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Goodbye Sci-Fi

Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy and Bill Corbett reflect on MST3K's final broadcast.

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Episode guide: 907- Hobgoblins

Movie: (1987) Some not-too-bright teens pursue aliens — who make people’s dreams come true, then murder them — who have escaped from confinement.

First shown: 6/27/98
Opening: On the SOL, there’s a rash of unintentional on-turning
Intro: M&tB mistreat Pearl’s new couch, and soon regret it
Host segment 1: Crow presents: “Let’s Talk Women!”
Host segment 2: Bobo calls Crow’s crisis hotline
Host segment 3: Pearl is only briefly fooled by Mike’s cutouts
End: Servo has solved the Rick Sloane problem…or has he?; Pearl expresses her disappointment
Stinger: The hobgoblins enjoy a ride
1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (347 votes, average: 4.65 out of 5)


• Wow. Well, there are bad movies, there are really bad movies, and then there are bad movies like “Hobgoblins.” It’s one of those movies where somebody is sure to say “even the riffing couldn’t save it.” If nothing else, it’s memorable. The riffing is as good as it’s been all season and the segments are all pretty strong, and all that adds up to a great episode.
• Paul, who was doing these a lot at this point, offers thoughts here.
• This episode was included in Rhino’s Mystery Science Theater 3000 Collection, Vol. 8.
• Producer Rick Sloan famously lobbied to get this movie on the show, something that didn’t happen often.
• Sloan revisits the movie in this video.
• The whole “on-turning” thing is brilliant.
• The intro is also a gem. We can’t have nice things.
• Crow, it’s pronounced “cerberus,” not “cerebus.”
• Among the more memorable credit sequences is the opening credit sequence, in which Mike is forced to corral the bots as they understandably attempt to flee the movie.
• In segment one, Mike is reading Dickens’ “Bleak House” as the scene opens, while Tom is reading Richard Scary’s equally gripping “What Do People Do All Day.”
• That’s Beez in the grainy photo Crow shows during segment 1.
• I like that the TV says “Stony.”
• Once funny, now dead references: JFK Jr.; Hunter Thompson.
• I was completely taken in by segment 2. Never saw the twist coming.
• Is my disk defective or does the sound cut out during the door sequence after segment 2?
• Naughty riff: “You’re the expert on that.”
• The run of “parking” riffs just gets funnier and funnier.
• Segment 3 is particularly funny to me because of the the three complete different reactions of Brain Guy, Pearl and Bobo. Reminds me a bit of some comment threads… :roll:
• I wonder if Rick Sloane began to regret offering this movie, after the infamous “interview” at the end of the movie.
• The closing bit is probably the weakest of all the segments, but even that one is pretty funny.
• No roundup this week: Nobody who worked on this movie did any other MSTed movies.
• CreditsWatch: Directed by Mike. After this episode, Mary Jo took then next two episodes off from the writing room–I’m guessing that was so she could head to the coast to do the “Gorgo” segments.
• Fave riff: “Aha! And what brisk witticism will this chappie have to offer?” Honorable mention: “o/` It’s the 80s… do a lotta coke and vote for Ronald Reagan…” o/`”

218 Replies to “Episode guide: 907- Hobgoblins”

  1. This Guy says:

    “So what, now he becomes a Jedi knight? WHY AM I SITTING HERE!?”

    As an addendum and kind of a tangent, I wanted to mention the riff “Why ‘hand grenades’? Are there foot grenades?” It’s a nice jab at one of the main pitfalls of observational humor: the comic attempts to point out something he thinks is ridiculous and nobody could possibly understand why it is that way, when anyone who does a few seconds of research could figure it out. It wouldn’t take your average Google-armed person long to find out that there are grenades used in grenade launchers as well as rocket-propelled grenades. The Simpsons also poked fun at this by having Krusty, who was just beginning to try out modern-style comedy, complain that he couldn’t understand why there are both white pages and yellow pages in the phonebook:

    MARGE: One’s residential, the other is business.
    KRUSTY: (thrown off) Uh… well, what’s next? Blue pages?
    LISA: They have those.
    MARGE: They’re government listings.

    A real-life example, as mentioned by Douglas Adams, was a comic (one of many) who talked about “black box” flight recorders from airplanes and how they were supposed to be near-indestructible, so “Why don’t they just make the plane out of the same stuff?” Delivered, of course, as though the people who design aircraft are drooling morons who never conceived of such an idea. Well, Mr. Comic, that would reduce crashes, but only because the plane would then be too heavy to get off the ground.


  2. JCC says:

    I don’t know whether it’s supposed to be intentionally funny or not, but I can’t help laughing when the badass silent film villain (what’s there to steal?) gingerly/awkwardly hands over the nunchucks to Kevin.


  3. RockyJones says:

    “Ha-ha…we drank your bong water!”


  4. Jane Dobson says:

    “That’s not a woman, that’s David Lee Roth!” Love it.
    This is one of my all-time favorite episodes!


  5. Mr. B(ob) says:

    Hobgoblins is just too tough to watch much even for me, and I can watch Manos repeatedly. The movie is just so bad, so irritating, so annoying, so deliberately horrible, with failed humor, bad acting, bad everything and in no place is it the good kind of bad, it’s just bad. I can only watch this one once in a while. It doesn’t have that fun accidental badness that a lot of movies have like Plan 9 From Outer Space or Robot Monster, it’s just bad bad.

    And in response to the Greydon Clark comments above, he was responsible for Angel’s Revenge as well as Final Justice, but I also can find no evidence that he had anything to do with Hobgoblins.


  6. Chief?McCloud! says:

    TS: “Mike, if I run out of vomit, can I have some of yours?”


  7. MiqelDotCom says:

    I totally love the “accidental on-turning” sketch, it’s in my top 20 funniest host segments, reminds me of the hilarious one where the bots question Joel about the meaning of the “Pina Colada” song. The squirting of juice boxes on the new couch in the opening was funny too. Plus, the cardboard cutout sketch produced the iconic image of the silhouettes used on many of the DVD releases.
    Personally I like this episode even though the movie is annoyingly silly, & I don’t revisit it very often. Good riffing though. I’d give it a solid 4 stars.

    Mike (singing) “It’s the 80’s, do a lotta coke and vote for Ronald Reagan”

    Crow: “It’s a Bonsai Bigfoot”

    “pig sticker?” “”iced chicken?” “Fish Picker!”


  8. The Professor says:

    This comment isn’t about the episode at all. Instead, I’d just like to say that I love to read The Bolem’s wonderful comments every week. Good stuff, sir. :grin:


  9. Chris Lark says:

    Well you KNOW this film is a favorite when you get 107 comments in the first day of its blog posting.

    With that said I think M&TB get a LOT of laughs from “Hobgoblins” but I still didn’t like it as much as I thought I would. I was alive during the 1980’s and even I wouldn’t get THAT nostalgic for a film like that.

    FWIW I think this would be a GREAT double feature with “Pod People.” Basically “Hobgoblins” & P.P. try to mutate hot 1980’s movie trends into one film. With “Pod People” it’s “E.T.” + “Halloween” + some type of vapid teen flick. With “Hobgoblins” it’s just “Gremlins” + a vapid teen flick. I think “Hobgoblins” would also work well with “SoulTaker” and was a little surprised that Shout Factory didn’t put the 2 together on one of their recent DVD box sets.

    This ALSO gives me a great chance to point something out. Most people I know think Robert Palmer actually wrote “I Didn’t Mean To Turn You On.” He did NOT and he didn’t even cover it first either. R & B/Soul singer Cherrelle sang it first and had the hit with it first. Welcome to your own personal On-Turning-Palozza! (courtesy of YouTube:):

    1. Cherrelle’s orig. version –

    2. Robert Palmer’s version –

    3. Mariah Carey’s version –

    Now if anybody here wants to post clips of the Mike & The Bots discussion of “on-turning” or if you’ve got a clip of the Rifftrax on Mariah Carey singing this tune in “Glitter” please do.


  10. Cabbage Patch Elvis says:

    “Ooh! What just crunched?”


  11. Finnias Jones says:

    re. Cherrelle’s orig. version

    I did not know that. Very nice. That video beats Peter Jackson’s bloated “King Kong” by a mile. Breakdancing Kong = awesome. And I’d never heard the extended Robert Palmer version, either. His series of videos with the mannequin/models define the 80’s for me. The Mariah Carey one seems to be glorified karaoke job, as it sounds just like the original, complete with piercing synthesizer stabs and solos.


  12. Finnias Jones says:

    Damn, now I had to go watch the Glitter Rifftrax (Mike and Mary Jo) to find that scene. If you are a Pod People fan you’ll get a kick out of it: as Mariah sings in the recording booth, her producer/boyfriend gives her the “OK” hand symbol. Then Mary Jo says, “It sucks!”


  13. I'm Evil says:

    The prune colored muscle car makes laugh out loud every time. I also liked, “Camaro: The official car of peaked in high school.”

    When I watched this week I, for the first time I noted Daran Norris’ name in the credits as the Club Scum MC (“he looks like a cat clock”). As pointed out above he has carved out a solid career in voice acting and a bit of live action as well. He does a great job with his characters on “The Fairly Odd Parents” (Cosmo, Pa Turner, Joergen von Strangle), which is a favorite of my daughter (and it’s pretty clever).

    After checking on imdb to be certain that this was indeed the same Daran Norris, I looked at the rest of the cast. Again as noted above, Roadrash and Fantasia have been in plenty of stuff. But it really was the four principals who went on to do nothing else; most of the other cast members (even Nick) went on to continue working…and carved out decent careers. Don’t expect to see any of them at the Academy Awards (unless they are “seat fillers”), but given the number of people who completely fail to make it at all, being a working actor in Hollywood is no small feat.

    Rick Sloane also gave some of these folks repeated roles in his other “films.” Most notably six “Vice Academy” movies (which based on the descriptions, appear largely based around the precept of “Police Academy” meets “Showgirls”).

    I’ve largely regarded this as one of the worst films ever made, and a terrific MST episode. Even if one accepts the idea that the movie is played for camp value, it is still a complete and utter failure on that front. Honestly, I feel embarrassed for the actors while I’m watching it. I can only assume Amy did not appear at the reunion out of sheer shame.


  14. Warren says:

    It’s 1980s trash-but having grown up in that decade I can’t hate it. If it was 1990s trash then I’d hate it. I always enjoy this despite the scum and the silly puppets. I wonder how Kevin Murphy felt about the joke ‘imagine getting beating up by a guy named Kevin’. Very bad but I still like to watch it and don’t get tired of it. Lastly-“enough with the Count Chocula music!”


  15. WhereTheFishLives says:

    Favorite riffs: “Pewee Herman, casual wear.” “You should know you’ll have to apply a series of ointments to me regularly.” “Paint my muscle car prune please!” The rake scene would have needed no riffing to be ridiculous. Easily top 3 worst movies ever MST’ed, making it one of the best episodes of all time. Rick Sloane interview is priceless. 5 stars :grin:


  16. John Seavey says:

    I think my favorite riff has to be, “Tell ’em Larraine Newman’s in town.” Just a perfectly-timed, perfectly-executed celebrity look-alike gag.

    Five stars from me. A regular in the rotation–like the best MST3K films, it may be frequently horrendous, but it’s never boring. You are transfixed by the events on-screen like a deer in the headlights. :)


  17. S.C. says:

    Favorite part of this episode (and trust me it’s a hard decision) has to be at the very end of the opening credits.

    “Now we’re going to sit down and watch this movie.”

    *cut to commercial*


    Definitely one of the best episodes ever.

    Oh, and is this where we leave ideas for Weekend Discussion topics? If we haven’t done it already, may I suggest “Most Quotable Lines from MST’ed Movies”? Hobgoblins itself is full of quotable lines, as are countless other MST’ed movies.


  18. Not my favorite episode. The movie knows it’s bad, which is a big no-no for MST3K enjoyment. I was baffled at first by the episode’s popularity, but now I think it’s mostly a generational thing. All the episodes the newer fans rave over – Werewolf, Hobgoblins, Space Mutiny – are newer movies (relatively). I chalk the entire thing up to that.


  19. William B. says:

    “Let me tell ya about our drink specials tonight!”

    “Don’t park in the alley or you’ll get towed!”

    “While I’m up here let me point out the restrooms!”

    LOLZ :mrgreen:


  20. Watch-out-for-Snakes says:

    Wow. I forgot how HILarious Hobgoblins is. Everything about it is great. Great opening segement; “we can’t have nice things” is something I say on a daily/weekly basis. And Crow’s footie pajamas (“You can see my legs!”) are just adorably cute. And the way the Mads introduce the movie, bringing it out in a crate with green glowing inside is totally awesome, reminds me of the old CC days with Dr. F and Frank. Segment 1 is the best, has a retro feel. Crow’s mustache is great. I’m still waiting for proof of women existing myself… I was prepared for segment 2 to suck, but to my surprise, it did not. Bobo is very funny, and a great reveal that he’s actually in love with a chimp. The way Servo casually and unenthusiastically says “Movie sign” at the end of the segment is subtly hilarious. Go back and watch it. Segment 3 is a classic. “Boy, that sure is a bad movie, won’t you?” All in all, strong segments, solid riffing in the theater, and one of the most mind bogglingly bad movies they have ever done. Hobgoblins has just rocketed to the top of my season 9 list, and it might stay there, unless Final Sacrifice has anything to say about it.

    Fave riffs: “You’re listening to old guy radio. O-L-D Radioooo!!”

    “Part of me is laughing. The part of me that hates life.”

    After Fantasia shows up: “It’s Robert Plant!”

    Outdated riff: “He’s found Ben Stein’s money!”

    Even though it’s been said, many times, “It’s the eighties, do a lotta coke and vote for Ronald Reagan!”


  21. Cabbage Patch Elvis says:

    “C’mon, let’s get back out there and wreck another scene.”


  22. ck says:

    Possible future discussions:

    1) Best song in a skit

    2) Worst performance by a “name” actor
    (you can get good odds on a Castaway veteran)

    3) Worst cameo performance
    (you can get good odds on a Castaway veteran)


  23. Seamus says:

    Wampa Joe (@100): “While people may be able to make a case that the Comedy Central years were more consistent overall, I could counter that the Sci-Fi years contained the best episodes of the entire series.”

    Totally agree. The best of the Sci-Fi years blows away most of what they did during their time with CC, in my opinion. For me, the show really started kicking it in Season 7 (their last with CC), and they carried that momentum over into their last three years with Sci-Fi.

    Mike in Portland (@118): “I was baffled at first by the episode’s popularity, but now I think it’s mostly a generational thing. All the episodes the newer fans rave over – Werewolf, Hobgoblins, Space Mutiny – are newer movies (relatively). I chalk the entire thing up to that.”

    The ENTIRE thing, huh? Yeah, we just love the hell out of these garbage movies, as long as they’re fresh. That’s really all it takes to get a five star rating out of us undiscriminating young ‘uns. Was there any hilarious riffing going on during these episodes? I didn’t notice, I was too busy being floored by the technicolor.


  24. Chief?McCloud says:

    @120 “O-L-D….” semi-obscure riff, Harry Chapin’s (RIP) W.O.L.D. used to crackle through my parents STYLUS (you kids out there, ask your folks) & speakers. Harry Chapin was one of there favorites, and now he is one of mine too. Thanks for the memories.


  25. Chief?McCloud! says:

    just can’t type well today…that should have been “their” favorites. :oops:


  26. This Guy says:

    Even if Hobgoblins was meant to be bad, it turned out worse than Sloane or anyone probably intended. He may well have been going for So Bad It’s Good, but he ended up at So Bad It’s Horrible, which makes it fair game under the standard MST3K rules.


  27. thecorman says:

    Sure Rick Sloane is comically incompetant, but is this movie really any less competent than “Castle Of Fu Manchu” or “Double 007”? He seems like just a harmless goofball who wants to make movies, and he obviously knows he sucks at it. George Romero’s a freakin’ icon and “Land of the Dead” was at least as ridiculous as “Hobgoblins” Good Lord, this movie looks like an epic masterpiece compared to “Transformers”


  28. Slartibartfast, maker of Fjords says:

    John Seavy @ 116: “Five stars from me. A regular in the rotation–like the best MST3K films, it may be frequently horrendous, but it’s never boring. You are transfixed by the events on-screen like a deer in the headlights.” Yeah, deer in the headlights. With the same outcome. Wrecked car and dead deer.


  29. Anglagard1 says:

    “Oh no, the car fell off the cliff and turned into a Lincoln.” Or something to that effect.


  30. JeremyR says:

    I’m one of those that thinks riffing works best when the movie is watchable.

    I just didn’t find this movie watchable. It was just, well, unpleasant. (Same reason I don’t like Manos)

    Anyway, I guess the producer did really love MSK3K, because due to the popularity of this episode, he was able to do a sequel.


  31. thedumpster says:

    This episode convinced me to own Volume 8.


  32. Cornjob says:

    Here is what I posted when I came across an anouncement at Amazon that Hobgoblins 2 was going to be made available:

    You have got to be kidding me! The original was almost too bad to turned into an MST3K episode. If this movie is half as bad it should be treated like toxic waste and disposed of as such.


  33. Finnias Jones says:

    I ordered that signed soundtrack from (so maybe I’m an idiot?) but I’ll post here again when I hear those other Fontanelles tunes and watch the original movie, and it’s sequel. BTW, the chorus goes like this:

    kiss kicker
    99 girls 99 boys
    boot licker
    99 reasons to live
    kiss kicker
    99 girls 99 boys
    boot licker
    kiss kicker 99

    and the last time, they sing:
    99 reasons to die


  34. I'm Evil says:

    #127 raises an interesting question: Sure Rick Sloane is comically incompetent, but is this movie really any less competent than “Castle Of Fu Manchu” or “Double 007??

    My answer is “absolutely,” but having thought about this for most of the weekend I am having a hard time quantifying why exactly. I think “Hobgoblins” really just fails and pretty much every front; acting: bad, effects: laughable, dialogue: stilted, locations: unconvincing, action sequences: sleep inducing…I could go on, but you get the idea.

    I’ll bet that this was not an especially well funded movie, and it quite frankly shows. I think something like “Operation Double 007” at least had somewhat of a budget and they sat down and put some thought into how they would shoot the thing. When I watch “Hobgoblins” I just get the sense that it was done without much preparation or thought (you stand over there and be slutty, and you, wear these hideous shorts and mince around…..great, that’s a take). The result of all this carelessness is cinematic ipecac.

    As an aside, I would agree it is certainly possible to make a bad movie with lots of money (insert your favorite turd here–I’m going with “Battlefield Earth”), but would better effects or better actors have turned this into a good film? I’m gonna say no. Might it have made a slightly better movie with more money….I guess. The bottom line for me though, is that “Hobgoblins” is the perfect storm of bad film making.

    And on a separate topic, how does Servo kick?


  35. losingmydignity says:

    I fall in the “this movie it too camp, winks too much at its audience, uh…camp”. In a recent interview, Joel mentioned how important it is to pick a film to riff on that is very very earnest and doesn’t “wink” at its audience. I agree. For that reason Hobgoblins is just a so-so ep.

    There are some funny bits, though, so it’s still a pretty fun watch. Even the movie I kind of enjoy watching. But an intentional train wreck is never as much fun as an intentional one.

    And what the hell is a kiss kicker anyway?


  36. losingmydignity says:

    My grade: B


  37. Needs to go up a shirt size says:

    This is in my top 5. I personally think that the biggest reason this is such a horrible movie is the fact that the characters are all so awful. I mean, disgusting. They even make normally good qualities (chastity, responsibility, etc.) seem somehow bad or demeaning.

    And I’m in the camp that the worse the movie (no matter how bad) the better the show. This is one of the top 3 worst movies they’ve ever done (imo). The only problem I have with this one is that I can’t watch it with my daughters- too many cringe inducing moments.


  38. bobhoncho says:

    Ah, yes. The hilarious riffing, and the lovely Kari French as Pixie. What’s not to love. 5 stars from Bob-o (aka Jimbo).


  39. The Toblerone Effect says:

    People have covered alot about how I feel towards this movie, so I won’t duplicate their words. I just want to say that in spite of the punishment the movie by itself puts upon its viewer, M&tB do a helluva great job with the riffs, and the host segments are classic! Even my wife – who’s not a huge fan of the show but puts up with it because she loves me – laughed at several jokes. The fact that it was an obvious knock-off of Gremlins helped, too.


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  41. Sillstaw says:

    Last year, a website called the Agony Booth did an interview with Rick Sloane. He admitted that he thought it was an honor to be mocked on MST3k, and says that the jokes about him didn’t affect him because he’s learned not to take himself too seriously.



  42. Riotsword says:

    It was funny; the first time I saw this episode I really started to feel like the Bots during the opening credit sequence about midway into it. It just felt to me like the riffing couldn’t keep up with the horrible dragging-down effect the movie was having on me. The damn rake-fight scene gave me a serious douche chill and I almost stopped watching it then and there. But thankfully, the episode really picked up when the Hobgoblins appeared (four hours in!).

    Crow’s sudden verbal ejaculation of “Robert Plant!” when Fantazia appears on screen in hideous form-fitting spandex nearly made me fall out of my chair with laughter, and the entire Club Scum sequence and the riffs therein really paid off after sitting through the first half-hour of the movie.

    After repeat viewings, I can really say with confidence that this is one of my top-ten episodes. I give this episode 4-and-a-half rakes out of five.


  43. Dan in WI says:

    So Rick Sloan lobbied to get this movie on MST. Clearly he belongs to the “there is no such thing as bad publicity” school of thought. But I am a bit surprised the Brains took it on. They’ve said so many times that a movie “winking at the audience” typically is not good riffing fodder and I believe this film falls in that category.

    The menu screen on the Rhino DVD clearly shows Joel’s silhouette.

    The way Mike and the Bots can so easily turn each other on is really creeping me out.

    I really like opening segment where Mike and the Bots earn a movie this especially bad. Pearl really sells how bad this one is going to be. First she puts on the industrial strength rubber gloves while Brain Guy and Bobo carry in a large dark crate. Then when they set down the crate Bobo runs up to the camera specifically to utter a scream of terror before returning to the crate to open it is seriously classic. Finally the green radioactive glow from within the crate tells us this time Pearl is series. Cap it all off with one more terrified scream from Bobo while (from the background) peeking up over the movie reel Pearl is holding the foreground. I love this set up.

    Well Crow’s report has convinced me that there is no such thing as women.

    This film was amazingly similar in overall quality to Birdemic. (Especially the parking scenes.) Think about that won’t you?

    Favorite Riffs:
    Commenting on the old security guard: Tom “Is this coach’s brother here?” [RIP Nick Collasanto]

    Crow about the young security guard: “I wonder if he knows his face looks like that.”

    Tom about the prospects for this film “Mike if I run out of vomit could I use some of yours?”

    Tom Barlett’s credit appears: Crow “Ah the king of the Wisconsin Dells finally gets a movie.”

    Daphne “You know what a man wants when he’s been away for two months.” Nick fails to make what should be a lewd body gesture. Mike “Belly dancing lessons?!?”


  44. BIG61AL says:

    oh my, this movie hurts my brain…


  45. Obviously, this one is my favorite. Kyle looks almost exactly like a guy I dated in high school, a guy that really ended up breaking my heart. Yes, I got dumped by a skinny, thin-haired little weasel. Guess it was for the best; now I’m engaged to a guy who bought me a fully-functional Tom Servo puppet. But I digress….

    Rick Sloane & I used to email each other occasionally. He’s very sweet and earnest, and Vice Academy is a surprisingly clever little film. I believe Netflix has exactly one copy of it.

    I love The Fontanelles. Love them. I too bought the “soundtrack” and yes, it’s signed. “Love-Me-Nots” is my favorite track, although “Shoo Fly” is pretty great too.

    I went to grad school with a dorky kid who’s name I could never pronounce. We ended up calling him “Pig Liquor” behind his back.


  46. Sitting Duck says:

    Hobgoblins fails the Bechdel Test. The conversations between Amy and Daphne are about Nick.

    Mike reads Dickens while Tom reads Richard Scarry (who I didn’t care for even as a kid).

    Crow’s documentary on women was hilarious. Brings to mind Ethan of Athos by Lois McMaster Bujold.

    I’m a bit surprised that, when Mike riffed, “I’m surprised he didn’t ask me about my grandchildren,” he didn’t follow up with, “Oh right, I don’t have any.”

    Bobo calling the hotline was another strong host segment, especially when he reveals who he was actually talking about.

    Did anyone bother counting to see if Servo’s parking count tally was correct?

    Also, did anyone else think that the Club Scum MC sounded like Bill doing his Brain Guy voice?

    Suddenly, Roadhouse isn’t Crow’s favorite movie.

    For the record, the song Mike and the Bots had trouble identifying was called Kiss Kicker.

    @ #99: There was also the time in Hamlet where Brain Guy is the only one to recognize that three card monte is a scam.

    Favorite riffs:

    I just want to measure and see if you’ll fit in the incinerator.

    These honor system banks are just never going to make it.

    Mike, if I run out of vomit, can I have some of yours?

    He tried to crowd surf, but no one wanted to touch him.

    These are the stairs. Stairs are your hips’ worst enemies.

    You know, I’d switch to the weed whacker at this point.

    I just want to be brave for my horrible, frigid, non-supportive girlfriend.

    I’m gonna break into Jack Benny’s piggy bank.

    Here, try some pole dancing.

    Luckily, all I wanted was a good thermos.

    You and your stupid thoughtfulness can go to hell.

    When threatened, she gains the strength of a thousand trollops.

    Oh, Nick’s in the French army.

    This is a really well though out make-out spot. They must get public funding or something.

    Can you catch a venereal disease from a movie?

    She’s the kind of girl you bring home to meet Mother, if Mother is a cigarettey retired hooker.

    If this is your God, you have a severe ontological crisis.

    When does the poetry slam start?

    Nick is a smoking husk right now. He won’t mind if we take his van.

    I just blew up the studio accountant for no reason.


  47. Sitting Duck says:

    Sloan revisits the movie in this video.

    His essay in In the Peanut Gallery was also one of the few bright spots among the mass of pretentious twaddle by tenured academics who only exist to provide easy courses for the athletic scholarships (I’m afraid In the Peanut Gallery mostly left me cold).

    I like that the TV says “Stony.”

    It also said that during Where O Werewolf a few episodes back.


  48. Zebulon PIke says:

    One of the best episodes in the series – below average movie but highest quality riffing. My favorites:

    “Oh the dangerous loner model home.”
    “How do you read a record?”
    “Oh so he’s in the French Army.”
    “There, you see, the hose out-acted him.”
    “After watching this scene, I think we are fully qualified security guards.”

    Trying to flashback to the 50s by putting an old car in the shot, but having the actor hold a pamphlet from the director’s last film was a give-away.

    So many others.


  49. MSTie says:

    This seems to be one of those “love it or hate it” episodes and I love it. It makes fun of so much of what I hated about the ’80s. Yes, the movie itself is bad-bad, even bad-bad-bad, and it’s such a pitiful attempt to rip off “Gremlins,” but the riffed version is in my top ten MST3Ks.

    “Club Scum” has entered my lexicon to mean any really ugly, cheap, tacky nightclub. Thanks, Mr. Screenwriter!

    Also thanks to Sitting Duck for giving us the Bechdel Test results on this movie, a concept I find fascinating and usually depressing.


  50. snowdog says:

    *Rolls eyes* “I go ALL THE WAY on the FIRST DATE!”

    I’ve said it elsewhere: this movie is nowhere near as bad some of the other MSTed films. Extremely cheesy? Sure. Cheaply made? You bet! But once I get past the over-long scenes with the old man and the warehouse, the movie doesn’t bore me to death like, say, “Monster A Go-Go” or “Beast from Yucca Flats”.

    On this round of watching, I did notice that almost the entire dialogue of the movie is characters bickering at each other. Why do they hang together?


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