Bit: Crow with the Gold Boots On
Episode 1002: The Crow in Gold Boots
[SOL]
(Servo is watching Crow dance to the
music in the movie. All we can see of Crow, however, are his
legs, and he's wearing gold boots. Servo is wearing
sunglasses.)
Tom: Yeah, alright baby, shake what your momma gave ya!
Yeah! (Mike walks in)
Mike: Hey Tom,
have you seen the Scotch tape? (sees what's going on and is
horrified) What the hell is going on here?
Tom:
Well, we set up a little club
here, Mike.......Good times, man!
Mike: (Somewhat
confused, scared; points at Crow) But Crow! It's
his.....it's his....
Tom:
Shakin' his moneymaker, that's
right! Go baby!
Crow:
Oh, I'm goin'! Check this out!
Watch.... (Turns, so his, um, moneymaker is facing Servo and
Mike, and proceeds to shake it. Mike seems to be disgusted,
trying not to look.)
Tom:
Oh yeah! Shake you good stuff
baby! Whoo hoo!
Mike: (Confused/
disturbed) But Crow, shaking all his various things! And he
has a tiny gold bikini on!
Tom:
But not for long! hehe, he,
he
Crow:
But first you have to stuff money
in it.
Tom:
Oh, yeah, Mike....get my bag...we
gotta start stuffing. I got a roll of singles as big as pork
roast! (Chuckles.)
Mike:
(Confused/disturbed/exasperated) Oh no, no! Crow will keep
all his clothes on, no matter how minuscule they are!
Crow:
I don't even usually wear
clothes, Mike! What's your deal?
Tom:
I think you're uncomfortable
acknowledging Crow as a sexual being.
Mike: He's not a
sexual being! He's a robot! And so are you!
Crow:
Man, you have such body issues,
Mike!
Tom:
(Sarcastically) Mike Taliban
Nelson!
Crow:
You know, I'm sorry if you're
ashamed of your body, Mike. We are not.
Tom:
Ashamed of our bodies, that is.
We are ashamed of yours! (Tom and Mike kinda laugh.)
Crow:
Here I go! (Crow jumps and does
the splits in the air, and takes his top off and throws it
at Mike. Servo is cheering Crow on.)
Mike: Stop it!
Stop it! In the name that is all good and decent! (Then Crow
throws his panties at him, and Mike fumbles them, and drops
them. Mike screams, and runs away.)
Tom:
Hey, baretender! Hook me up with
another longneck and put on! Everybody's workin' for the
weekend! (Now directed towards Crow.) Shake you peach
cobbler, baby! Good times! (Movie sign) Ah, hell, we got
move sign.
(cut)
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