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Weekend Discussion Thread: What Movies Should the Reboot Riff?Well, what a week it’s been!
The news we got this week is causing all sorts of speculation…so let’s do some more! What movie(s) do you think would be good fodder for the new MST3K? Obviously they won’t be doing big blockbusters, so keep in mind that the movies will be a lot like the ones they did on the old show. Have at it! 203 Replies to “Weekend Discussion Thread: What Movies Should the Reboot Riff?”Commenting at Satellite News
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Star Crystal? (looks up on IMDB)
Ohhh, yes. 8-) I remember seeing that with an all-night audience, and that one is unexplainable enough to be perfect Joel/CT riffing material, if even just for the ending (SPOILER: Think post-ET “Alien meets Trumpy”.)
And I’m all for S4 sentimentality bringing back the Ferrigno “Hercules”, which balances some goofy stop-motion with sets and costumes that shout “High school play”.
Here’s some more to consider:
Cy Warrior: Special Combat Unit starring Henry Silva
Attack of the Beast Creatures
The Astounding She-Monster
Invasion of the Blood Farmers
Rescue Force(1990)
She Demons
They Saved Hitler’s Brain
Robowar starring Reb Brown
Girl Gang
Jail Bait starring Steve Reeves
Highway Hell
The Naked Road (1959)
The Howling 2 (electric boogaloo) staring Reb Brown and Christopher Lee. Soooo amazing.
Per the official newsletter from 1990 before Season 2 started, they hinted at what films they were going to do that season, and SST Death Flight was heavily implied to be included.
They probably couldn’t get the rights back. A shame, and I’d LOVE to see it get a proper re-riff.
Sheer brilliance! I love this idea!
Mystics In Bali. May be a little intense but rife with riff potential. http://youtu.be/rTSmcL_nhT4
Dracula 3000!!!
You’d have to bleep and pixel a lot, but I have to think “Sucker Punch” would be fertile ground.
Others:
“Breaker Breaker” — Chuck Norris CB trucker movie
Any early Jean-Claude vanDamme film
Manos: The Hands of Fate.
The Starfighter
and for the hell of it
The Spy Who Came in from the Cold
Blacula
Shaft
Even though I kinda like the movie, I think Roger Corman’s “Battle Beyond the Stars” if ripe for riffing.
I’d love to see…
1. From Hell It Came
2. The Frozen Dead
3. Scared to Death (cuz you gotta have a Lugosi movie in there somewhere)
4. The Godmonster of Indian Flats
5. The Monster of Piedras Blancas
6. Bride of the Gorilla (with Raymond Burr)
7. Alligator Man (cuz you also gotta have a Beverly Garland movie!)
8. Konga
9. Nukie
10. Monstroid
11. Glen or Glenda (… and you also gotta have Ed Wood in there, plus – bonus – Bela Lugosi again)
12. The Boy Who Saved Christmas (one for the holidays)
Atomic Submarine, King Kong vs Godzilla, Kronos
Catwoman
Tiptoes
So I dimly remembered a site from back in the day filled with reader submitted MST-fodder, and thanks to Google: http://www.m5p.com/~pravn/mst3k/suggested.html
Lots of good stuff in there, but also some eye-roll fodder. (Twister? Tora Tora Tora?) Anyway, if you like reading snarky reviews of movies (as I do), it’s kind of fun. And if you’ve seen any of the movies on there, it’s also fun to see how opinions differ, or what made the biggest impression.
Anyway, reading it reminded me of Battle Beyond the Stars, though I remember it being duller than the reviewer did.
Curse of Bigfoot. Yes, the Rifftrax guys did it, but it’s bad enough to take a double dose of riffing…
All the movies that were rumoured to be riffed on at some point: Master Ninja 3, Starship Invasions, Baffled!, that John Travolta/Lily Tomlin movie, Charro!. Note: I may be making half this s*** up.
I would love to see the Coleman Frances and Ed Wood collections reinvigorated.
Only one that have not been mentioned, yet, but would still be good:
The Hand of Death (John Agar)
Night Fright (more John Agar)
Invaders from Mars (the original, preferably the British version)
The Monolith Monsters
The Maze
Die Hard
The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy )for obvious reasons)
A couple of these have already been done by RiffTrax, and there’s one re-riff of an old KTMA movie, but basically, here again with slight additions is my Fantasy Season 11, which I posted here before maybe a year or so back. You’ll notice that nothing here is newer than 1979; I confess to being biased toward ancient, well-aged cheese that’s closer to the crusty, cheesy roots of MST3K:
1: Ed Wood’s Jail Bait, from 1954, with Lyle Talbot, Ed Wood’s main squeeze Delores Fuller, and Timothy Farrell (“Skalli” in Racket Girls). Ed Wood attempts film noir. That’s right, Ed Wood film noir.
2: Roger Corman’s Not Of This Earth. One of Bev Garland’s best performances. She really is good. In fact, this pictues is almost too good to riff — and mind you, I’m talking about a Corman flick, here.
3: King of the Zombies, circa mid 1940s, with Dick Foran and Mantan Moreland.
4: Voodoo Woman, starring Marla English (from The She-Creature) (excerpts) Also stars Touch Connors, later to become Mike Connors of “Mannix” fame.
5: Mesa Of Lost Women, (riffed by RiffTrax) with Jackie Coogan, featuring a fast one-shot bit part by Delores Fuller (see Jail Bait) as one of the aforementioned Lost Women. In my opinion, the best Ed Wood picture that wasn’t actually directed by Ed Wood.
6: Killers From Space, starring a savage young Peter Graves. (riffed by The Film Crew)
7: Larry Buchanan’s Mars Needs Women, (excerpt), featuring a post-beach Tommy Kirk and a pre-Batgirl Yvonne Craig. Buchanan Just Didn’t Care a tiny bit less on this. The scene early in the picture at the USAF installation with the manic-faced officer is priceless.
8: Astro Zombies, starring our old pal John Carradine (from The Unearthly and Red Zone Cuba), with Tura Satana (from Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill!), Wendall Corey (from Women Of The Prehistoric Planet and Agent From HARM) and Tom Pace (from Girl In Gold Boots) (trailer)
9: Cat Women Of The Moon. My favorite line: “May I serve you, Earthman?” That should tell you all you need to know. Features repurposed spacecraft interior sets from Project Moonbase... or was it the other way around?
10: SST Death Flight, 1977ish, with an all-star cast of ’60s has-beens — including the inimitable Peter Graves — and ’70s B-listers, exploiting a genre which had already been beaten to death by the time this made-for-TV slab of either bad meat or good cheese was produced. One last episode to complete the MST3K Peter Graves Festival, a movie which, by all rights, should’ve been re-riffed instead of Time Of The Apes. Makes my nose wheel mushy just thinking about this getting the treatment it deserves.
11: Starcrash, from 1979, is a classic of the niche genre of Shameless Cheap Star Wars Knockoffs from the late ’70s and early ’80s, starring ex-Bond Girl Caroline Munro and the one and only Marjoe Gortner, along with poor old Christopher Plummer as the aged Good Guy Emperor of some kind. I forget. From Sound of Music to this. Poor guy. Bond Girl and Marjoe are acting as if they’re coked out of their ever-lovin’ minds (and probably were) through nearly the entire picture.
12: Ed Wood’s Plan Nine From Outer Space. (riffed by RiffTrax) Characterized by Mike Nelson as “the Citizen Kane” of bad movies”, this bomb was well done up by RiffTrax, but it’s still a drag that it never got the proper MST3K “treatment”.
Plenty of SciFi related films in the list…hopefully Joel finds a film matching Daddy-O, Untamed Youth, Girl In Gold Boots, etc.
The Roller Blade Seven
Tail Sting (2001)
Invasion of Inner Earth (1974)
Star Quest: The Odyssey (2009)
Nukie
Alright, yeah, Jail Bait; I see you dig that crappy Ed Wood film noir, too.
Actually, now that you mention Reb Brown, how could they not riff Yor, Hunter From The Future?
Yaaay Nukie – he could be our next Trumpy!
Love the Giant Claw! These are great ideas – I have The Brain from Planet Arous on DVD and yup, it’d be perfect.
I’ve always thought the trilogy of TNT made for TV Librarian movies would make great riffing material.
I have really enjoyed RT’s recent riffs of late-90s big budget movies (Starship Troopers, Anaconda, Godzilla). Two of the most laughably bad 90s movies that I can remember are Speed 2 and At First Sight (with Val Kilmer). I’m sure the rights would be prohibitively expensive, but one can only hope.
Aaaahhh… to add to mine above…
I don’t think anyone has listed the Russian Finnish films they didn’t use before…
Snow Queen
Snow Maiden
etc etc
Actually quite a few to fill a whole season I’ll bet. I haven’t seen any of the ones not used before so this is a shot in the dark. I do plan on checking them out soon.
Some great suggestions above. How about some of the wilder TV horrors of the 70s
Satan’s School for Girls – Aaron spelling production starring Kate Jackson
The Bees – Swarm ripoff with John Saxon and John Carradine which also features what the Medveds called Angel Tompkins’ worst performance (which is saying something)
How about a Gamera movie they haven’t done yet, like Gamera Super Monster, which is filled with stock footage goodness! Or if they want to bring it more up to date do the last Gamera film from 2006, Gamera the Brave.
I have a soft spot for the Teen-sploitation movies they did, so anything in that genre would be great. Like the return of Cabbage Patch Elvis himself, Arch Hall Jr. in Wild Guitar. Directed by Ray Dennis Steckler, aka Cash Flagg from The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zombies. Can you imagine?
Anything with Mamie Van Doren in it, like Sex Kittens go to College, just look at the credits of this move: Mamie, Marty Milner, John Carradine, Conway Twitty, Tuesday Weld, Jackie Coogan, Vampira. Wow. Actually, anything that the producer of ‘Girls Town’ did would be a great candidate.
Oh, I have the perfect one. So ripe for almost all possible comedy carnage.
Battlefield Earth.
Fear and Desire by Stanley Kubrick.
Slow, dull, stupid. Totally riffable. A lot of quiet spots for jokes. Plus the audacity of doing a Stanley Kubrick movie would get the show some attention!
Three that would be amazing: “Starcrash” (1978), “Robo Vampire” (1988), and “Godmonster of Indian Flats” (1973). Also “The Brain from Planet Arous” (1957).
You’d never pry the rights away from the Hubbard contingency
Not to mention Xenu
The Rifftrax commentary for it proves you right (about comedy carnage), too
Shades of ET most definitely. It would be a classic Joel/bots I think. A shame they didn’t do it originally.
Thou Shalt Not Kill, Except. Also called Styker’s War. The director’s commentary almost does a good job of “riffing” it, but I think the fellas at MST3K would have a field day.
Unless the guys are done doing older movies. In that case, easy question. Just go to Netflix and look for movies with 1-2 stars. Bam, instant Riff fodder.
#28, I don’t believe we’ll be getting beyond Thunderdome anytime soon.
Except there’s a really *ahem* Incongruous “entertainment” bit in the middle they may want to edit out.
The entire Gamma One series is worthy of riffing.
Zardoz
Santa Claus The Movie (The one with Dudley Moore and John Lithgow)
The Legend of Boggy Creek (the did the sequel, why not The Original?)
The Oogieloves
There’s always Attack Of The The Eye Creatures’ brother-in-crap Zontar The Thing From Venus.
The Wild Geese
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Wild_Geese
Wild Geese 2 (yes there was a sequal)
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wild_Geese_II
Code Name: Wild Geese (not related to both)
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Code_Name:_Wild_Geese
Trust me on these. 1. The Stabilizer 2. Merc Force 3. The Intruder aka Rambu 4. Double Crosser. What’s the best way to try to get some love from MST3K for these gems?
Ghost Rider short https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mOhp1NOGCg0
This movie.
Death Bed: The Bed That Eats
Please? Oh, please.
After Last Season https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kPPRB6ErOIU
The Pack (1977) – Joe Don Baker vs. killer dogs… that pretty much writes itself.
Goliath and the Dragon (1960) – A genuine Hercules film in Europe, inexplicably re-titled for American consumption, incomprehensibly dubbed and re-edited, and filled with centaurs, Cerberus, a stop-motion dragon, and a killer bear, all executed with, umm, rather more ambition than the crew of this one had the technical capability to pull off. A lot happens, and it’s all goofy.
Pulgasari (1985) – North Korea’s Kim Jong-il was such a cineaste, he had the leading South Korean director Shin Sang-Ok and his wife kidnapped from their side of the DMZ to make movies for Kim’s production company. Among those was this Golem-like tale of a doll come to life and grown to amazing colossal proportions to defend the proletariat, brought to life by staff imported from Toho. Shin later escaped North Korea, moved to Hollywood, and produced the “Three Ninjas” films, which I guess was a step up?
Queen of Outer Space, with Zsa Zsa Gabor, a bunch of Miss America pageant contestants, and the costumes from Forbidden Planet.
Also, The Day of the Triffids, an actually-decent British sci-fi movie but one that has lots of riffing possibilities.
I will see your Deathbed (one of the WORST movies ever BTW) and raise you a Frankenstein’s Great Aunt Tilley
1984 – Donald Pleasance.
Here’s a few:
The Satan Bug–It’s a decent little thriller, but still really riffable-and it has Richard Basehart and James Doohan!
The Abominable Dr. Phibes–I really like this Vincent Price movie, but it also has a lot of opportunities
Any of the old “The Fly” movies