of fresh carrots from the Truck Farmer short. Wash it down with some canned Wassail (please check the
freshness date). Finally, perhaps you have a craving for some CARNATION ICE CREAM.

Okay MSTie-foodies, have at it.

(Keep those topic suggestions coming!)

73 Replies to “Weekend Discussion Thread: MST3K-Inspired Meals”

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  1. XZB says:

    I prefer a nice stew, made from corn, chilies, green peppers….*sigh* onions…..

       27 likes

  2. Gary Bowden says:

    Rowsdower Beer..It’s like tasting the sun!

       11 likes

  3. I’d invite my friends and family over for a smorgasbord of KLACK products.

    Leather Pancakes with Dicey Cocoa Stumps.
    Creamy Clotted Palm spread on Horsey Biscuits.
    Sir Cheddar Snack-A-Lots.
    Salamander Fingerwiches.
    Creamy Crust Puppies.
    Taco Mince Meat Relish Parfait served in a Tulip Glass.
    Skin Mittens with Gamey Forced Meat Stuffing.
    Polynesian Cheese Devils.
    KLACK Hanger-Crafted Cobra Coils.
    Cooter Cakes with incredible, edible Phlegm.
    Festive KLACK-Wrapped Kitty Centerpiece.
    Gut Loaf Whistle Pie.
    Gold Roasted Mutant Hell-Beast stuffed with Flesh-Button Dressing, Saladoos, Cooter Croutons and Grandmother Earlobes.
    Chode Balls.
    Mugs of Holiday Swill.

    I don’t think they’ll be my friends and family very long.

       8 likes

  4. GizmonicTemp says:

    For breakfast, some Joe Don Baker Damn Donuts from “Final Justice”.

    For lunch, something light. How about a Sampo Space Sandwich? The bread is made from flour and salt from the Sampo and the meat is some of Crow’s mystery meatloaf from “Deadly Mantis”.

    For dinner, Roasted Duck. No, not just any duck; the HUGE one from “Village of the Giants”. Oh, and this is being served at Nastya and Ivan’s wedding party where we eat wedding cake and party the night away!

       4 likes

  5. David Mello says:

    How about some Dancin’ Soup from The Wild Wild Restaurant from Batwoman. One bowl, and it’s a rave party in no time.
    Or Coleman Francis Coffee, where it’s the worst part of wakin’ up.

       6 likes

  6. Jay says:

    Torgo’s Pizza!!

    Complete with beverage and really, really crazy bread. Don’t forget to tip the driver, especially if you are a brunette mom type.

       8 likes

  7. Kansas says:

    Come to John Agar’s Place, where the gillman will serve you a variety of fish. Make sure to give him a good tip or he might throw you against a tree. You can also order the Mole People Special of goat stew and mushrooms. Don’t send any of the food back or Agar might shock you with a cattle prod.

       3 likes

  8. trickymutha says:

    Waffles.

       17 likes

  9. robot rump! says:

    i’d invite Gamera over and whammo! a ready to eat buffet in it’s own serving dish! he is full of meat after all. maybe as an appetizer some frog legs from ‘Cliff Weismeyer’s’ hoppin’ little joint from RZC.

       4 likes

  10. GizmonicTemp says:

    David MelloColeman Francis Coffee, where it’s the worst part of wakin’ up.

    Very nicely done, except now I have that jingle in my head with your lyrics!

       4 likes

  11. Grumpy says:

    Have a cup of coffee with the gang from Red Zone Cuba. Great with beans, to have when you’re throwing an old man down a well, or dining with Mrs. Jastin and her simmered sauce. Don’t forget the Tiramisu for dessert.

       4 likes

  12. Ro-man says:

    SPACOM on Hamdingers.

       3 likes

  13. Mark Honhorst says:

    French fried potatoes, anyone?

       7 likes

  14. Ro-man says:

    You can start off with a nice steaming bowl of California Cornucopia Vegetable Jubilee soup.

       1 likes

  15. servomademesayit says:

    Cave Dweller Steak Tartare served by invisible waiters sounds good.

       5 likes

  16. Murdock Hauser says:

    Try the Merlin Chop. Half a pound of Merlin served with steak fries, vegetable of the day and a quick dessert.

       9 likes

  17. Green Switch says:

    Any bowl of soup would have to be served with Incredible Melting Crackers, or you’ll never hear the end of it from Doctor Ted Nelson.

       6 likes

  18. EricJ says:

    Finally, perhaps you have a craving for some CARNATION ICE CREAM

    “Dish of ice cream”?–Don’t tempt me!

       5 likes

  19. Zor Prime says:

    Can’t I just pound Budweisers like the guy from Devil Fish?

    Wait, that would mean I’d be drinking Budweiser. Never mind.

    Maybe just some popcorn instead.

       6 likes

  20. Kenneth Morgan says:

    For a quick and easy snack, there’s strawberry cereal cubes, plus dehydrated soup and chicken. Just like the astronauts eat!

    And top it off with “quiet pills”, just like the astronauts eat (when they’re trying not to die of suffocation)!

       3 likes

  21. Sitting Duck says:

    I’ll go for some tacos at Eat (from Girl in Gold Boots), deep fried and slathered in SPACOM with a bottle of cider I hope is suppose to have peanuts. Then probably chase it with a bottle or two of antacid.

       6 likes

  22. ck says:

    For good eatin’ drop by Al Frazier’s Restaurant. No need to bring a gun if you’re broke. Al will give you credit (he never loses by doing so ?????????????????). Have a nice hamburger sammich with potato garnish. Repay him by working at a nearby truck farm and bring him discarded carrots, lettuce, etc. Or have relatives visiting a farm for the summer smuggle some of Farmer Jim’s yummy ham dinners (but make sure they don’t talk during Jim’s fundamentalist preaching during dinner). No time for a sitdown meal? Then pick up a hamburger sammich and it’s pedal to the metal to beat Monty to Messina.

    Soup and dessert? No problem. Have Mitchell entertain by peeling oranges and doing his hilarious party trick of popping open sixpacks with his toes (always a hit with the ladies). But arrive early to get some of the butler’s famous, if limited in quantity) soup (said to be the inspiration for the Soup Nazi’s creations).

       5 likes

  23. Saherrin says:

    Potatoes – lots and lots of potatoes.
    The Max Keller dinner bonanza (two halibuts, two baked potatoes, two beers, two apple pies with ice cream and a pot of coffee.)

    Turtle soup since Gamera is full of meat

       12 likes

  24. rose from nj says:

    Since I just watched Hamlet this week (I’m in the minority who like this film), I can only think of Dane Kabobs.

       5 likes

  25. robot rump! says:

    on a ‘Zigra’ motif, i’d have myself an all i can eat fish fry. fish as far as the eye can see all for me (so don’t give me some wacky story about your hotel being full of soldiers and Shamu and the Canadian seals can all go to hell!)
    continuing on, the plates full of fish would be served by a lovely young Japanese woman in a disturbingly short red skirt. the only pause on my feast occurs when a frantic young Japanese woman, who happened to have her bikini stolen while hyp-mo-tized, calls me up asking for a ride. i run out quickly and……um……i..need to go sit down over there for a moment.

       2 likes

  26. Stoneman says:

    Ham. I Love It!

       4 likes

  27. Gobi says:

    I like coffee.

       6 likes

  28. Dan says:

    Question: Would the soup be a biped?

       4 likes

  29. Weepy Donuts says:

    Everybody is coming up with great suggestions, while I’m just sitting here getting fat on Flavo-Fibes!

       17 likes

  30. EricJ says:

    Kenneth Morgan:
    For a quick and easy snack, there’s strawberry cereal cubes, plus dehydrated soup and chicken. Just like the astronauts eat!
    And top it off with “quiet pills”, just like the astronauts eat (when they’re trying not to die of suffocation)!

    Or even Martian chocolate-ice-cream pills!

    (Although I prefer the CT version:
    Santa: “You know, I’ll bet when a Martian gets a headache, he doesn’t take aspirin, he takes chocolate ice cream!”
    Mary Jo: “…And then gets an ice-cream headache, which pretty much defeats the purpose.”)

       7 likes

  31. MSTie says:

    I’m feeling lazy so I think I’ll just head down to the pub. “Ah, the pub — warm beer, boiled meat, and old guys.” — The Deadly Bees

       6 likes

  32. Stupid Repulsive Anteater says:

    I trust Ortega and whatever he decides to make.

       4 likes

  33. AlbuquerqueTurkey says:

    @7:
    The Mole People – they’re the ones that make that nice Mexican sauce…

       8 likes

  34. Mibbitmaker says:

    A snack for between any of these meals? Try MSTM&Ms – they incredibly melt in your mouth, not in your hands of fate.

       5 likes

  35. Thom Sirveaux says:

    Potatoes are what we eat!

       13 likes

  36. ready4sumfootball says:

    I don’t have a full meal in mind or anything, but I’ll take this as a good opportunity to ask an honest question I’ve wondered about for a while now. How many people after having just watched Squirm have thought about trying an egg cream? Have you actually tried it, and was it worth it? I can’t help but imagine it must taste pretty watered down.

       3 likes

  37. Ro-man says:

    Dan:
    Question: Would the soup be a biped?

    Oh no, no, no!!!! Oh, my heavens! …. No! No! Oh my dear heavens, no, no, no, no, no, no, no… (&c &c &c for six pages.)

       1 likes

  38. Cornjob says:

    For a different sort of meal start out by eating cubes of mescaline jello.

       2 likes

  39. Dr. Leonard "Bones" McCoy says:

    I am on a diet and don’t appreciate the not so subtle peer pressure mental sabotage going on here.

    Hand me that wall poster of a giant hamburger.

    Looks like zero calories to me, yet full of fiber.

       4 likes

  40. Ro-man says:

    Gamera vs. Guiron themed menu:

    Turtle soup (of course)
    Cornjob corndogs
    Brains
    Lightly grilled chunks of Gyaos sliced masterfully by Hibachi chef Guiron’s … er… nose?
    Two “hot dishes” wrapped in tin foil ;-)

       3 likes

  41. robot rump! says:

    Ro-man:
    Gamera vs. Guiron themed menu:

    Turtle soup (of course)
    Cornjob corndogs
    Brains
    Lightly grilled chunks of Gyaos sliced masterfully by Hibachi chef Guiron’s … er… nose?
    Two “hot dishes” wrapped in tin foil

    what about mother’s donuts!?!

       3 likes

  42. losingmydignity says:

    It’s funny you should ask. Right now I have a soccer squad on the grill.

       1 likes

  43. Thom Sirveaux says:

    Waffles. Oh no we got movie sign!

       2 likes

  44. ServoTron3000 says:

    The continental breakfast served to the Moon Man taken prisoner in Radar Men from the Moon (I can’t believe we’re trying to annilalate you. This is delicious!)

       1 likes

  45. I’d attend the daytime dance party in The Creeping Terror. Nice spread, including some abandoned cocktails to down surreptitiously, perhaps a slice of slow moving monster pie afterward, assuming I don’t oblige and crawl straight into his “mouth.” Then it’s off to dance with the wild bun shaker in the gold lame pants. A full evening, um, day, then off to bed. Got to get up early and help them search for the lost boys in Beast of Yucca Flats. Randy?! Art?! Just practicing.

       1 likes

  46. Droppo says:

    Saherrin:
    Potatoes – lots and lots of potatoes.
    The Max Keller dinner bonanza (two halibuts, two baked potatoes, two beers, two apple pies with ice cream and a pot of coffee.)

    Turtle soup since Gamera is full of meat

    Go Tim! Order, buddy!

       3 likes

  47. Heather_is_Pisces1999 says:

    Dr. Leonard “Bones” McCoy: Dr. Leonard “Bones” McCoy says:
    September 19, 2015 at 6:31 pm

    I am on a diet and don’t appreciate the not so subtle peer pressure mental sabotage going on here.

    Hand me that wall poster of a giant hamburger.

    Looks like zero calories to me, yet full of fiber.

    Dr.McCoy,

    I don’t understand your hamburger wall poster reference. Is that from a mSt3k skit or what? (I guess you could just be acting silly there.)

       0 likes

  48. Mr. B(ob) says:

    Chili peppers which burn my gut (they don’t really) and of course, the nice hamburger and some French fried potatoes.

       2 likes

  49. Dan Cole says:

    ready4sumfootball:
    “I don’t have a full meal in mind or anything, but I’ll take this as a good opportunity to ask an honest question I’ve wondered about for a while now. How many people after having just watched Squirm have thought about trying an egg cream? Have you actually tried it, and was it worth it? I can’t help but imagine it must taste pretty watered down.”

    As a matter of fact I did just that thing. I had heard of egg creams before, but it was MST’s screening of SQUIRM that inspired me to look up a traditional recipe on the interwebs thingy.
    As you can guess, I was rather disappointed to find out that the classic egg cream does not include a carnivorous worm.
    However, I pressed on & acquired some milk (as my fridge does not have teats {TEATS!], I purchased some from a local market), seltzer water…

    Let me pause hear to explain that I made it a point to by a bottle labeled SELTZER & not CLUB SODA. It became very clear to me, in my research, that, if I didn’t use SELTZER, a large gentleman from Brooklyn named Bruno or Tony the Chin or even Bugsy Adelman could legally enter my house & hurt me.

    Moving on…

    And finally chocolate syrup. Now, traditionally, the accepted syrup for a genuine egg cream is FOX’S U-BET chocolate syrup or, in a pinch, BOSCO. If you really want to be hardcore, get the Kosher version of FOX’S U-Bet (made with refined sugar, not corn syrup).

    As a foreigner (I was born in Wisconsin & live in LA) I had to settle for HERSHEY’S SYRUP. Bruno & Bugsy did enter my home at that point, but, as they saw I was doing my best (what with the SELTZER & all) they only broke one of my kneecaps & bid me adieu (real nice guys, actually. That Bruno was a hoot!)

    So, I proceeded to put 4 tablespoons of the syrup into a chilled pint glass (at that point a guy named P.J. O’Brien stuck his head in the door, but decided it wasn’t worth the trouble) followed by a quarter cup of milk. Then, stirring vigorously with a long spoon, I filled the rest of the glass with sod…damn!… I mean SELTZER.

    And you know what? It was an incredibly refreshing drink!

    You’re right that it is a little watery, but I think that’s the point. It’s something you might drink on a hot day when a shake or malted is too heavy, but you’re still in the mood for something chocolatey. The fizz from the seltzer kind of makes up for lack of sweetness.

    So take the plunge. If you want it a little richer some recipes recommend half-&-half instead of milk. This may draw Tony the Chin or one of the other guys to your door but just tell ’em Dan sent you & they’ll probably only break one of your thumbs.

       8 likes

  50. TurkeyVolumeGuessingGal says:

    A nice weenie roast with the Space Children

       3 likes

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