Movie: (1964) Teeners in a beach community are oblivious when dumped radioactive waste creates a batch of monsters.
First shown: 9/6/97
Opening: Tom harmonizes his overtones with the fundamental
Intro: Servo’s “fundamental” turns out to be pre-recorded; meanwhile “Apearlo” and “Brainguyus” settle in with a delighted Callipygeas and suspicious Flavia
Host segment 1:The manly beach dance is postponed because Mike’s trunks are a bit small
Host segment 2: Apearlo & Brainguyus’ jam becomes a beef commercial
Host segment 3:Tom’s a newsy with very up-to-date news
End: M&TB sing “Sodium;” meanwhile as Callipygeas and Brainguyus bond, Apearlo and Flavia trade…er…pleasantries
Stinger: A less-than-manly beach dance
(270 votes, average: 4.71 out of 5)
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• I was generally a fan of the “chase through time and space” thing in season eight, and I contend that more host segments worked than didn’t. But when it comes to the “Roman times,” story arc we’re now into, well, for me, not so much. Everybody tries real hard, and I bet it seemed funny in the writing room, but many of the Roman Times host segments just don’t come up to the level I expect from this show. Call it the exception that proves the generally witty and hilarious rule. Fortunately it only lasted a few episodes, and fortunately for this episode, the goofy movie, and the terrific riffing of it, more than make up for any shortcomings elsewhere.
• Paul’s take is here.
• This episode was included in Shout’s Mystery Science Theater 3000: Volume XXXVII
• References.
• Crow is referred to as a “golden spider duck”—that sounds like something that was in a fan letter, though I don’t think they ever said that.
• One reference the reference guide doesn’t note: Observer mentions “Bitter Dregs,” during segment 2. He’s referring to tune sung in the Star Trek episode “Plato’s Stepchildren.” Watch it here.
• During that bit, they eventually begin playing Aaron Copeland’s “Rodeo,” and Kevin yells “Beef!” That’s a reference to the now-largely-forgotten “Beef. It’s What’s for Dinner” commercial campaign that featured that Copeland piece.
• By the way, the music is actually being played by Lisa Fuglie (of the group Monroe Crossing) and Karen Mueller.
• Movie comments: Did the makers of this movie really think the monsters would look scary? Really? Also: The voice of our heroine Elaine is dubbed. But I’ve never heard an explanation as to why.
• When this movie was in theaters, movie-goers had to sign a “fright release” before they entered the theater.
• I hadn’t seen this one for a while, and I’d forgotten Eulabelle. Wow. Were these kinds of characters really still acceptable in 1964?
• The movie was filmed in the Stamford, Conn. area, (although it has some very nice shots of 1964-era Manhattan, when our hero makes his Sodium run).
• According to this bio, the Del-Aires broke up not long after shooting this movie.
• This movie “was billed as ‘the first horror musical,’ but we MSTies know better. The similarly-hyped 812-THE INCREDIBLY STRANGE CREATURES WHO STOPPED LIVING AND BECAME MIXED-UP ZOMBIES was released the year before.”
• The great “Sodium” song has one extra joke connected with it—check out the credits where the song’s “lyric” is credited.
• No cast and crew roundup: Nobody involved in this movie worked on any other MST3K movie.
• CreditsWatch: Produced by Jim, directed by Kevin. With this episode Patrick is added to the “Set Design” credit and he will be there for the rest of the run of the series. A Jennifer Turner helped Andrea with hair and makeup. Intern Joseph Olson finished up a four-episode stint. This is the last episode that “The authors of the First Amendment” would be thanked at the end of the credits.
• Fave line: “Look Polish, everyone!” Honorable mention: “Do farts have lumps?” “I had a generally positive impression of white people before this movie.”
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They clearly filmed over several months, and I guessed they figured no one would notice (or care).
Another thing I always thought was odd was the casting choice of Dr. Gavin’s daughter Elaine, whose performance must have been so poor as to apparently needed dubbing to cover it, when the actor’s real life daughter was assigned a different role in the movie (she played the least unattractive of the women from New York). It seems like she would have been a better choice as Elaine and probably would have had more natural interactions with her dad. Perhaps the studio insisted on a blonde for the lead role?
I nearly forgot! We get to witness another delightful misuse of Carbon-14 testing in this film. Apparently in addition to detecting objects from the future, 14C testing can be used on fresh crime scene specimens to identify the DNA sequences of killer monsters.
It’s the sodium song that ends with Mike (or is it Crow?) going into a rant about these kids today with their: colored chalk, Neve Campbells, VW Golf leases, No Doubts….and on and on…right? I use that one all the time.
I like the two “Southern gentleman” riffs that they do when Hank says hello.
“Just rode in from Richmond.”
“Just arrived on the riverboat.”
“I’m back from Bull Run.”
Another movie with a Romulan girl. How many movies that make it for MST3K? There’s this one and the short “Are You Ready for Marriage?” I think there is at least one more.
I like the Roman Times segments in this episode. I don’t care for the later one, especially when everyone is fawning over Bobo. I do like the last one, though. The real bright spot in these is Bridget Jones as Flavia. I think she is the most versatile of Brains to guest star as a character on the show.
The monsters in this movie are just the goofiest look things. Did the designer not want his monster to be compared to the Gill Man? Is that why he didn’t stick with a simple fish mouth and went with the mouthful of pickles?
What is the deal with movie bikers? They are always dressed so inappropriately for the beach. Is it a sign of their toughness that they can stand to wear leather jackets in the hot sun?
I also found myself falling in love with the Del-Aires after watching this episode, and have since tracked down everything they put out. I believe they have something like 4 singles to their name. Lead singer Ron “My skull!” Linaires later formed a band whose name escapes me at the moment…something like “Queen’s Nectarine Dream Machine.” I know of at least one LP that came from this project.
A soundtrack was never officially released, but has been rumored to have existed. Norton Records (http://www.nortonrecords.com/) was supposed to release a Del-Aires CD, but haven’t done so yet.
I’d just like to brag(?) that as a result of this movie, I am the proud owner of 2 Del-Aires 45s.
I also found myself falling in love with the Del-Aires after watching this episode, and have since tracked down everything they put out.
Ooh, gentlemen, I am impressed!
Similarly, it was thanks to MST that the Gummo household fell in love with Arch Hall, Jr. — we not only own all of his movies, we have a CD put out a few years ago that collects all of his music — except, inexplicably, the wonderful ballad from Eegah, “If I had/a million dollars…”
Well, we pulled out this episode for a viewing last night and laughed as hard as ever. And it reinforced my partiality to the Roman Times segments — they’re very funny! Any chance to see Kevin is welcome and I bet he was thrilled to get on camera WITHOUT the Bobo makeup; and the stereotypical feminine sniping between Flavia and A-pearl-o is hysterical. “Golden spider duck” and “squat crimson pig”? C’mon!
#104: re. Romulan girls:
514 (Teenage Strangler) – Liz in the short “IS THIS LOVE?”
#104 k re. Romulan girls.
Also in Girls Town – Gloria Talbot and henchwoman are dubbed Romulans.
This one’s good, and Spinal Tap references are always welcome (“oh how they danced, the children of stonehenge”). The brains seem to have been slow on the concept that while sodium was the right weapon, they needed something else for TRACKING the monsters. No weapon is good if you can’t find your target, especially a moving target that can walk and swim. That reference to hot dog buns after a booty shot-I just don’t see the connection. :???:
This will always be one of my favourite episodes, since it was the first actual episode I saw after seeing the Movie. And while I realize some don’t dig the Roman Times host segments, I like them, especially this first set. I laugh out loud every time Apearlo and Brainguyus start playing “Seasons in the Sun.” :smile: And Kevin and Bridget are perfect as Callipygeas and Flavia. (I love watching her mouth the “conquered grapes” joke while Callipygeas tells it, since she’s obviously heard it a million times. And I love Kevin’s deep “Roman” voice.)
As for the actual episode, one of my favourite moments occurs when the bikers say in unison, “I think she likes us.” :smile:
Is that the Coke commercial where the little brother keeps telling his dad “I told my dame id ‘D’!”
Or something like that?
I can’t type…
“I told you my name is ‘D’!”
This episode is very funny, but the best thing about is the Bill Corbett line –
“It’s my Oscar Gamble doll!”
Best riff of the episode.
Who’s Oscar Gamble, you ask?
Check him out here if you are too lazy to type his name into a google image search.
http://dkpresents.wordpress.com/2009/07/14/doubleshot-tuesday-oscar-gamblebilly-ripken/
>>>514 (Teenage Strangler) – Liz in the short “IS THIS LOVE?”
Apropos of nothing, the jokes about Liz’s age were sort of pointless (if the word really applies to anything about MST3K), since the actress didn’t have to be young to portray a college student, since one doesn’t actually have to BE YOUNG to attend college. Of course, MST3K is *FAR* from the only TV show/movie to not get that.
This is one episode that I hadn’t seen in a long time. I believe I caught this one when it first aired. I do remember watching it, and my mom came in, saw the creature, did a double take and said, “My god, I saw this movie in the drive in.” She then left the room in a hurry.
I hadn’t seen it since then, but I think I remembered it as being a lot funnier than it was. This is another movie that has a funny beginning, slow middle and funny ending, making it a bit uneven with the riffing.
Still the host segments are entertaining, and the creatures are so goofy looking that you can’t help but laugh when they are on screen. For me a 3 and a half star episode.
Of course, everyone knows that Callipygeas is Latin for “nice ass”, right?
Am I the only person to find Bridget kinda foxy in her Roman getup?
I just assumed most of us did.
Anyone else find it nice and ironic that way back when, the ‘bots wished the fight amongst the Merry Wives of “MANOS” had been ‘shirts vs. skins’…and here they finally, technically, get such a fight within the first 20 minutes and it’s part of the most horrific scene ever? An even more devious twist than Pearl sending up that Second Spider Invasion if you ask me.
And has no one commented on the oddness of the bikers using teamwork to battering-ram their leader head-first into our hero for a finishing move?
“Wait, hold on guys, I’m not sure this is such a great idea anymore, maybe we should– AAUUUGH! GOD! MY SPINE…”
for me the manly dance bit with Mike’s micro suit makes this episode a great one. and while not related to men’s swim suits, i’ve had more than a few “part of me will never be back” moments in my life.
I’m an older school Comedy Central fan of the show that discovered it during season four. Then during season six I went away to college to a non-Comedy Central market and saw an episode here and an episode there for several years until I lost track of the show when I graduated and got my first place with no cable or Internet at all. I was at a girlfriends place and stumbled on this episode doing some channel surfing. Of course I was confused by it being on the “wrong” channel and the lack of Deep 13 really threw me. But I had rediscovered my favorite show and life was good.
Tom has a great line after Mike unplugs all his “transcendent” speakers when he says “Look! A huge distracting thing” and runs off.
Mary Jo does a great job creating their god names in that completely unconvincing delivery. Bill’s reaction is priceless. “Brainguyus. How imaginative.” Then Mike and the Bots confab on what godlike proof Brainguyus can produce. That little huddle has a very Family Feud feel to it. Finally Mike caps it off with great gloating over Flavia finding average.
My favorite Spinal Tap riff of the episode was “original soundtrack by Nigel Tuffnel” as it so perfectly references his guitar solo of the movie.
Who does the better sell job in the beach dance host segment? The contenders are Mike when actually dancing or Crow stating, “part of me will never be back.”
Love the music jam host segment as well. I think of this as pre-cursor to Mike’s Rifftrax of Road House.
The newsy segment is probably the weakest but still worth a grin.
I seem to remember from eighth grade science class you’re not supposed to handle sodium bare handed.
From the department of redundancy department comes this Crow quote: “The shocking lack of sodium being taught in the schools today is shocking.”
I love this episode!
Favorite Riffs:
Tina “I never needed you and I never will.” Tom “They wrote their own vows.”
The toxic wasted is dumped into the sea. Crow “Oh it’s an Exxon training film”
Crow as a beret wearing biker “It made sense to surrender. The Germans were very very mean.”
Crow about Tina “She could use a few inhibitions. It would do here good.”
Mike as a little girl extra in the beach background “I can’t get this beer open.”
“Well no weather is good for a funeral. In my business I try to avoid them.” Mike “Too bad I’m an undertaker.”
Dr Gavin “I have no doubt we’ll find a perfectly reasonable explanation for the girls death.” Tom “Like giant squirrels.”
Mike on Eulabelle “She’s got Dilbert’s boss’ hair.”
Mike as Elaine “I’d say something but the guy who dubs me is on break.”
As Hank drives back with the sodium Crow sings “Mrs. Robinson.”
Elaine hops on her one good leg after her accident. Crow “Oh great and I’ve got that ass kicking contest today too.” [This one kills me every time.]
Tom “Meanwhile yesterday afternoon.”
Another in a long line of great episodes. 5/5. The goofy pickle eating monster, the fact that Eulabelle, the stereotypical servant, is the only one who actually gets anyone to advance the plot, the main character getting a southern accent when he talks to her… All create a goofy good episode. I’m another who think the Del-Aires weren’t bad. Did “Elaine” the song come first and inspire the character’s name or was it the other way around? I know some of their songs were written for the movie. Originally, the head biker guy was going to have a bigger part, but was injured in a accident and the rest of his part was cut. Oh, and Sodium, won’t you?
Servo(as Hank): Any news on the War Of Northern Aggression, Eulabelle?
Crow(as Hank): Just rode in from Richmond.
Mike: Just arrived on the riverboat.”
Mike: I’m back from Bull Run.
Servo: Look Polish?”
Crow: Maybe it means, “Look! Polish!”
. . .
Mike: Quick, Look Polish everyone!
Servo (As the nerdy Del-Aires sing): Never touched a woman. We make the saints cry.
Singer of the Del-Aires does a loud wail and his eyes roll to the back of his head.
Crow (As singer): My skull!
Elaine: I don’t go to slumber parties any more…
Mike: …now that I’m in my 40?s
Crow (as drunk): Do farts have lumps?
mikek #104: I like the two “Southern gentleman” riffs that they do when Hank says hello.
“Just rode in from Richmond.”
“Just arrived on the riverboat.”
“I’m back from Bull Run.”
Except a Southern gentleman wouldn’t call it Bull Run, but rather Manassas.
A quick review of IMDB reveals that no one involved in this “film” had much of a resume. Anyone’s guess where they got the cast.
Favorite Lines:
Horror at Public Beach. Crappy movie parking here.
[Dumping waste barrels] Oh, it’s an Exxon training film.
Just another day at Love Canal.
You know I’ve seen so much horror at party beach I’m just inured to it at this point.
I know how it is though, the first thing in the morning I like to move a big log too.
[Monster] A creature whose face is 80 percent eyebag. So radiation has a sense of humor. Lloyd Bridges has not aged well.
[Hank/John Scott] James Franciscus is not pleased.
[Tina] She uses the Art Garfunkel hair care system.
[Panic on Beach] Look out Ted Kennedy is driving home.
[Elaine] I don’t like slumber parties now that I’m in my 40’s.
[Eulabelle] She’s got Dilbert’s bosses’ hair.
Yes, the sweeping majesty of young white Republican love.
[two drunks] Otis of Mayberry had a quiet dignity compared to these guys.
[Sodium] Have they tried throwing Campbell’s soup? That has a lot of sodium in it. He could have used Hormel Chili or some Dinty Moore, there’s a lot of sodium in that.
[Monster burning] My Richard Pryor impression.
Final Thought: A fine example of Connecticut’s film industry in the 60s. I give this one 3 out of 5 stars.
I’ve re-watched this one several times since last time and have changed my favorite riff:
Mike: “Vladimir and Estragon, The Sitcom!”
Have never seen Waiting for Godot and yet I still got that without looking at a reference sheet.
One of my favorite eps from my favorite season. Where to begin. The movie’s JUST…..SO…..WEIRD. There’s the hot dog stuffed monster, Elaines dubbed voice. look polish, and of course, Elaines rather (ahem) unusual way to convey pain. I still crack up every time Mike goes into his toenails rant. And Mikes bathing suit (he may want to go up a size). I bet I’ve seen this one two dozen times. I probably have every Del-Aires song in the movie memorized!
Set of doubles anyone?
How many more people will die if I do a little sightseeing?
Great episode! I enjoy all the Roman times host segments. Kevin’s over-acting is always a pleasure to watch.
One thing that occurred to me, did Hardware Hank specifically request that the sodium be packed into little gift bags, or do chemical supply companies normally pack their products that way? Did they assume he was having a sodium party? Maybe a themed sodium party where everyone looks polish?
@60 Mysteryman– I noticed that too, though I had forgotten which Hartnell episode of Doctor Who I heard it on. I just watched the Patrick Troughton episode ‘The Moonbase’, and you can hear almost the entire soundtrack from ‘Horror of Party Beach’ there (minus the Del Aires). Most notably, the goofy theme that plays near the end when they’re hurling their sodium gift bags at the monsters (actually, wasn’t it every time the monsters attacked?).
Yet another great season 8 ep! This movie is so fun and goofy, I could probably watch it unriffed. It came out the before I was born, back when we could laugh at drunk driving. Having grown up in the south, I’ve known people like Eulabelle, although it’s pretty weird to see her up in Connecticut. That moment at the very end where we hear (presumably) Elaine limping in pain offscreen always catches me by surprise and it never fails to make me laugh hard.
Another 5 stars for me. I plan to spend the entire day looking Polish in honor of this one.
Another moment in the movie that cracks me up: several beefy guys come out of nowhere to break up the fight, then they immediately move back into the crowd, I’m guessing to get out of the way of the cameras.
One of my favorite episodes from that season and of the whole series.Lots of great riffs,though the host segments,especially the ones in Rome are just so so..Here’s some trivia about the movie: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0058208/trivia?ref_=tt_trv_trv Hope Shout puts this one on a future box set..
I live in Stamford, CT where this was filmed….still go to West Beach where the disturbing “dancing” took place…My wife’s girlfriend’s father was in the motorcycle gang.
I closely guard my VHS copy…hopefully this will see DVD release soon.
I consider this to be a good-not-great episode, one that is pretty much saved by the all around weirdness and schlockiness of the movie. I mean really, these monsters, the wacky science behind them, the beach party, the beach fight, the slumber party, Eulabelle, the two drunks, the sodium trip in NYC, your dad was badly burned but he’ll be okay, all this stuff makes the movie very oddball and watchable (to a point). The riffing is pretty good, maybe not one of their best efforts, but still good.
The Host Segments are the weakest elements that really drag this one down for me. Host Segment #1 is kinda okay (“Is it the dancing?”) and the ending segment with the Sodium song is the best out-of-theater moment this episode, but the rest are super weak. The opening with Servo’s chanting, the lame visit to Roman Times with Pearl and Brain Guy’s song in HS#2, and the Extra, Extra bit in HS#3. . . none of these are really that good, although HS#3 is still better than the entire movie Newsies..
Yeah, Roman Times. . . .I’m going to try to keep an open mind as I rewatch these episodes over the next few weeks, but it still seems like the low point for an uneven Season 8 (as far as the Host Segments go). Sure, Kevin puts in a spirited performance and Bridget as Flavia is great, it’s just that there aren’t really any laughs to be had in this episode. I guess when Kevin “accidentally” slaps Bridget in the face is kind of funny, but that’s about it. . . .. .
I do love Flavia calling Crow and Servo a “golden spider duck” and “squat crimson pig,” respectively, and how incensed Crow gets about it.
–
RIFFS:
Crow: “SAIIIL AWAAAY!”
Crow: “You know, come to think of it, the ocean really sucks.”
Crow: “Is there anyone who likes pickles as much as I do?”
Servo: “So radiation has a sense of humor…”
Crow: “Hang on, let me toss a gay guy at you.”
Servo: “Batch Man!”
Crow: “My skull!!”
Crow: “I had a generally favorable opinion of white people before this movie.”
movie: “What’s the fastest way to New York?”
Servo: “Rocket car.”
Mike: “Look Polish?”
movie: “Of course..”
Servo: “I’m high.”
Mike: “Director bravely mixes tedium with unscariness.”
closeup of the guy with clawed up face,
Crow: “Couldn’t get his contacts out.”
Servo: “My Richard Pryor impersonation!”
Mike: “End movie. It’s not ending enough!”
–
This movie feels like and odd cousin to Attack of the the Eye Creatures and/or of the Giant Leeches,
although I like those two episode better.
–
The Horror of Party Beach,
….
wipeout.
3/5
One of the very best episodes from my favorite season. The beach party sequence has to be about the funniest thing that has ever been on television. When servo says “Scott Scrawny, and the hard gainers” I lose it. And every time I watch this one I become more and more convinced that the Del-Aires were a fun little band, if we just take the time to listen to them.
Also, I work in a vet hospital and whenever I sweep up after doing a nail trim on a dog I am tempted to say “look at all the toenails, so many toenails. Doesn’t even have this many toes.” But thus far I have just said it too myself and smiled. They think I’m weird enough as is
So 5 star episode easy. most of this part of season 8 is too me, except the next episode.
“And all the flesh slipped off my skull!”
A riff explained (sort of): Crow makes a crack about hiway ramp meters solving the monster problems. Around the time the Twin Cities started implementing metered ramps on interstates, with the proclamation that they would solve traffic problems and make things smoother. That hasn’t quite happened, but don’t tell MnDOT that.
I just assumed that “Resusci-Annie” (cruel, but fair) found out that all the characters’ voices were coming out sounding like they were recorded in the basement pool at the Y, and somehow had enough clout to demand that her lines be re-dubbed in a real recording studio by professional sound engineers.
I maintain that this is one of the single stupidest movies MST3K ever did. The level of not caring that went into the production of this film makes Attack of the The Eye Creatures look like The Magic Voyage of Sinbad. Every single thing in this movie is wrong. The monsters aren’t scary, the acting is atrocious, the characters are all idiots, there’s no story whatsoever, the music is annoying…hell, even the set design is dumb (“Look Polish”, anyone?). This is the kind of movie that MST3K was made for.
The guys seem kind of listless at times in the theater this week. Sort of quiet and groggy, like maybe they shot this one at five o’clock in the morning or something. This was right after “The Making of MST3K” and the first Summer Blockbuster Review, so maybe doing two specials in a row screwed up the Brains’ shooting schedule. Just a theory. (I have a lot of those, it seems.) But the riffing still slays. “I had a generally favorable opinion of white people before this movie…”
“Apparently, radiation has a sense of humor.”
“Is there anybody who loves pickles as much as I do?”
“A creature whose face is 80% eyebag.”
“COOKIE!”
“Hot dogs, get your hot dogs here!”
“Don’t even know what panties are, yet they feel compelled to raid.”
The monsters themselves seem to get the funniest riffs in this one. We’ve seen dumb monster costumes before, but these are in a league of their own, no doubt about it. When those things come lumbering over the hill and Mike and the bots start singing the Oompa-Loompa song, I swear I lose it every time. :D
Last year, I did a drawing inspired by this episode and posted it to one of my DeviantArt accounts: http://underwatertoons.deviantart.com/art/Everybody-Do-The-Zombie-Stomp-302688377 That thrill-seeking Marisa Tomei-lookalike is just yet another in the long frustrating line of really cute girls in MSTed movies who get brutally murdered for no reason. She’s looking down from B-movie heaven along with Carrie (she’s so very), Rita (meter maid), and half the characters Beverly Garland ever played. I think Mike and the bots have a point about a lot of movie directors having issues with women.
Mike’s Ken-doll swim trunks with the tiny plastic hanger…my favorite part of the host segments.
I rather like the New Yawk girls. Especially the blond driver. “Imagine…being that thirsty.” What fun it would be to take a road trip with them; if it weren’t for that flat tire and the monsters, they were bound to get hopelessly lost on the way to New Yawk.
I love the guy cracking up at his own bathing beauty punchline: “I don’t know, I never bathed one!” Yeah, buddy, great joke. Humor of the 1840s. ;)
Tom: Help! We’re cut-outs! (And that couple really did look like cut-outs!)
Anyway! I give it a B+.
One of my favorite lines is, “Move your feet, you load!” which I always say if I have to vacuum around someone.
Check out this link for a video on how sodium reacts in water. Pretty spectacular “in the glorious days before environmental impact statements”.
So the Noo Yawk girls didn’t get dubbed (apparently) but Elaine was? I always wondered if they dubbed her because she doesn’t appear to have lips. Or not.
Since “Look Polish” appears on the sign right under “Prime Meats” I’d go with the Polish sausage explanation.
If you like the Del-Aires, Amazon MP3 started selling a compilation of their music, “Zombie Stomp”, a few months back. Limited audio fidelity, but I’ve enjoyed it. Listen to the album and you’ll be mentally transported into the movie :)
I watched this film the first time I hung out with my friend Jason. We got bubble tea & went back to his dorm to watch a taped copy that got squiggly in parts. It’s too bad it wasn’t a date, because it was the best one I’ve ever been on. One of my happiest memories of a guy who would later go on to break my heart in the way only a dear friend can.
“I think it’s just the dancing…” is a phrase that got thrown around a lot between my sister Hilary and I, accompanied by, of course, some awkward Mike-esq “dancing” (if you can call it that). I love the way Crow announces, “Mike, you’re nude.” She even made me a very tight, very short belly shirt with “Try the next size up” written in fabric marker in very tiny print.
So Blandman takes his girlfriend to a beach party so he can lecture her about life being about more than just having fun. Deepok Chopra and Jean-Paul Sartre arrive with their motorcycle gang. A pointless if creative fight breaks out when the disgruntled girlfriend flirts with Deepok, but it end with Blandman and Deepok earning each others respect and mutually dumping the girlfriend. Perhaps so they can see each other. Meanwhile some guys in a boat are dumping radioactive waste within sight of the beach party. The ironclad casks land on a shipwreck(?) and immediately rupture, spewing a substance that immediately mutates microscopic sea life that congeals around the skeletonized remains of the sailors/pirates(?) in an approximation of human physiology that resembles a 3rd rate Creature from the Black Lagoon that went berserk at a hotdog eating contest. Eventually Blandman and his dad decide that only sodium can dry out the wet monsters. Which makes me feel stupid for all the years I put my clothes in the dryer after washing instead of throwing sodium at them since apparently sodium is the only thing that can cause dehydration. I don’t think an alchemist could the science in this movie seriously.
I always wonder about the shipwreck. What is the story behind it? And I wish the bikers had stuck around to fight the monsters. Did that headbutt have anything to do with the injury that sidelined them?
That’s supposed to be “I don’t think an alchemist could TAKE the science in this movie seriously”.
I’d have to take another gander at the episode–and why not?–but it’s also possible that “Look polish” refers to Look Magazine (which existed as a competitor to Life Magazine) and/or nail polish. A Random List of Items We Sell Here!
It’s also entirely possible that the sign DOES refer to Polish sausage, and was trying to warn the drunks; “LOOK OUT, POLISH SAUSAGE-MOUTHED MONSTERS BEHIND YOU!” But it was…too late.
Hey, Hollywood! Since you’re so damn busy “rebooting” everything, why don’t you knock off the “Sharknado/Barracudacane/Piranhailstorm” nonsense for ten seconds and remake HoPB? (And no, rapey-sick “Humanoids From the Deep” doesn’t count, ew, shutup shutup.) And keep it set in the same time period! Because now I really do want to see the greaser punks have a switchblade rumble with the Horrors.
In fact, see if you get Pam Grier to play the remake’s hero–Eulabelle Jones. “I’m tired of cleanin’ up your damn messes, Professor! You! Zombie! (*fires bazooka*) Have some SODIUM!!”
Sure, all radiation is dangerous eventually, but ours does massive damage in a matter of seconds!
I’ve been waiting and waiting for this one to come up in the discussion rotation because I think it was with this episode that my MSTie-ness was solidified. It was the first I remember seeing almost complete (I think the first time I caught it I missed the opening segment and the movie’s credits), and it had a lasting impression. Perhaps it was the mix of the on-point riffing with the (for me) surprising amount of gore. This is before we even get to Eulabelle. Sure, this was still *just* before such performances became strictly the stuff of satire, but to see this performed straight in 1964 still raises my eyebrows.
Nevertheless, this was I think the seminal episode for me that, more than any other, made me the fan I am today.
Fave riffs
Nude driving, a new fad among the teens!
[Kid watching gang arrive at the beach]
Save your money, the band bites!
[of the Del-Aires]
Isn’t there a union rule that says they HAVE to take a break?
[Doctor takes sample from police]
Heh heh, this is going straight up my nose!
[of Elaine]
Like a blank tape… never even cracked the seal…
The Horror of Party Beach passes the Bechdel Test. The slumber party attendees speculate on what’s happening outside. The road trippers comment on the town’s woes. Eulabelle and Elaine talk about voodoo.
In the Golden Turkey Awards series, The Horror of Party Beach was nominated for Worst Beach Party Movie Ever Made, which it won.
I forgot to mention it in the post show discussion for the Rifftrax Live Summer Shorts, but I loved that HoPB monster cosplayer who was in line at the Belcourt.
In HS3, there are two filler article titles that recur in each edition which tackle the ever popular topics of taxes and building codes. The first one says, “Letters of support pour in for new tax.” Must be a tax directed at a highly unpopular group. The other said, “Building code delayed by…” and I couldn’t make out the last word.
Well he was drunk.
FWIW The Space Museum is, if not the worst serial of the Hartnell era, then certainly in the Bottom Five.
It was Crow.
Favorite riffs
Original soundtrack not available. You’ll thank us.
Hi. On behalf of fish everywhere, I hope you’re enjoying the picture.
Most radiation is harmful eventually, but ours does massive damage in a matter of seconds.
It made sense to surrender. The Germans were very, very mean.
Music by The My Three Sons.
Back off, or my gang will ram me in your stomach again.
“Now that’s ridiculous, Eulabelle. I want you to get this idea of voodoo out of your head.”
Try snake handling instead.
I don’t like slumber parties now that I’m in my forties.
Hi, Jehovah’s Monsters. Please take a Watchmonster.
Meanwhile, the monster gang pulled into their safehouse in Columbus, Ohio.
I’d say something, but the guy who dubs me is on break.
Otis of Mayberry had a quiet dignity compared to these guys.
“That means the cells themselves are radiated. But how?”
Um, voodoo, sir?
For the budget honeymooner, try Frank’s Discount Falls.
Is New York closed for the day?
Turns out I had some sodium in my sock drawer.
In a fever of killing, they throw sodium at some passing Girl Scouts.
End more. It’s not ending enough.
Love this one. Probably a Top 10 for me as far as dumb movie with great riffing, but add me to the list of ones who didn’t like the Roman Times story. I love the continuity errors at the end as everyone is dashing to the pond and doing stupid things — it’s summer! It’s fall! It’s summer again! It’s winter! I may have missed it in the comments; was there ever a definitive explanation of why the middle-aged teenager, Elaine, is dubbed? Favorite riffs:
I am Marisa Tomei and I am concerned. I am Joan Kennedy and I am also concerned.
all the James Franciscus/Longstreet jokes
Hi, Jehovah’s Monsters. Please take a Watchmonster.
Don’t even know what panties are, yet they feel compelled to raid.
She’s got Dilbert’s boss’s hair.
I just put my finger on what it is that bothers me about Bobo’s post-Planet-Ape self. He got way too hairy. He lost control of his hair, he let the hair play him. Poor dope. Sad, really.
Did “choke a chicken” mean the same thing back then as it does back now? ;-)
Hank was lost. He was really lost.
And extras can be EXPENSIVE, y’know. Having bystanders on the street wouldn’t have helped the movie. Of course, that begs the question of what WOULD, but…
Okay, that comes up several times after this so I’ll say it just this once: Dr. Gavin and Hank didn’t spend a lot of time on defeating the monsters because they’re private citizens and defeating the monsters WASN’T THEIR JOB. Criticize the police instead.
Hey, nobody said they were her *friends*. They might have just been casual acquaintances (explaining why she didn’t think it was important to call). Besides, total non-shock can be a form of shock in itself.
Probably just trying to impress the cops.
Remember, there were at least two kinds of monster (the TV report makes a point of clarifying this). The non-hot-doggers can be seen on some of the movie posters.
Why do you CARE? ;-)
“Of all the plot holes to address, they chose the Elaine’s voice plot hole…”
It’s the part she was born to play, baby!
This might be my “desert island” epidode. It’s so dear to me. The movie is the quintessential 50’s, 60’s horror movie. Overacting, goofy looking monster, etc.
There are so many goofy moments here. From the dubbed heroine, to “look Polish”, the two drunks, the flirtatious girls in the car.
It’s just so perfectly Mst3k.
Favorite moment is Mike’s ranting about toenails as Eulabelle.
“He doesn’t even have this many toes! Toenails everywhere!
I also read somewhere that this was one of Stephen King’s favorite movies. That explains alot!
I wouldn’t quite call this one of my “favorites”, but it’s still pretty high on the list. A good, solid episodes with some great moments.
I’ve always wondered why the movie went out of its way to make a point about the monsters not being identical, when in fact they were identical. (Or at least so similar that any difference was unnoticeable.)
As for the goofy design of the monsters, on the one hand I have to give them credit for thinking outside the box a little bit and trying to come up with a look that wasn’t cliche. On the other hand, they either went too far out of the box, or not far enough. Googly-eyes, huge eye bags, and a mouth full of hot dogs just doesn’t cut it.