Bit: Scrotor Visits Dr. F (Deleted Scene from MST3K:TM)
Submitted by Jack Theakston
The following is taken directly from the shooting script for the scenes that were later deleted from "MST3K: The Movie." There may be some small discrepancies from the actual scenes as they were shot.
[In the theater]
("This Island Eath" ends. )
Mike: Come on, I've got a plan. (Door sequence)
(Forrester is seen in Hexfield vew screen.)
Dr. F: Haha! Bow down before me, Nelson, bow down...(realizes Mike's not there.) Where the heck is he? (Doors open Servo rushes in.)
Tom (out of breath): Um, Mike is just freshening up before he bows down before you, so I was just wondering if you could tell me when it first became apparent how great you were going to be.
Dr. F: Ah, good question. I remember it was grade school, and at the time it was not uncommon to receive a dozen or even two dozen beatings a day. Then something snapped...
(Mike is wheeling the interociter down the hall. Crow is sitting atop it whistling a little ditty. He is clutching his ant farm and dressed as Trevor Howard. Gypsy is following along.)
(Servo is still standing before Dr. Forrester)
Dr. F: Why, I see the potential for evil in everyone, even you, my friend.
Tom: You think so? 'Cause I've always thought I might have a kind of festering soul like yours. (Behind Servo we see the interociter being wheeled by.)
Dr. F: Yes! Yes! Not nearly as great of course but... oh, I'm just gonna say it: Join me, Servo, and together we can rule the world!
Tom: Yeah sure. Now how does something like that work? Are you incorporated and then I just buy into the company or is it more complicated?
(Cut to Mike, Crow and Gypsy around the interociter. They have moved it near the hexfield, but out of sight of Forrester.)
Mike: OK Gypsy, I'm gonna need a section of your tubing. (Mike plugs one end of the tubing into the Interociter, the other end into the view screen. Cut to Servo, still distracting Dr. Forrester.)
Dr. F: ...so I would probably just pay you as an independent contractor until I was confident that you were ready to help me rule the world, and then some sort of buy-in would make sense to me...(cut to Mike, Crow and Gypsy around interociter.)
Mike: The ant, Mr. Crow. (Crow upends an ant farm and shakes the thing violently. One tiny ant falls onto the desk in front of the Interociter.)
Crow (to ant, tenderly): Good-bye Debbie. Sorry I burnt all of your friends.
Mike (as Exeter): Stand back, Crow, or you may be harmed... (Crow jumps out of the way. The Interociter fires up, concentrating intense (yes very inexpensive) beams of light on the ant. The interociter screen descrambles.)
(Scrotor the Metalunian Mutant Monster appears on the screen. It coughs a bit, shakes itself off and then waves to Mike and the Robots.)
Scrotor: Hey everybody, look at me! I been "Interociterized"!
(Mike throws a very large switch on a panel between the two view screens. A panel on the interociter screen to the left. The Camera pans along the tube connection device to the Hexfield view screen. A panel of the Hex screen flashes, "Receiving". The Mutant enters the Hexfield screen from the right and stands behind Forrester.]
Tom: Weeelll, you gotta be careful with that independent contractor thing. The state's cracking down on people who recieve any kind of regular pay from another business. As far as they're concerned, you're not really independent.
Dr. F: Well, let's worry about that after we see how you do... (Mike and Crow jump into position front and center of the hexfield.) Ahhh, Nelson! Good, good good. Movie got you Down?
Scrotor: Excuse me....
(Scrotor taps Dr. F on the shoulder. Dr. F. glares at the mutant.)
Dr. F: I am talking. (to Mike.) Don't bow down just yet, I'd like a moment to savor...
Scrotor: Excuse me.... (Scrotor sinks his claws into the soft fleshy pink meat around Forrester's love-handle region.)
Dr. F: . Aggghhhh!! I'll get you for this Nelson. (Forrester sinks down in pain. Mike and the BOTS celebrate.)
Mike, Crow and Tom: Yay, Scrotor!! (Scrotor raises his claws in humble triumph.)
Scrotor: Glad I could help, everyone. Well I'm off to Hollywood to get an agent. William Morris here I come.
Mike, Crow and Tom: Bye, Scrotor. (Scrotor exits the screen.)
Mike: Well, that took care of Forrester for the time being. Is everyone okay? (Mike does a head count.) Servo? Gypsy? Crow...Crow?! Ah er...Where's Crow? (In the distance we hear a tiny voice, singing.)
(Crow is straddling a bunch of tubing and spaceship-looking gear. He sports his Doughboy outfit from scene one. He pulls the pull-cord on a chain saw. he found in Servo's bedroom.)
Crow: ....It's a long way to Tipparary, It's a long way to... (Crow chops into the ship hacking wildly. He stops suddenly and then with an impish grin.) Oopsy!