Movie: (1974) During World War I, a German U-boat sinks a British ship and takes the survivors on board. After veering off course, the submarine arrives at the unknown land of Caprona, where the crew finds dinosaurs and neanderthals.
Opening: It’s Gypsy’s birthday!
Invention exchange: J&tB have “M. Night Shyamalan Living” Magazine; then they accuse the Mads of stealing all their inventions
Segment 1: J&tB are playing submarine
Segment 2: The Mads introduce the Moon 14 Mesozoic Ranch Dinosaur BBQ
Segment 3: Crow is worried about turning into a human
Closing: Jonah sends a message in a bottle?
Stinger: Carried off by a pterodactyl
(66 votes, average: 3.92 out of 5)
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• This one was diverting, I’ll give you that. The movie is SO odd. And the funny riffs, while not a gusher, flowed steadily. I’d call this one good not great.
• Jonah calls the screen that comes down behind him the “Jet Screen.”
• Apparently the main spot where they cut the movie for time was the third time the sub changed hands, when the Americans regained control of the ship. Ardy says that’s what he’s seeing in the fluid leak.
• Is there a name for that cute little squid? I hope we see more of him.
• Callbacks: “Hikeeba!” (Women of the Prehistoric Planet) was said a couple of times. Also: “He said ‘area,'” a callback to the, I think, Bridget-inspired riffs about “areas.” Also: “Packers!” and “Watch out for snakes!”
• The whole “stop repeating what I say,” gag is a nice running bit.
• “Jingle’s self aware, now it’s doin’ what it wants to…” is a great topper to a bit that had been going on a little long.
• Increasingly obscure riff: When a caveman is shown, they make a car insurance joke, a reference to the nearly-forgotten Geico commercials that got spun off to a short-lived TV show. Also: “Double rainbow!” a reference to once-popular a viral video.
• Cast and crew roundup: Many people involved with this movie were also involved with “At the Earth’s Core,” which I will just call “ATEC.” Doug McClure was also in “ATEC” and “SST- Death Flight.” Keith Baron, Godfrey James and Bobby Parr were all also in “ATEC.” Behind the camera, producer John Dark also produced “ATEC.” Max Rosenberg also produced “ATEC” and “The Incredible Melting Man. Milton Subotsky also produced “ATEC,” editor John Ireland also edited “ATEC” and art director Bert Davey also art directed “ATEC.” Special effects supervisor Derek Meddings also did visual effects for “Revenge of the Mysterious from Mars” and “Invaders from the Deep.” (Hooboy!)
• Fave riff: “Don’t tickle the wall clown!” Honorable mention: “Classic no-look pass.” “It’s Crosby, Crosby, Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young.”
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sub movies: “fantastic voyage” kinda counts, doesn’t it? :) and yes agreed; “das boot” is easily the best of the bunch, but more for being such an excellent drama that is more about “the human condition” than just being an insider’s view of nazi-era sub warfare. (u-571, though lacking in pretty much every other way, was a bit superior in terms of effects; you actually -see- the sub rattling like a tin-can from the depth charges.)
as far as our first foray into mclure-land this season, the riff is great overall; if they’d done these all in order (as it seems they’ve said is the case), they’re pretty well settling into their own groove by now.
a lot of my enjoyment of the eps does vary on the movie itself – and though i’m a child of the seventies and grew up on this stuff (pretty sure i’d seen both this and “earth’s core” at least once back in the era of “abc monday-friday night movies”), even back then, i found this sort of fifties/sixties-style fantasy/scifi a bit underwhelming; these were always good ones to have on in the background while i drew or played with legos instead. ;0 there’s just a sluggish pace and overall soap-opera-ish feel to the character interaction that left us kids yawning a bit… we were already pre-wired for the quicker pace and wall-to-wall effects of “star wars”.
count me in on diggin’ the moon 14 dinosaur bbq bit! :) JINGLE!!
And that sub fights a dragon, even! And wins!
Perhaps it’s already been revealed and I missed it, but if Kinga is Dr. F’s daughter, who’s her mother? Who is the woman who actually “got with” Dr. F?
What I wanted to hear there was, “Oh no no no, the cruelty is an essential part of the Mesozoic Ranch animal care plan. So come on down and join in the fun!”
“Run Silent, Run Deep”. A real classic with Clark Gable and Burt Lancaster. The characters hated each other. The actors hated each other. The perfect combination. I think Jonah Heston would have watched this one. There are a lot of similarities between the submarine service and the asteroid hauling business.
“Operation Petticoat”. Sort of goofy, but not terrible. The original movie, with Cary Grant and Tony Curtis. I’m pretty sure Jonah brought this one along to watch on that long run between Mars and Ceres. I think that’s why he responded to Kinga’s fake distress call: he had fantasies that he was going to be able to rescue a gaggle of grateful nurses.
Didn’t someone (Joel?) give a joking answer (at least, I assume probably joking) that somehow it was TV’s Frank?
SPOILER ALERT! THIS IS A NON MILLENNIAL REFERENCE. PLEASE REFER TO GOOGLE FOR FURTHER INFORMATION.
Or like the time Soupy Sales, kid show host, was drunk on live TV and told the kids to go into their parent’s wallets and purses and mail him all the green paper they found.
Nessie’s pissed!
Every time they featured a closeup of McClure, I expected someone to say, “Hey, Dexter Morgan is here to cut up and package a dinosaur that did something wrong.”
So at the end of the film, McClure is all “At least I have English Girl with me and she loves me too”
Wait, what?
Throughout the film, I noticed English Girl growing close to U-Boat Captain and in one scene, he even kisses her hand! Which for the time this film takes place, WW1, means you’re practically engaged.
Granted, he dies, but I think McClure is making false assumptions. I think it’s more she’s settling for him because U-Boat Captain and Ahm are dead.
Based on time period and plot, I should really like the 2 McClure movies from this season more than I do. I don’t dislike them, but I keep forgetting they exist. That said, I absolutely LOVE the BBQ jingle. It’s reminiscent of Patton’s Black Angus bit from his first comedy album, but different enough that I enjoy it all on its own.
This kaleidoscope sucks, there’s no color!
I saw this movie straight several years ago, and I remember at the time thinking it was cheesy but competent. Having it turn up here was good for a few laughs, but otherwise it’s not a case of ‘They just didn’t CARE!’ and therefore doesn’t leave as many openings for humor in my view. To make matters worse, the Moon 14 BBQ sketch flew clear over my head because I haven’t had US cable TV for years so any comparison to Buffalo Wild Wings was totally lost on me.
Oh well, I can’t always be the right person getting it.
Fave Riffs
‘We’ll save money on the honeymoon’ you said! ‘We’ll have fun on the boat’ you said! ‘We’ll live on love!’ FEH!
It’s an a capella group! Duck down, maybe they won’t see us!
Well, my ‘pea coat’ just earned it’s name!
It’s a good thing water kills Germans on contact.
It’s either a dinosaur, a crocodile, or a tire.
No, you give oil to the Tin Man, not the Lion!
It appears that the Michael Moorcock listed as a co-writer is the same one who penned those Elric stories.
Anyone else think the squid looked like a modified Servo head?
Favorite riffs
Edgar Rice Burroughs Inc., a division of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle LLC.
“I do not expect anyone to believe the story I’m about to relate.”
So never mind.
“S.S. Montreaux. Twenty thousand tons.”
But it’s a bit sensitive about its weight. So try not to mention it, guys.
“Besides, these were civilians.”
But don’t feel bad. They were jerks, and I like everybody.
“Will they find us?”
Yeah, they’ll find a fat me and a skeleton you.
Row, row, row your boat, gently to our deaths.
I thought I shot you. The movie tricked me, and now I’m dead.
“This boat is now under command of our enemy, Mr. Tyler. You will obey his orders… for the time being.”
Oh sheesh. I should have said that in German. Can I have a do-over?
I’m starting to think this guy doesn’t actually know Morse code.
“We’ve been going due west for six days now.”
We should have fallen off the Earth by now.
Captain’s log. I’m captain again. So why do I feel so empty inside?
That’s where they harvest Paramount Pictures logos.
I saw it first. I name it the Tyler Stinks River.
Some guys have a six pack. McClure, he’s got a keg.
The corporate team-building exercise that time forgot.
Ahm, I know we desecrated some kind of sacred burial ground for your people, but don’t you want to be cool and hang with us?
My dearest Eulabelle, the bloody war between the North and the thunder lizards continues without end. One of the simple local townsfolk has led us deep into enemy territory. I miss toilet paper. Love yours truly, Ambrose.
The Croods Netflix show is so much more violent than the movie was.
Coming up after The Land That Time Forgot, Adrienne Barbeau stars in Swamp Thing.
The land that time forgot to edit.
The cameraman clearly suffers from social anxiety.
Geez, you forget to offer a virgin sacrifice to the volcano one time.
Okay, that’s not CGI. They’re actually throwing fire at Doug McClure.
I’m taking this NCIS fan fiction to Hell with me.
Plot twist, it was Ireland the whole time.
So you’re in a beautiful land of plentiful resources with a hot blonde lady? Boo hoo.
The Land That Time Forgot will return in The Land That Time Forgot 2: The Remembering.
Long-time reader, first-time poster.
This ep is one of my new favorites. Just have to say I think my favorite is the one where Ahm is sawing on something, then he stops and the camera closes in:
(To “Behind Blue Eyes”)
Nobody knows what it’s like, to be a Bo-lu, to be a Ga-lu,
Behind rubber nose.
Helps if you know the original song, “Behind Blue Eyes” by The Who, but it’s brilliant regardless.
JINGLE THIS!
All great host segments, Crow worried about becoming human is actually adorable. But like most (if not everyone) I absolutely love the manic build through the Moon 14 Mesozoic Ranch Dinosaur BBQ bit. Just perfect.
Yeah, they are clearly just hurling real fire. What the hell!? How did they get away with that? Planning and coordinating a controlled explosion is one thing, wild falling fire balls is another. Wild.
One of two problems I have with riffing decisions this entire season starts here with trying to project this jock-esque American meathead characature onto Doug McClure. It honestly just doesn’t work for me. It doesn’t feel mean spirited, and it could be funny, but nothing about his acting or the characters he’s playing actually match to what Jonah and the bots are saying.
I have no idea why, but every time I watch this ep, I lose it for:
Crow: I’ve been working on the railroad. I don’t know what that is.
Well, how many Moorcocks did you expect there to be?
Yeah, I didn’t get that. Was that a reference to “The Lost World”? Or to the fact that they’re both known by three names? If the latter, shouldn’t that have led right into a riff about assassins? Well, whatever.
Were there Stardate riffs? Should there have been?
How’s Dr. Gavin?
“The Land That Time Forgot Two…Remember”
Supposedly, it wasn’t that he was drunk, it’s just that he didn’t expect viewers to take the comment seriously. Per Wikipedia, they mostly sent in only Monopoly money, anyway. ;-)
Also per Wikipedia, when he was suspended for two weeks due to the incident, “young viewers” picketed the TV station. That must have been quite a sight.
We have divergent views on the Mads stealing their invention exchanges this season. On one side we have Kinga correctly pointing out that corporations do it all the time. On the other hand we have Max calling it an Easter Egg. I like Max’s take better. Full disclosure. I have never marathoned this new season and my memory isn’t what it used to be. I never noticed the Mads were stealing their inventions.
I have to ponder Ardy’s comments a bit more. Are his comments of cleaning up the latest Kingachrome spill in his wet/dry vac:
-Simply that the spills are super common?
-Telling us that several back and forth command changes of the sub were cut for time?
-He was surprised to see Reptilicus style dinosaurs show up in The Land That Time Forgot?
-The spill itself was responsible for dinosaurs being in The Land That Time Forgot?
-It’s just a show and I should really just relax?
I’m going to take the middle ground on the BBQ host segment. I really liked it at first but as it went on the writing got thin and it overstayed its welcome.
Max finding Jonah’s bottle message is so good. Once again he channels and nails Frank. This time Kinga gets in on it and does a passble Clayton in her reaction to Max.
That music in the background during the containment ceremony reminds me of a SNL closing.
Favorite Riffs:
Crow as old seaman finding the message in a bottle “There’s got to be an easier way to get my mail.” Gypsy “Yeah before cell phones this was how people communicated. Go out to the ocean and check your messages everyday.”
Bowen “We were the only survivors.” Tom “We better get to repopulating this boat.”
Bowen unrolls a map scroll. Jonah “Well, better rewrite the ole constitution here.”
Ahm makes a break for it. Crow “Hey! Come back and tell us how we can save 50% or more on our car insurance.”
Ardy’s (Joel’s) comments about the Kingachrome…er, stuff…satisfy, I think, two purposes:
1. Notify us that the movie has been cut, and
2. Satisfy Joel’s apparent desire to indulge in weird, gimmick-based worldbuilding.
Honestly, I’d prefer the show NOT call attention to its editing for content/time. Who cares? For the record, the full, uncut Land that blah blah blah contains more sub changes in the (far too long) opening bit before the characters reach the Land that blah blah blah.
It could’ve been worse; they could’ve gone full Tex Antoine on him. Of course, Soupy just pulled a harmless prank; Tex went far past the standards of good taste.
(Okay, I just want to see who gets this reference without looking it up.)
I was just watching Legend of the Dinosaurs the other day, finishing up another rewatch of the K season, and noticed the “Call-Forward” to this episode, too. There were a few other things in Legend of the Dinosaurs that made me realize that if MST3K had stopped at K21, portions of what the show would have gone on to become are hinted at in the finalé.
Servo imitating Doug McClure gives him the Smug W. Bastard he was needing to be *Tom* Servo. (Maybe if he added a little Billy Dee Williams he could be Htom Sirveaux.)
…
Speaking of which, for some reason I think I remember Servo being introduced as “Thomas S. Servo” once, but maybe it’s from one of the few times he was referred to as “Thomas” and I heard it as “Tom S.”
Then why are you here? Why do you plague us so?
How about books to send to Jonah as a weekend topic?
Yet you yourself so clearly care FAR TOO MUCH.
I’m not sure why robots wouldn’t have birthdays. Wouldn’t Gypsy’s birthday be when Joel first activated her? Before that, she just a pile of special parts. Furthermore, Crow’s concern about turning into a human comes out of less than nowhere. It doesn’t even relate to the film. Oh well.
No, a perfect vehicle for a “Hikeeba!” moment would be a forklift…
;-)
I presume that said kids didn’t quite understand that Charlie Brown isn’t real. I think most of us understand that that the character of Jonah Heston isn’t real. Jonah RAY isn’t trapped on a satellite and at least as much access to books as the rest of us.
Why’d they do that, anyway, give him a new last name? They did that with Joel too, but not with Mike. Is there a deeper meaning? Ehh, probably not.
I remember the same thing from The Beginning of the End.
Could the Joel era just not get the rights to the Gamera films that they didn’t riff or did they just decide “oh, enough already, let’s move on”? If the latter, well…
I’m unconvinced that he can do anything without being obnoxious. I acknowledge the possibility, I just don’t find it convincing. I occasionally wonder if all the bile in his system renders him incapable of even the most rudimentary audible communication.
You never know.
Except that he’s already made like Frank Burns after Season 5 of M*A*S*H. If only certain others would do the same.
You mean he was jilted when you married Donald Penobscot??
(Me, I’m more like the Maj. Winchester–Supposed to be the “replacement” Frank Burns, but sticks around to be the nice guy, ’cause I’m too smart to hate, and the scripts start turning snooty and intellectual.)
Lord help me, I actually DID forget that reference. I never thought it would be possible five years ago, but we’ve been blitzed with so many other smugly off-topic Geico meta-advertisement campaigns since then that were more interested in advertising their own smugness and their own running characters than their own product, I actually forgot about the one that got its own spinoff sitcom deal. (We reportedly almost got one for that cute cartoon spy-girl from the E-Surance commercials.) Just shows you the mind’s ability to block out bad memories.
At least we never got one for the two guys with the guitar, or the space captain who lost his keys.
Really? Where have you been doing that? Based on the fact that you seem to think you are yourself funny, I’d have guessed you were literally the last person in here who knew anything about comedy.
Or are you saying you’re speaking ON BEHALF of “someone who’s beein fighting the lone solo Good Fight in the name of quality comedy for years”? That would be more believable.
You can…hear us? Do the voices come directly from your screen or from…somewhere else?
“Tell us more, tell us more…”
I invite long-time visitors to this site to think about the obvious jokes that this quotation all but demands.
Voice still needs to be a bit deeper, though. IMHO.
Sort of, but it wasn’t quite as…well, the only even nearly appropriate word coming to mind at the moment is “homey.”
Clay & Lar’s had a sort of small-town feel to it (understandable, since it was back in Season 1 when the “cowtown puppet show” was still in an early stage of its evolution); you could believe it was a business set up by two friends, the proverbial “little guys” with big dreams. It was low-budget because THE SHOW was low-budget.
IMHO Mesozoic Ranch Dinosaur BBQ was overly dramatic, bigger than life…and trying way too hard. With Moon 13’s huge staff and its supposed state-of-the-art ranches, it began with the presumption of huge success so there was really nowhere for it to go. It had the bells and whistles that Clay & Lar’s lacked and those very bells and whistles detracted from it. IMHO.
Kinga thinks BIG…whether it’s called for or not.
IMHO a contrast of the two businesses is, in a way, a near-perfect analogy of a contrast between the two incarnations of the show and an even better one between Dr. F and Kinga. Just because you can have lots of extras due to your bigger budget, it doesn’t necessarily mean that you should. :-)
My husband and I both feel like the song is a parody/reference either of a specific song, or at least a style parody of a particular singer, but neither of us has a clue about country so we can’t pin it down. Anyone?
ADDENDUM TO EARLIER REMARK
Of course, the Brains may have passed on, specifically, “Gamera vs. Jiger” not because they couldn’t get the rights to it but because of the standards they set themselves after “The Sidehackers.”
FOLLOW-UP TO MYSELF
I’m guessing that Sales didn’t expect his request to be taken seriously because the television industry was slow to realize the full power it could exert upon the public (today it’s hard to imagine TV shows that were watched by almost literally every child in the USA, a time when nearly every bar in the country had its TV tuned to “I Love Lucy” (at, you know, the appropriate airtime)).
After “Howdy Doody” introduced the Flub-a-Dub, a creature who ate flowers, the show makers were reportedly astonished when their AUDIENCE started eating flowers in imitation. As one might guess, parental discontent rose to alarming levels, and the Flub-a-Dub’s preferred food was quickly changed to spaghetti and meatballs. Or such is my understanding.
OFF-TOPIC_OFF-TOPIC_OFF-TOPIC
Anyone else think the NuBrains should take a crack at “Child Bride,” the film known for (among other things) being “famously” rejected by the TruBrains? They’d just need to promise themselves to limit their “oh come on this is just too gross”-style riffs to, well, a few.
Besides, IMHO Angelo Rossitto should have more MST3K representation than just “The Corpse Vanishes” (and, more distantly, “Brain of Blood” at Cinematic Titanic).
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Angelo_Rossitto
For that matter, I think there’s supposed to be, somewhere, a list of the movies that the TruBrains rejected for various reasons. Those should totally be considered.
Of course, I personally have no clue as to where this fabled list might be found but I’m sure that the Brains themselves know since it’s, you know, their list and all.
Also, since Rifftrax has been re-doing MSTed movies, I see no reason that MST3K can’t re-do Rifftraxxed movies. At least it wouldn’t be the identical set of voices. ;-)
This concludes OFF-TOPIC_OFF-TOPIC_OFF-TOPIC
We already had Kim Possible, but Erin Esurance managed to eke out some epic commercials that had even less to do with insurance than her usual stuff, including a Bollywood-style thing. She also inspired an equally epic porn parody, and that was when Esurance decided to retire the character.
Submarine movies? Has anyone mentioned Fer-de-Lance (1974) yet? It was the original “snakes on a ______” movie.
Even if the Dino jingle is referencing something, you still don’t need to know what it is in order to enjoy it. It’s a parody of an obnoxious in your face commercial jingle, what’s not to get?
I actually tracked down a VHS copy of “Fer-De-Lance” a while back. It would be a perfect MSTed movie. Strangely enough, the characters in this little-known TV movie are actually more intelligent than the characters in the big-budget “Snakes on a Plane”, including Samuel L. Jackson. (But don’t tell him that.)
This is the first clunker episode of the season, I’ve watched this one a few times and it just doesn’t work for me. The movie is kind of a drag until they get to the Land That Time Forgot, things come alive with all those goofy looking dinosaurs “boing”-ing about, but even then, the riffing never really catches fire. Add into that some middle of the road Host Segments and you got one of my least favorite episode of the season.
The reveal that The Mads are stealing their inventions for the Invention Exchange from Jonah and The Bots is fine, I like it. “It’s not a crime, it’s an easter egg!”
The stuff with Artie and the Kingachrome and the cut scenes starts to give us an idea of what the Kingachrome is and how(?) it works.
Host Segment #1 falls flat, but I like the design of the robo-squid. “My mistake!”
HS#2 with the Dino BBQ goes on WAY too long, but does offer “the meal that bland forgot” and the diddy “never should’ve tampered in God’s domain, MOOON 14!!”
HS#3 reminds me of an old school MST skit, with Crow wanting to turn human. Also, love when Jonah comes back for his book. “Oh, my Grisham!”
RIFFS:
movie: “We’re the only survivors.”
Servo: “We better get to repopulating this boat.”
movie: “You don’t know how deep it is here.”
Crow: “Radiohead deep.”
Jonah: “I love it when you get to the beach and there’s no one there yet.”
Jonah: “Must’ve had chili in his pockets.”
Crow: “Have you head the good word… about me eating you??”
Crow: “Jim Henson’s Lou Ferrigno Babies.”
Crow: “Shoot him, he’s the evil clone!”
Jonah: “No I’m not! Shoot him!”
Crow: “Oh, now he want’s a tip.”
Servo: “Let’s bum rush these dickweeds.”
Jonah: “Watch out for snakes!”
Gypsy: “Armageddon tired of this.”
—
—
Gypsy really nails it with that last riff.
Not one of their better efforts this season.
I give it only 2 out of 5 Doug McClures.
I’m probably not giving you nearly enough credit and I apologize for that, but I’m wondering if it’s remotely possible that you didn’t “get it.”
“how many…more…?”
I thought it was a typical example of an obnoxious in-your-face commercial jingle…
caveman riff shortly after the cave drawings scene
“These are trees, and these are trees, and c’mon, I show you bush.”
“I BEG YOUR PARDON?!”
riff from episode: “Much longer, those dinosaurs will evolve into birds and fly away.”
Take it, Morbo:
“Evolution Does Not Work That Way!”
;-)
I like this episode more every time I see it. I even get pulled in to the movie a bit. I’m loving the new season.
Good thing this wasn’t about a World War II submarine crew, the filmmakers would never have been able to sell such a crew as even moderately sympathetic characters. Admittedly, I’m not positive that being evil scum was an actual requirement of serving in the German Armed Forces during WWII but hey, why go looking for trouble?
“a race of fish-McClures”
Shouldn’t there have been a riff about “A Fish Called Selma”? Or would focusing on a single episode of The Simpsons have been considered too…obscure?
“Is that [dinosaur] endangered?”
“Oh yeah, last of its kind. Its sweat cure cancer.”
Strange that none of the kazillion ripoffs of Jurassic Park ever took focused on that concept. Unless I’m wrong, of course.
Regarding Yakkity Sax, I recall a Closing (although not the episode it was in) when a letter writer refers to Great Britain thusly: “But, then, what do you expect from a country that gave us Benny Hill?” Joel and the Bots protest that Great Britain also gave us Monty Python but they seem to concur that Benny Hill is indeed a mark against the British. So there’s that, anyway. If Original EricJ (the J is for “Joel,” right?) is a proponent of Yakkity Sax, he might want to rethink that position. Or he might not.
No one’s taking the bait, huh? Oh well.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gamera_vs._Jiger
I am sure this has been left before, but MY main problem with this episode was the extensive cutting of the film to fit Joel’s arbitrary time limits. It made following the story action difficult for new viewers. In a lot of cases editing the film helps the show. That was not the case here.