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Sampo & Erhardt

Sci-Fi Archives

Visit our archives of the MST3K pages previously hosted by the Sci-Fi Channel's SCIFI.COM.

Goodbye Sci-Fi

Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy and Bill Corbett reflect on MST3K's final broadcast.

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Weekend Discussion Thread–Episode Guide, First Draft: 1101- Reptilicus

Last modified on 2017-04-29 02:23:19 GMT. 169 comments. Top.

Opening: Space trucker and rebellious Renaissance man Jonah Heston is returning to Gizmonic Institute with a load of meteors, when he receives a phony distress call from Moon Base 13 on the dark side of the moon. Jettisoning his load, he lands and is immediately captured and brought to the  underground lair of Kinga Forrester, daughter of Clayton Forrester, granddaughter of Pearl Forrester. With her is her chief henchman, who calls himself TV’s Son of TV’s Frank, but whom everyone calls Max. Kinga announces that she is restarting her family’s greatest experiment, Mystery Science Theater 3000.
Intro: Jonah introduces Tom and Crow and demonstrates Gypsy’s new voice and flying rig. Also Tom can FLYYYY … but only in theater. Crow wants an improvement. Kinga introducers herself, Max does as well. Jonah shows off his invention: a bubble fan. Kinga introduces the movie.
Segment 1: Jonah & the bots “Every Country Has a Monster.”
Segment 2: Tom Servo clones himself
Segment 3: Jonah reads letters.
Closing: Jonah creates a tiny Copenhagen for Gypsy to destroy; Kinga is not impressed.
Stinger: Petersen gets nutzoid.
Skeleton Crew songs: “Wild Rebels,” [Can somebody tell me what song the second song is?] “Livin’ In Deep 13” and “Canada Song.”
• The new door sequence, as near as I can tell is:
6—Laundry room
3— Bedroom
1—Workshop (aka “the fab lab”)
• For the record, MSTies had to wait 6,424 days since the debut of episode 1003- MERLIN’S SHOP OF MYSTICAL WONDERS.
• The new lyrics to the theme song (please correct if I have something wrong:
Har Mar Superstar: In the not-too-distant future, Next Sunday A.D.
There was a guy named Jonah, Not too different from you or me
He worked at Gizmonic Institute, Just another mug in a yellow jump suit
A distress call came in for him at half past noon
That’s when an evil woman trapped him on the dark side of the moon.
[Kinga] I’ll send him cheesy movies, the worst I can find
He’ll have to sit and watch them all and I’ll monitor his mind
Now keep in mind that Jonah can’t control when the movies begin or end
So he’ll have to keep his sanity with the help of his robot friends
Cambot, Gypsy, Tom Servo Crowwww
[Har Mar Superstar] If you’re wondering how he eats and breathes and other science facts
Just repeat to yourself: “It’s just a show, I should really just relax”
for Mystery Science Theater 3000.

Other thoughts and observations
• That’s Erin Gray and Will Wheaton as the Gizmocrats.
• The little device that taps into Jonah’s ship plays a little mechanical version of the old theme song, and Jonah says it “sounds familiar.”
• There’s a pyramid in Jonah’s payload…hmmm…
• oel plays “Ardy,” the “movie in the hole” guy.
• My observation is that the riffing begins slowly but eventually picks up steam.
• Callbacks: “I’m squishy” (Young Man’s Fancy), Killer Shrews were mentioned.
• At one point there’s a bit of a drum beat in theater when Jonah does a riff on “Monster Mash.” A bit of a departure…
• There is much excitement about the “Hamilton”-esque monster song, but my question is: No mention of England and Gorgo?
• Isn’t it nice to have Rebecca (the new voice of Gypsy) there for harmonizing purposes?
• Gypsy brings something — a cooler maybe? — into the theater and then makes a riff!! Later she removes it. We’ve been told that it is “the payload.” Nobody involved with the show will say what it is…
• Fave riff: “How about Reporticus Shutupicus?” Honorable mention: “It’s just a sign that says ‘Made you look’!”

Okay offer your thoughts!

Weekend Discussion Thread–Episode Guide, First Draft: 1102- Cry Wilderness

Last modified on 2017-04-29 02:20:09 GMT. 150 comments. Top.

Movie: (1987) A young boy, alerted by Big Foot that is forest ranger father is in peril, travels to the woods to save him.

Opening: Gypsy is working on some overhead wiring and is dropping objects on J&tB. Crow tries to catch one and fails.
Invention exchange: Jonah uses a theramin for Thanksgiving music; the Mads have rotating Carvel Ice Cream characters.
Segment 1: The bots are laughing raccoons and Jonah is a laughing dad
Segment 2: Jonah explains how the movie got made
Segment 3: Brain Guy, Bobo and Pearl visit Kinga and Max
Closing: Crow & Tom, wearing a Red Hawk disguise, try to trick Max into giving them the keys to Jonah’s ship.
Stinger: Big game hunter guy chews on gristle.

• Skeleton Crew songs: “To Earth,” “Creepy Girl,” “Sidehackin,” “United Servo Academy Men’s Chorus Hymn.”

• Jonah explains that he is required to act out the show open each time.
• Interesting riff: “This looks like a state park.” In the ACEG, Mary Jo denigrated this very type of riff.
• There is a long quiet space during Red Hawk’s monolog
• Increasingly obscure riff: “I also have dental practice in Minnesota.”
• Callbacks: “Rowsdower?” (Final Sacrifice), a mention of an interociter (This Island Earth).
• Fave riff: “Wikipedia, the print edition, at last.” Honorable mention: “Let’s head out to supercuts, son. I’m buyin.’”


Weekend Discussion Thread–Episode Guide, First Draft: 1103- The Time Travelers

Last modified on 2017-05-06 17:14:24 GMT. 84 comments. Top.

Movie: (1964) A group of scientists create a portal that takes them to a barren, mutant-inhabited Earth.

Opening: J&tB are playing a game of “Never Did I Ever”
Invention exchange: Crow has Dr. Crow’s Old Edible Silica Packets; The Mads have the Afterlife Alert
Segment 1: Gypsy leads a time portal safety drill
Segment 2: Jonah introduces some new robots. Crow and Tom hogpile them
Segment 3: Dr. Varno and Larry visit on Rocket Number 9
Closing: The bots are delighted to have time travel dopplegangers; Kinga is seeking anniversary dollars
Stinger: Danny is diggin’ it.
• Skeleton Crew songs: “Wild Rebels,” “Oh I Wish I Was in Old Canada,” “United Servo Academy Men’s Chorus Hymn,” “To Earth.”

• This movie was made in an interesting era when the writers knew what lasers were, but the actors still didn’t know how to pronounce them.
• Tom pushing the rocket up is probably the best use so far of his flying abilities
• Steve Franken in two out of the first three movies? What are the odds?
• Callbacks: mention of an interociter (“This Island Earth”), “It stinks!” (Pod People).
• I haven’t started cross referencing casts yet, but I do know Merry Anders was in “Women of the Prehistoric Planet.”
• Fave riff: “And which part of the human centipede do YOU want to be?” Honorable mention: “Bechdel test score: zero.”


Weekend Discussion Thread – Episode Guide, First Draft: 1104- Avalanche

Last modified on 2017-05-13 00:24:08 GMT. 88 comments. Top.

Movie: (1978) Vacationers at a winter resort struggle to survive after an avalanche hits
Opening: Crow and Tom are working on their “Mad Bots” script?Invention exchange: Ardy in Moon 14 has some concerns; J&tB have the mouth vacuum; the Mads have the Don La Font-aine 3000?
Segment 1: Crow and Tom are impressed with Rock Hudson’s romantic moves. Jonah tries to talk them down
?Segment 2: As J&tB play Marco Polo, Neville La Roy visits and he and Kinga sing “Our Love Is on Wings (You Can’t See)”
?Segment 3: J&TB decry deliberately stupid hybrid B-movies
?Closing: Night club singer Gypsy sings a wintry medly?
Stinger: Collateral avalanche damage
1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (6 votes, average: 4.50 out of 5)


• Skeleton Crew songs: “I Wish I Was Back in Old Canada,” “Livin’ in Deep 13,” “Sidehackin’,” “Creepy Girl.”
• In the last writeup, I mistakenly got my Steve Franken movies mixed up. What I should have done was wait until this episode and then say: “Steve Franken in two movies in a row? What are the odds?”
• Crow and Tom control drones which carefully block the naughty bits of a naked lady, similar to the umbrella bit in “City Limits.”
• As the helicopter flies in, they do a M*A*S*H-style description of the movie, one that is taken WORD FOR WORD from the synopsis in the IMDB. I know because I also stole MY synopsis above from there, but I rewrote mine a little.
• Neil Patrick Harris pops up out of the blue in a sort of “Dr. Horrible” reunion. The lyrics by Joel, Elliot Kalan and Robert Lopez. The music is by Robert Lopez, arranged and produced by Stephen Oremus.
• The TripAdvisor bit is very funny.
• Callback: “We want to hear California Lady!” (Track of the Moon Beast).
• Fave riff: “1978, you have so many crimes to answer for.” Honorable mention: “o/` Rock rock rock rock rock ’n’ roll search team. o/`”


Weekend Discussion Thread – Episode Guide, First Draft: 1105- The Beast of Hollow Mountain

Last modified on 2017-05-20 05:22:19 GMT. 62 comments. Top.

Movie: (1956) An American cowboy living in Mexico discovers his cattle are being eaten by something, and eventually he finds out what it is.

Opening: Painting day on the SOL
Invention exchange: Jonah has the Disco Cannon; Kinga asks “What if the Titanic had hot water?”
Segment 1: Tom and Crow describe their ideal monster movies
Segment 2: Tom unveils his new fashion line, “The style of Hollow Mountain”
Segment 3: Tom and Crow are festival creatures making Jonah and the Mads are increasingly distraught
Closing: How movies would be improved if characters were eaten by dinosaurs
Stinger: Sarita speaks softly and throws a big stick

• Skeleton Crew songs: “United Servo Academy Chorus,” “To Earth,” “Wild Rebels,” “Creepy Girl”
• Callbacks: “Watch out for snakes!” (Eegah!), “This is where the fish lives” (The Touch of Satan).
• I love the running gag of Margarita dashing off to see her favorite TV show
• Crow sings a version of the theme song. Tom says “Meta!!”
• Fave riff: “Has anyone seen my accent” “It’s not Chuck E. Cheese but there are mice here.” “I mind! Get this gringo off me!” “Is Pancho really worth four wet socks? “Almost a flawless movie then right at the end the spell “thru” wrong!”


Weekend Discussion Thread – Episode Guide, First Draft: 1106- Starcrash

Last modified on 2017-05-27 12:28:49 GMT. 83 comments. Top.

Movie: (1978) An outlaw smuggler and her alien companion are recruited by the Emperor of the Galaxy to rescue his son and destroy a secret weapon owned by the evil Count Zarth Arn.

Opening: J&B are playing spin-the-bottle
Invention exchange: Kinga takes the salsa-filled sombrero to the next level with the Band-Eat-O; Jonah has BB-Servo
Segment 1: Crow has a new screenplay: “World War Space”
Segment 2: Jonah becomes Ackton and the bots are impressed
Segment 3: Venture capitalist Freak Masterstroke visits
Closing: J&tB are playing Starcrash and the Torpedo Sketch
Stinger: Acton is pleased
1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (6 votes, average: 4.50 out of 5)


• Skeleton Crew songs: “Livin’ In Deep 13,” “To Earth,” “United Servo Academy,” “I Wish I Was in Old Canada.”
• Great song in the theater: “A Stranger’s UFO”
• Callbacks: “Chili peppers burned his gut.” (Sidehackers); crappy effects are powerless against me (Prince of Space ), “Pumaman?”
• A notable comment/question on Twitter: No riffs about Marjoe Gortner? Do they not know who Marjoe Gortner was? A good question.
• I guess the big news for this one is Seinfeld’s appearance. Joel really called in some favors with the stunt casting. The performance was GOLD, Jerry! GOLD!.
• The many names of the spaceships is a great list
• Patton says: “It’s moon o’clock and 200 degrees below zero.” Is that a KTMA reference?
• Jonah removes Tom’s head in the theater when he won’t stop the spaceship names.
• Fave riff: “That’s the thing about this movie: it’s not afraid to take its time to aggravate you.” Honorable mention: “Ooh, right in the Shatner!” “That’s not the part I would have started with, but yeah go ahead.”


Weekend Discussion Thread – Episode Guide, First Draft: 1107- The Land that Time Forgot

Last modified on 2017-06-04 00:48:54 GMT. 110 comments. Top.

Movie: (1974) During World War I, a German U-boat sinks a British ship and takes the survivors on board. After it takes a wrong turn, the submarine takes them to the unknown land of Caprona, where they find dinosaurs and neanderthals.

Opening: It’s Gypsy’s birthday!
Invention exchange: J&tB have “M. Night Shyamalan Living” Magazine; then they accuse the Mads of stealing all their inventions
Segment 1: J&tB are playing submarine
Segment 2: The Mads introduce the Moon 14 Mesozoic Ranch Dinosaur BBQ
Segment 3: Crow is worried about turning into a human
Closing: Jonah sends a message in a bottle?
Stinger: Carried off by a pterodactyl
1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (6 votes, average: 4.50 out of 5)


• Skeleton Crew songs: “Sidehackin’,” “Livin’ in Deep 13,” “Creepy Girl,” “United Servo Academy.”
• Callbacks: “Hikeeba!” (Women of the Prehistoric Planet)
• Fave riff: “Don’t tickle the wall clown!” Honorable mention: “Classic no-look pass.” “It’s Crosby, Crosby, Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young.”


Weekend Discussion Thread – Episode Guide, First Draft: 1108- The Loves of Hercules

Last modified on 2017-06-10 02:11:01 GMT. 62 comments. Top.

Movie: (1960) Herc gets involved in palace intrigue in the nation of Ecalia.

Opening: J&tB are binge-watching “Wings”
Invention exchange: Tom Servo has the fried turkey dunk tank; The Mads have the Mexican jumping bean beanbag chair
Segment 1: Jonah, tied to a wall, endures People’s Throwing Court
Segment 2: J&tB discuss the political correctness of mythologies
Segment 3: A new robot, M. Waverly, invades J&tB girly Hercules party
Closing: Everybody is vocalizing
Stinger: Here boldly defeats the hydra
1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (6 votes, average: 4.50 out of 5)


• Skeleton Crew songs: “To Earth,” “United Servo Academy,” “I Wish I Was in Old Canada” and “Livin’ in Deep 13.”
• Love the “ooteeni” cries
• The big news, I guess, is the oh-so-brief appearance of M. Waverly, the first new robot in ages. I think I would have liked him. May he rest in peace.
• Movie observation: Some of the characters call Achilles “Achilles” and some call him “Aculo.” Huh?
• Callbacks: “Time for go to bed” (“The Unearthly), “Any fruit to declare?” (Warrior of the Lost World).
• Fave riff: “I saw it in the window and just had to have it.” Honorable mention: “Barricade by committee always ends like this,” “I’m gonna give you and your dungeon the worst Yelp review ever! I was barely flogged!” “Oh…may not want to go in there yet.”


Weekend Discussion Thread – Episode Guide, First Draft: 1109- Yongary Monster From the Deep

Last modified on 2017-06-16 22:56:20 GMT. 109 comments. Top.

Movie: (1967) Earthquakes in Korea turn out to be the work of Yongary, a prehistoric fire-breathing reptile who’s headed for Seoul.

Opening: J&tB are having their weekly dream journal meeting
Invention exchange: J&tB demonstrate their tiny desks; The Mads have Hitler Coffee
Segment 1: J&tB discuss astronauts and the music they like
Segment 2: Tom explains his monster-themed club, Yongary Nights
Segment 3: J&tB discuss what monster they’d like to be friends with
Closing: J&tB and The Mads sing “Push Past the Hurting”
Stinger: Monster a-go-go
1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (6 votes, average: 4.50 out of 5)


• Skeleton Crew songs: “I Wish I Was in Old Canada,” “United Servo Academy,” “To Earth” and “Creepy Girl.”

• Capsule!
• J&tB are very musical in the theater this time. Lots of singing.
• Callbacks: “I’m huge!”
• The song they sing at the end is another great ditty by Paul & Storm.
• Fave riff: “IM UPSIDE DOWWWWWWWN!” Honorable mention: “Everyone grab one thing. Doesn’t matter what the thing is! Just take it!” “Welcome back to Speaking Spectacles. I’m your host, Glasses McFancyHair.”


Weekend Discussion Thread – Episode Guide, First Draft: 1110- Wizards of the Lost Kingdom, Pt. 1

Last modified on 2017-06-23 21:48:47 GMT. 87 comments. Top.

Movie: (1985) In a fantasy kingdom, a wizard’s son and a warrior battle an evil wizard.

Opening: Max makes a fascinating discovery
Invention exchange: J&tB have Verbal Smoke Bombs; The Mads have the Sponsor Clock
Segment 1: Reasons Kor got the name “conquerer” and explanations for Kor’s face after killing four guys
Segment 2: Jonah sings “The Magic Inside of You”
Segment 3: J&tB read some viewer mail
Closing: Jonah shows Tom the “Wizards of the Suicide Cave: A Place that Feeds on Fear” play set
Stinger: The bowl explodes
1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (6 votes, average: 4.50 out of 5)


• Skeleton Crew songs: “[what song is this?],” “Sidehackin’” “To Earth” and “I Wish I Was in Old Canada.”

• Maybe it was my mood, but this one didn’t pop for me, the first time this season when I’ve had that reaction.
• No Rowsdower reference? Seemed pretty obvious to me.
• Fave riff: “Ralph Maccios assemble!” Honorable mention: “I would face a thousand cyclops brides before I swam through whatever that is.” “Oh they’re showing ‘Little House on the Prairie.’”


Weekend Discussion Thread – Episode Guide, First Draft: 1111- Wizards of the Lost Kingdom II

Last modified on 2017-07-01 16:40:41 GMT. 98 comments. Top.

Movie: (1989) In-name-only sequel to the previous movie. Three kingdoms have been overtaken by three evil lords and only Tyor, a teenage boy with magical powers, can restore peace to the land.

Opening: It’s raining and nobody can go out and play
Invention exchange: J&tB have GIF Notes; the Mads have Punt Bunnies
Segment 1: Dark One’s Renaissance Inn and Grille franchise video
Segment 2: Jonah explains the ’80s wizard comedy craze
Segment 3: Grandma Pearl and crew visit and Kinga’s getting married!
Closing: Jonah suggests good movies to counteract various aspects of a bad movie
Stinger: Tyor gets a popeye arm
1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (6 votes, average: 4.50 out of 5)


• Skeleton Crew songs: “[what song is this?],” “Sidehackin’” “To Earth” and “I Wish I Was in Old Canada.”

• Again, maybe it’s my mood, but this one was MUCH funnier.
• Great to see Pearl, Brain Guy and Bobo again. I thought this appearance was more relaxed and funny than the last one.
• Callbacks: “Time for go to bed!” “The Chicken of Tomorrow”
• Fave riff: “I’d be more terrified if they both weren’t wearing relaxed-fit Dockers.” Honorable mention: “Little lions! Whisper your secrets to us!” and “I’m forming a Stockholm Syndrome situation with David Carradine’s legs.”


Weekend Discussion Thread – Episode Guide, First Draft: 1112- Carnival Magic

Last modified on 2017-07-07 00:17:11 GMT. 86 comments. Top.

Movie: (1981) A clairvoyant magician and his talking chimp become a carnival sensation.

Opening: Tom is giving a TOM Talk
Invention exchange: Kinga announces her wedding; J&tB have Yeasta Pets; The Mads have Flavor Sweat
Segment 1: Carnival barker Tom presents Markov & Alexander.”
Segment 2: Highway patrol Tom & Crow exchange cop-code radio calls
Segment 3: PT Mindslap and the Great Space Circus Show visit, but Kinga and Max chase him off
Closing: Kinga and Max narrate the disturbing carnival parade
Stinger: Sad cop sitting on his car gets towed away.
1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (6 votes, average: 4.50 out of 5)


• Skeleton Crew songs: “Livin’ in Deep 13,” “Sidehackin’,” “Tom Servo Chorus” and “Wild Rebels.”

• Wow, this movie! Just … whew. I saw people talking about it when it was announced. I’d never heard of it. But … wow. I will say that it reminds me very much of “Carnival of Souls.” Both are hopelessly amateurish.
• Clearly the big news is the appearance of Mark Hamill — he even sings! If you’d told me two years ago that I would be typing that, I’d have said you were crazy.
Who’s the guy on the bridge for a moment in segment 3
• Classic riff: “Put your shoes on, honey, we’re almost at Grandma’s.”
• Callbacks: “Watch Out for Snakes!” (Eegah).
• Fave riff: “Two words: cattle prod.” Honorable mention: “Polov!” “Did he just pitch them a ‘Planet of the Apes’ sequel?”


Weekend Discussion Thread – Episode Guide, First Draft: 1113- The Christmas that Almost Wasn’t

Last modified on 2017-07-15 00:07:42 GMT. 64 comments. Top.

Movie: (1966) Santa has to get a job — as a department store Santa — to earn money to pay his overdue rent bill.

Opening: Jonah wants to sing a Christmas carol, but picks the one song people don’t know the words to
Invention exchange: Kinga still plans to marry Jonah, but Synthia isn’t helping; J&tB have the Re-Gifter; the Mads have Humbug FM
Segment 1: J&tB review classic Santa toys
Segment 2: J&tB try to explain the creepy toys
Segment 3: Santa and Baby Whipple visit
Closing: Christmas slide show
Stinger: Hohohohoho, hey Sam, this is fun! Hohoho!
1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (6 votes, average: 4.50 out of 5)


• Skeleton Crew songs: All four breaks feature the band’s version of “Patrick Swayze Christmas.”

• The “I’m a baby” running gag just doesn’t land for me. Sorry…
• The scene with the kids giving pouring out of houses to give Santa money must have been a scene that seemed very familiar to Joel.
• Is this the first time Jonah has summoned “Jet Screen”?
• That was Elliot Kalan as Baby Whipple.
• Classic riff: “They’ve created their own Thunderdome.” “Jonah, can’t we get beyond Thunderdome?”
• Fave riff: “You can always tell when a building used to be an i-Hop.” Honorable mention: “Wow this tea kicked in fast!” and “You sure you’re not confusing children with spiders?”


Weekend Discussion Thread – Episode Guide, First Draft: 1114- At the Earth’s Core

Last modified on 2017-07-22 11:25:24 GMT. 52 comments. Top.

Movie: (1976) A Victorian era scientist and his assistant take a test run in their Iron Mole drilling machine and end up in a strange underground world.

Opening: J&tB are having a pre-nuptial heart-to-heart but the Jonah introduces Growler
Invention exchange: With nobody coming to her wedding, Kinga turns to the Observer Hive Mind Manager. The bots have permanent temporary tattoos; The Mads have the Rip Taylor urn cannon
Segment 1: Jonah gives the bots a steampunk makeover
Segment 2: Crow’s a Mahar
Segment 3: Doug McClure visits and offers Max some romantic advice
Closing: As the wedding draws near, Pearl, Bobo and Brain Guy appear to give their blessing, but in the midst of the vows, Max has other plans.
Stinger: “He died as he lived…”
1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (6 votes, average: 4.50 out of 5)


• Skeleton Crew songs: “I Wish I was in Old Canada,” “Livin’ in Deep 13,” “To Earth” and “Wild Rebels.”

• Well, one of the headlines, if not the biggest one, is the appearance by Joel McHale. In a season full of guest stars, he held his own.
• Biggest news: Jonah’s apparent death. I assume season 12, if there is one, will find him making a miraculous recovery…
• As a kid who grew up in the Philadelphia area, I enjoyed the reference to the giant heart you can climb through at the Franklin Institute.
• Classic riff: “Gamera is friend to all the children,” and “And the crowd goes wild! Yay!”
• Callbacks: Pearl sings a few bars of “When Loving Lovers Love.”
• More in-theater percussion as J&tB go all “Ballroom Blitz.”
• Nice visual riff: “Fantasia” riff with Tom in Mickey ears.
• Fave riff: “I dreamt I as a protocol droid.” Honorable mention: “Back to the warehouse!” and “This Petco adoption day is now what I thought it was gonna be.”


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