The Grinches Who Stole MST<\/strong><\/p>\n All the MSTies liked MST3K a lot, I remember somebody at BBI saying the phrase “midwestern puppet riff-raff” became a catch-phrase in the studio for a few days…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
\nbut the folks who ran Comedy Central did NOT.
\nThey all hated the show and the whole MSTie throng.
\nAnd they hated the robots! And they hated the song!
\nBut the thing that the channel guys most strongly hated
\nwas they had no control over how Best Brains made it.
\nThey liked to think THEY knew what comedy was!
\nThey longed to create the next comedy buzz!
\nThey loved it when people said they were the hippest
\nOut there on the “cutting edge,” being the flippest.
\nThen the ratings came out and the news did apall:
\nAll those viewers weren’t watching “The Kids In the Hall.”
\n“After all of our work to find cutting edge shows,
\nAll our viewers are watching Tom Servo and Crow’s!”
\nThey asked, in a meeting that went past 11,
\n“How come people don’t love Exit 57??
\nWhy don’t they get off on the great Benny Hill?
\nDon’t they know we know better and that we always will?
\nWe’ll TELL them what’s funny, be they brown, black or honky.
\nWe’ll MAKE them love genius like “Drop the Dead Donkey!”
\nAnd since our shows CAN’T be upstaged by a puppet,
\nwhen their contract comes due, we’re not going to re-up it!
\nNo way are some midwestern puppet riff-raff
\ngonna prove they know more about making folks laugh!
\nSo when the time came to discuss season eight,
\nthe nice folks at Best Brains were just shown to the gate.
\nBut then word started spreading, by fax and on-line
\nThat the future of MST3K is not fine.
\nSo the MSTies stood up and they yelled, loud and clear,
\nAnd they said, “Oh, fer cryin’ out loud in the beer!
\nThis show is a hit! Like that park that’s Jurassic!
\nCome on, you blind fools, it’s a comedy classic!!
\nThere’s a movie a-comin’ and a CD-ROM too
\nAnd a book that will bring even more fans to you.
\nSo don’t be so proud, don’t be so high and mighty
\nSo it’s NOT “cutting edge!” Must you be so up-tighty?
\nIf you should reconsider, and stop being such rats,
\nwho knows, we might even watch ol’ Dr. Katz!
\nSo we’re begging, in poses so meek and supine,
\nPlease give to us all Season Eight–oh, and Nine!
\nAnd TEN, while you’re at it! Let’s lock the deal up!
\nYou’d be quite embarrassed if some upstart pup
\nof a network, somebody like Sci-fi or E!,
\nwas still making a mint in the next century
\nfrom the show you passed over as not “cutting edge.”
\nIt would be a disaster! You might go for the ledge!
\nSo PLEASE, we all ask, in a chorus most rousin:
\nPLEASE SAVE MYSTERY SCIENCE THEATER 3000!!!!!<\/p>\n