Movie: (1964) A slow-moving alien rug monster manages somehow to catch and swallow many people in a small town with no dialog.

First shown: 9/17/94
Opening: Tom is a security guard
Intro:It’s laundry day in Deep 13, Dr. F. makes the bots pretentious poseurs
Host segment 1: Crow makes a flag for the SOL, and M&tB raise it
Host segment 2: M&tB stick it to “Love American Style”
Host segment 3: Mike sets up his stereo system
End: Crow and Tom want Gypsy to swallow them, Mike reads letters, Dr. F. “presses” Frank about the laundry
Stinger: “My God! What is it?”
(256 votes, average: 4.68 out of 5)
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• I like this episode a lot. The host segments are lots of fun, the riffing is great and while the movie is gray and tedious, at the same time it is TOTALLY OUT THERE. The questions it raises are endless. What’s chained up in the spaceship? Why does the creature look like a Chinese parade dragon? Why did that guy swallow a basketball? Why a full ten minutes of dance hall footage before the the monster arrives? And on and on.
• This episode appears in Rhino’s Mystery Science Theater 3000 Collection, Vol. 1.
• References.
• I love how they added a little drool to Servo’s mouth when they show him sleeping.
• There’s lots of narration and little dialogue, but don’t believe the commonly told story that the soundtrack dropped off of a boat into Lake Tahoe. The movie was shot without sound, with a plan to dub in the dialog later, a la “Manos.” But there wasn’t enough money for that when the time came, so the narration was used instead.
• I’m a little surprised that they chose this movie, and I’m very impressed that they did with it, for this reason: this movie easily ranks in the top 5 of The. Most. REPETITIVE. Movies. Ever. Show some dancing. Show the monster. Then some dancing. Then the monster. Over and over and over. I would rank this right up with “The Starfighters” and “Neptune Men” in terms of a movie that shows you the same thing over and over and over. That they managed to stay funny and come up with a different joke (more or less) every time the movie presented them with the EXACT same image again and again and again, is a real achievement.
• I’m doing these in episode number order, but this was not the next episode fans saw after episode 605- COLOSSUS AND THE HEADHUNTERS. Comedy Central ran episode 609- THE SKY DIVERS the following week, then 607- BLOODLUST the next week, then there was a week break before this episode ran. Then there was another two-week break before the network ran 608- CODE NAME: DIAMOND HEAD followed a week later by 610- THE VIOLENT YEARS. At that point the episodes got back into order.
• This episode aired the same weekend as some 2,000 MSTies from all over the nation were encamped at the Raddison Hotel in Bloomington for the first CONVENTIOCON EXPOFEST-A-RAMA. Unfortunately, the hotel’s TVs did not get Comedy Central, which meant that fans had to find another way to see the episode. I went to the home of a friend who lived in the area.
• This movie has the infamous baby-temperature-taking scene, one of its most commented-upon aspects by bad movie buffs.
• The “Love American Style” bit in segment 2 is sort of meta: a sarcastic premise surrounding a second, intentionally lame, premise. On the plus side, Mike kisses Servo and Crow.
• As Servo notes, it’s a good guess that the director got a pervy little thrill by the image of a woman’s legs (preferably still kicking) being pulled into the monster. I’ve since been told (and I wish I hadn’t) that this is a thing, and the thing is called “Vore.”
• In the ACEG they mentioned that segment 3 was written mostly by Frank, who loves sketches where nothing happens for long stretches. Is Mike’s using a green magic marker on his CD something audiophiles did (or still do?)
• Mike’s line, “another frustrated IBM PC user!” became a widely traded sound file.
• Very neat image with the wringer at the end. Very Joel-like.
• Cast and crew wrap-up: Story and screenplay writer Robert Silliphant also worked on “The Incredibly Strange Creatures…” Special effects guy Clifford Stine also worked on “This Island Earth,” “The Mole People,” “The Deadly Mantis” and “The Thing That Couldn’t Die.”
• CreditsWatch: Host segments directed by Jim Mallon. Jef Maynard is added to the “set design” credit, along with Joel and Trace. Ken Fournelle gets a lighting credit, or any kind of credit, for the last time. He had been involved with the show since season one. Crist Ballas is back to do hair and makeup.
• Fave riff: “We’re the special unit! Helloooooo!!” Honorable mention: “Now, cough, honey.”

Movie: (1960) Maciste leads his people from their destroyed island to a land of warring tribes.

First shown: 8/20/94
Opening: Tom does Crow’s taxes
Intro: Dr. F. invents Nummy Muffin Coocol Butter, the world’s most adorable pet, and sends it to M&tB, much to Frank’s dismay
Host segment 1: A heartbroken Frank sings: “Nummy Muffin Coocol Butter”
Host segment 2: On the SOL, Nummy’s fur is everywhere
Host segment 3: Nummy is sick, Frank is sick, so Mike sends Nummy back to Deep 13
End: Crow wonders: “What does it feel like to get you head chopped off?”, Mike reads letters, while the Mads have been caught by their own creation
Stinger: Exhorting guy gets shot by arrow
(151 votes, average: 3.84 out of 5)
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• The last time around I was sort of luke-warm on the riffing of this one but, I don’t know, I guess I was in the right frame of mind or something, but I was laughing my ass off this time. Of course the headline of the episode is Nummy Muffin Coocol Butter and I’m more luke-warm about those host segments, though Frank’s song is terrific. When this first aired, the segments caused an immediate sensation among fans. I also remember some people didn’t quite get the ending, something Kevin addresses forcefully in the ACEG.
• References
• This episode is not yet on commercial DVD.
• Having heard of the fans’ growing irritation with CC spokesguy Penn Gillette, they use him in a gag. Folks loved that.
• What’s with our hero’s name? Well, what M&tB are hearing as “my cheesesteak” is actually Maciste. Italians know him well. A strongman character with that name goes back all the way to the 1914 Italian movie “Cabiria.” The character was resurrected when the sword-and-sandal epic Italian movies suddenly became very popular in the late 1950s. Because American audiences were unfamiliar with Maciste, the title character’s name was usually changed to Atlas, Colossus, Goliath, Hercules or Samson (for example, the character Hercules, in the movie in episode 410- HERCULES AGAINST THE MOON MEN, was actually Maciste). What’s odd in COLOSSUS AND THE HEADHUNTERS is that the dubbed English dialog still calls the hero Maciste even though the title says otherwise; nobody (other than M&tB) calls him Colossus.
• Non-Spaghetti-ball bumpers: film canister, bulletin board, beaker, book.
• Callbacks: “Watch out for snakes!” (Eegah!)
• Annoying commercial: Commercial for the now-largely forgotten “Moxy Pirate Show.”
• Interesting commercial: The first “Go to where the cheese is made” contest commercial as the first convention approached.
• I think that’s Kevin as the voice of NMCB in segment 3.
• Mildly dirty riff: “Meanwhile, Sonny’s upstairs with the maid of honor…”
• I’d forgotten the queen’s assistant and her wacky dance just before the third segment. What a great movie moment.
• Once again, no cast and crew roundup. This production is too far removed from any of the other Herc titles we’ve done.
• CreditsWatch: Tim Scott ends his five-episode run on the writing staff. David Sussman ends his 17-episode run on the writing staff (he was also a contributing writer for an ep in season four). Host segments directed by Kevin Murphy. The credit “Video Provided by: Fournelle Video Production Services, St. Paul, MN” is replaced by “Video by Jeff Stonehouse.” This continues for the rest of the season. Stoney also gets a lighting credit for the first time, along with Ken Fournelle and Brad Keely. This is the first time Stoney appears in the credits and marks the beginning of his rise to power at BBI. Jann L. Johnson is back sharing Post Production Coordination duties with Ellen McDonough Thomas. And this is the first time “Info Club Coordinator Julie Walker” appears in the credits (she wouldn’t be “Poobah” until later in the season.)
• Fave riff: “This is history’s first really awkward moment.” Honorable mention: “Uh, what’s following them?”

Movie: (1986) A voodoo queen resurrects a dead teen, who then seeks revenge on his killers.

First shown: 11/24/94
Opening: Crow and Tom are Secret Service agents protecting Mike
Intro: The Mads are into voodoo, so they send a voodoo kit to the SOL
Host segment 1: Crow is reading when Tom runs him down!
Host segment 2: Mike, Crow and Tom enjoy a hot tub
Host segment 3: Crow abandoned his “Batman” screenplay, but neglected to tell Tom and Mike
End: Letters for Adam West, Frank has turned Dr. F. into a zombie
Stinger: Incantation and screaming
(269 votes, average: 4.70 out of 5)
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• It’s hard not to like this episode. The movie is big and bold and insane, the riffing is fantastic and the segments have a goofy, happy-go-lucky quality that I like.
• This episode appears on Shout’s Mystery Science Theater 3000 Collection: Vol. XV.
• This episode was held from TV while it made the rounds of many college campuses, during the fall of ’94, as part of Comedy Central’s “Fresh Cheese” tour. It was finally shown on Turkey Day ’94.
• I saw it in the University of Pennsylvania’s cavernous Irvine Auditorium. The sound was terrible and the place was about half full. One of the school’s modern and luxurious (at least at that time) screening rooms might have been a better venue. Anybody else see the college tour?
• This ep marks the change from green to the solid blue jumpsuit we saw Mike wear for much of this season.
• Do you think that “Head!” thing was planned? After so many accidental beheadings of Tom, it nice to think they did this one on purpose.
• This week it’s the “umbilicus.”
• Non-spaghetti ball bumpers: bulletin board, beaker, book
• Segment 1 is related to the movie — he runs Crow over just like the kids just ran over the guy. But it’s also the beginning of a running gag for season six, in which Tom repeatedly — and cheerfully — smashes Crow in various ways. Unfortunately, this episode, where the running gag begins, wasn’t shown in order, so some of the humor of the running gag was a drained away.
• Tom imitates a Jamaican guy attempting to lure tourists to his jet ski/parasail business. I understand that the cast vacationed together in Jamaica at least once. Maybe that’s where this came from.
• The song Tom is singing at the beginning of segment 2 is “Walkin’ in Memphis,” by Marc Cohn.
• Callbacks: “I’d never touch you, Terry. You’re dirt!” (Teenage Crime Wave)
• Second “Governor and JJ” reference in a few weeks.
• The original film was MUCH gorier. Tia Carrera’s character’s death, to give one example, is far more gruesome than we see here.
• Also, the attempted rape of the Twist N Creme waitress by Jimbo is much more explicit and brutal in the original (the original is on YouTube). There is a huge edit, shades of “Sidehackers,” from the point where Jimbo grabs her and the next scene, where she is wrapped in a blanket telling the cops what happened. That scene also includes the gruesome, explicit and completely deserved onscreen impalement death of that jerk Jimbo. The edit kind of robs us of that cinematic justice.
• I exchanged emails with a representative for Jon Mikl Thor, and he revealed three interesting bits of info.
1. The soundtrack list includes bands called The Things and Knighthawk. They are just Thor in disguise (dull surprise!). 2. A band called Battalion does a song called “Out For The Kill.” That New York City-based band did exist, and even had their own comic book. (Thor co-produced their first album.) Sadly, Thor told us the guitar player of Battalion committed suicide by leaping off a 35-story building in New York City just before their album was to be released, and they were to embark on a U.S. tour. This turn of events ended the band, the release of the album and the tour. 3. A band called Deathmask, reportedly one of the first speed-metal bands, did a song called “I’m Dangerous.” Thor invested a lot of time, money and effort into the band. He helped get them a record deal and then co-produced the record. But, for reasons that are not remembered, the band refused to tour (which is sort of required to back up an album). Without the effort from the band to get out there to promote and tour, Deathmask then faded into obscurity.
• No cast and crew roundup this time: Nobody involved with this worked on any other MSTed movies.
• CreditsWatch: Host segments directed by Trace Beaulieu. This is the final episode for the credit: Video Provided by: Fournelle Video Production Services, St. Paul, MN. The second of two episodes where Sarah E. Wisner helped out with Post Production Coordination with Ellen McDonough Thomas,
• Fave riff: “C’mon, turn the tape over!!” Honorable mention: “They’re missing the forest for the trees with this whole sleazy chicks thing.”