Movie: (1984) A Texas sheriff winds up on the island of Malta in pursuit of the criminal that killed his partner.
First shown: June 20, 1999
Opening: Tom considers the unexplored implications of the song “Owner of a Lonely Heart”
Intro: M&tB are plagued by Yes orchestra hits; Pearl encourages humor in the workplace
Host segment 1: M&tB demonstrate to Pearl how repeating the same sequence can be annoying
Host segment 2: Crow and Tom encounter cute little Goosio. It doesn’t go well
Host segment 3: Crow’s report on Malta includes a good deal of slander on the subject of Maltese men
End: Having suffered through a really bad Joe Don Baker movie, Mike assumes it’s his turn to escape. He’s wrong, the poor dope. Meanwhile, Funny Dress-Up Day at Castle Forrester takes a horrifying turn
Stinger: “Yew think yew kin take me? Go ‘head on. It’s yer move”
(324 votes, average: 4.30 out of 5)
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• I have to put this one in the fair-to-good column. Unfortunately, there’s no way to avoid a comparison between this ep and the “Mitchell,” episode and unfortunately this one doesn’t measure up to that classic. The riffing definitely has its moments, but they have trouble sustaining a constant level of funny. The movie itself is serviceable and certainly Joe Don’s character is a bit less gross than it was in “Mitchell,” but it’s also a bit less unintentionally zany. In addition, the segments are more miss than hit this time around, but the final segments save the day.
• Mike’s thoughts are here.
• This episode is included in Shout’s Mystery Science Theater 3000 Collection: Vol XIV.
• Callback: “Stop drinking baby oil!”
• The opening features more Yes bashing. My theory: The only way you could be this anti-Yes is by having BEEN a Yes fan at some point and since repented. I’m looking in Kevin’s direction.
• Last time I said I didn’t understand the riff: “Let’s talk loudly about our SUVs.” Commenters explained it to me.
• Segment 1 seems a little picky to me, like they couldn’t find anything else to comment on. The footage reuse is pretty mild compared to similar instances in other movies. All in all, I can’t get behind the premise.
• Segment 2 is a bit better, and it explains why Mike takes the time to pointedly refer to Goosio by name during the riffing–he was setting up this bit.
• Of course that’s Mike as the voice of Goosio; Patrick was doing the rather elaborate “technical puppetry.”
• Mike has the broken Goosio in the theater following the segment
• Obscure reference: Perini Scleroso (a hilarious character invented by SCTV’s Andrea Martin).
• Mike, apparently still channeling Joel after his visit, does a very Joelesque bit in the theater when he stands up and appears to be running from the car in the movie.
• Again, I find it amusing that microbrewery aficionado Mike is seen drinking Bud.
• Also in the theater, Servo twice leaps off his theater seat when somebody says “Geronimo.”
• Segment 3 goes back to the “pointlessly bash a nationality” thing they’ve had some success with in the past, but I don’t think this works as well this time. Also: Mike knows how to rewire Crow?
• Then-still-slightly current reference: “Christian Slater’s gonna fly tomorrow I better get this back to him.” For those who’ve forgotten, Slater stupidly showed up at JFK airport in December 1994 with a gun in his carry-on and was arrested.
• Yet another fun closing credits bit, as Crow and Tom come up with new gluttonous lyrics for the theme music.
• Nice moment at the end of the last theater segment as Mike leaves early and Tom has to figure a way out of the theater by himself. “What do I do??” He runs left as Cambot pulls away. Somehow he manages.
• The final bit, of course, is the best of the episode and brings the entire episode up from fair to good. A lot of nice little touches in a great parody of Joel’s farewell. One small nitpick, though: “…an escape pod SHE hid…”?? Gypsy did not hide the escape pod in the box of hamdingers. I remember immediately after this episode first aired there was a long nerdy Comic Book Guyesque discussion of this goof on most of the web forums.
• As if the ending bit on the SOL wasn’t funny enough, that bit is further topped by the appearance of Bill’s in full leatherboy regalia. Classic.
• Cast and crew roundup: Executive producer Louis George had the same job on “Angels Revenge,” as did producer/director/screenwriter Greydon Clark. In front of the camera, Joe Don Baker, of course, starred in “Mitchell.” Bill McKinney also appeared in “Master Ninja I.”
• CreditsWatch: Directed by Kevin.
• Fave riff: “The last thing a sausage sees.” Honorable mention: “I’m glad we skipped the cavity search.”
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Great. Now I’ll have THIS stuck in my head all week. THANKS A LOT!!! :-P
[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2BysG97B5YM&w=420&h=315%5D
I actually like this episode a lot and it’s my go-to episode (sometimes) when I’m on the treadmill. The riffing is good (especially during the Elaine Bennice (sp?) scenes). And I do enjoy the host segments a lot. I can’t listen to that YES song without thinking of this episode now. Also, a long time ago, the original version was shown on a local station (GTW 48. I miss that channel. :cry: ).
I completely agree with #149’s assessment of Greydon Clark’s interview. I was surprised that Clark didn’t mind MST3K ripping his movie to shreds, but that he thought it was actually a good movie! Was he smoking something before SHOUT! interviewed him??
BTW, it it just me, or does Joe Don Baker look like Ron White’s long lost brother? :shock:
Would or could someone explain the flow of time going on in this movie. from what i initially understand Jo Don is supposed to get on a flight in 24 hours. granted some of the Maltese are hard for me to follow, that was what i heard. but at least what seems like a week later he’s STILL got 24 hours until his NEXT FLIGHT! if this has been discussed already i apologize. too lazy and whatever to read all the posts. if indeed Jo Don terrorized the Maltese men for 24 hours, then he is one guy who knows how to pack alot into his…um… day. stay away from the food jokes…must stay away…Jo Don maybe be reading….
or i guess i could ask… if Geronimo is a hobo on a train leaving Malta at 3pm, meanwhile Mitchell! is a hobo on a train leaving LA at 8am. both trains are travelling at each other at 45 mph. with these facts when will Mitchell! 2 be made?
I find that Joe Don is ripping off the whole McCloud image none too well. The whole western sheriff outfit is over done and makes him look more like a rodeo clown than a law officer. The only thing missing is horse. At least there no baby oil in this film!
I think this episode was hilarious and one of the best of the Sci-Fi run, admittedly I am not a big fan of the Sci-Fi years overall. Crow ripping on Malta for no apparent reason was endlessly hilarious to me and I guess I’m mean but I love all the jokes ripping on Joe Don Baker. I loved that the movie obviously was trying to make ‘Go head on, it’s your move’ some kind of catch phrase but it’s really not very catchy at all, plus the way Baker slurs it half the time makes the whole thing even funnier to me.
Not my favorite episode, for the reasons I mentioned in this past weekend’s discussion topic: “… their treatment of Baker in ‘Final Justice’ was too personal and excessive. They evidently wanted so badly to recapture the magic of ‘Mitchell’ that they strained too hard and ended up making it into a long Joe Don Baker bash-fest. Someone watching the show out of context would wonder if Baker ran over Mike’s dog or something.”
The last time I watched it, though, I was favorably impressed by Helena Abella, the actress who plays the Maltese policewoman Maria. I wondered why she hadn’t appeared in any other movies, and after some quick research, I learned that she has definitely moved on to bigger things: she is now Helena Dalli, Minister for Social Dialogue, Consumer Affairs and Civil Liberties in the Maltese Parliament:
http://www.parlament.mt/dalli-helena
If we must compare the two, I like Final Justice a lot more than Mitchell. Both as movies, and for the riffing/host segments. It’s not a Joel vs Mike thing, either. FJ is just a much goofier movie than Mitchell. Plus, Joe Don leaves his clothes on for the entirety of FJ. And he gets knocked out… A LOT.
Speaking of his clothes, I don’t think he actually wore the exact same outfit the whole movie. I’m sure he’s just got a closet FULL of that exact same outfit.
I also think M&TB were overly harsh on Joe Don’s weight. He’s not THAT big. In fact, even by late 90s standards, he’s only somewhat above average weight. I see people that are almost too large to go through a door nearly every day at the library. Admittedly, the guy couldn’t out-act a boat, so he deserves all the riffs he gets in that regard.
@152 – I think every time his flight is due to leave, he’s either in jail, in a dungeon, or washed up on another island. They can’t really just let him go after he kills someone, as they’d have to have some sort of investigation.
Anyway, I’d better ruuuuun…..
i’ve always wanted to visit Malta.
I hadn’t noticed the release date until Dan in WI pointed it out. Orwell said nothing of THIS…
From what I understand, the 1980s was the golden age of badly plotted action movies (“Warrior of the Lost World” was released a year before), so, in a way, Mike and the Bots got off easy.
(checking filmography)
Hm, Baker and Clark also collaborated on a 1983 film, the alleged intentional comedy “Joysticks” (wow, Dirty Harry, The Guy From Paper Chase, “Revenge of the Ninja” and “Lone Wolf McQuade” (two among various other action films), AND this; what a year). Per Wikipedia (so, you know), it “guest-featured” Pac-Man (himself a mere three years old at the time) and took thirteen whole days to make. MST3K could just as easily have targeted THAT, so, in a way, Baker and Clark got off easy, too.
#152: but at least what seems like a week later he’s STILL got 24 hours until his NEXT FLIGHT
I think this is where a “Northwest Flights” riff is supposed to come in…
Maybe the mob kept forcing the airline to postpone the flight because Palermo didn’t want Geronimo to escape his wrath (such as it was). Except that Geronimo didn’t *want* to leave because he didn’t want Palermo to escape HIS wrath, so the joke’s on Palermo. ;-)
#154: The only thing missing is horse.
I suppose that would’ve made this movie easier to watch for some people, yes. Me, I’m just high on life (as said in the most monotone voice imaginable).
MIKE IS TRIPPING!!!
I Love Love Love this episode! This one is probably my favorite Season 10 episode. I instantly fell for this episode, and have watched it many, many times since. A great way to start up the end of the series.
“Owner of a Lonely Heart” was a song I rather liked when it came out. I was in my teens and very much into almost anything I heard on MTV. I definitely did not have champagne taste when it came to pop music. It seems like Tom going off on it was a leeeetle bit random, though.
I admire the “Mike’s tripping!” host segment, especially Pearl’s irritation. And also Brain Guy’s outfit. And Goosio!
As for the movie, hmmm, I guess the constant bashing of Joe Don Baker has aged this episode badly for me over the years. Yes, Geronimo’s outfit and catchphrase are absurd. He doesn’t help my native state of Texas look like a particularly sane place in which to live. But come on, Joe Don really isn’t THAT grotesque. And Geronimo has some qualities that were, well, let’s just say he doesn’t play by the rules, but…he gets results.
#156 That’s terrific! I always did think this actress had a rather dignified air about her.
#159 Well, now I gotta see “Joysticks.” I always did love Pac-Man, although Ms Pac-Man is more fun to play.
I will go ‘head on and give the episodes 3 stars.
The sun is blotted out as Joe Don Baker approaches.
“You son of a – – – -.”
I know it’s hard to NOT compare this episode to Mitchell (a MST classic), but Final Justice really has to be judged on its own merits. With that being said, I find this to be an okay, good-not-great episode.
The riffing really loses steam about halfway through, in fact of all the riffs I posted below, only ONE of them come AFTER Host Segment #2. I think it’s Mike that calls this a “möebius strip of a movie,” which is very accurate. The action seems to start, stop, and start over again and again. How many times does Geronimo get tossed into that jail cell? How many boat chases are there (2) or shootout/standoffs with Geronimo (a lot)??
I think Joe Don Baker gets some undeserved bashing around here sometimes, but yeah, this is not one of his better roles (or movies). The script isn’t very good and Baker seems to lunk his way through the movie. I’m sure he had a good time shooting in Malta, though.
As for the Host Segments:
-I am a fan of YES so the opening bit is one I like. I would imagine somebody on staff is a fan of YES (Kevin?) otherwise they wouldn’t go to all the trouble in ribbing on them (lots of YES jokes over the years, plus Rick Wakeman references). But let’s be clear: no self respecting YES fan likes “Owner of a Lonely Heart.” That song is cheesy.
-Host Segment #1 is okay. Mike tripping is always serviceable, and here we get a buffet of that action.
-HS#2 has the Goosio smashing, which is expected of the Bots, but the twist of them getting upset by it not being something that belonged to Mike (“we try to destroy things that are specifically yours”) is fairly funny.
-HS#3 is another skit about unmercifully bashing a specific thing (person, place, decade), this time being the country of Malta. It works, but I’m going to call diminished returns on this Host Segment tactic.
-Brain Guy in the leather outfit in the Closing Segment is quite the shock, not because he’s gay, but because I thought he didn’t “have a body” and therefore he would be non-sexual. Guess I was wrong. . . .
As for Servo’s claim that Greydon Clark is the producer of Hobgoblins (and that “oh no [they’re] doomed”), that is just false. Completely unfounded (although the “doomed” thing seemed to be fairly accurate) and it makes you wonder how such a grievous error could be made. I mean, IMDb was around back then, so were various movie catalogs (didn’t Frank say he used to refer to Videohound?), so it really makes you wonder why they didn’t fact check that. GASP! You don’t think that with their looming cancellation that they. . just didn’t care. .do you? :shock:
–
RIFFS:
Crow: “The brisket is . . in. . the. . ggah.”
Servo: “Argh. I don’t want to be down here.”
Servo: “Karl, quit playing toll-bridge.”
Servo: “KISS has softened their act.”
Crow: “Man, the Embassy for Malta ROCKS!”
Crow: “Did you dose me, Mike?”
Crow: “High Goon.”
Servo: “The last thing a sausage sees.”
Crow: “His arteries are just looking at each other, shaking their heads.”
Crow: “Day seven of his shirt.”
–
Up to this point, FINAL JUSTICE is my least favorite of Season 10,
we’ll see how Hamlet works out next week (it’s been about 4 years since I’ve watched it).
Overall, I have to give FINAL JUSTICE my first 3 rating of Season 10,
that would be
3 out of 5 SON OF A – – – – -.
:cowboy: :cowboy: :cowboy:
They don’t bash all of Yes’s music. The jokes are entirely focused on a lame pop album Yes put out in the mid-1980s, one so generic it’s known by its CATALOG NUMBER, 90125.
In fact, narrow the target to the first single released from 90125, “Owner of a Lonely Heart.” They mention it by name, and the “Yes orchestra hit” was sampled from that song.
Can’t believe no one mentioned my favorite line…when Mike realizes he’s going nowhere and Tom goes”Come on up honey,we’ll make you some swiss miss”!! Reminds me of my gramma!Hot coco always made things better!!
90125 was originally a Trevor Rabin project, but Jon Anderson liked it so much that he wanted it to be a Yes album.
While it’s not as good as the classic Yes albums, I think it’s good in its own right. Leave It is awesome. I don’t see how it could be considered “generic”.
Okay, so in the seventies, Greydon Clark contribution to the action film genre was (among others) “Angels’ Revenge” (his wife was one of the “Angels,” btw). In the eighties, “Final Justice.” This begs the question:
WHAT ABOUT THE NINETIES?
From the IMDB:
Dark Future (1994*): “In the 21st century, most of mankind has been wiped out by a plague. The few remaining people are forced to live in an underground world, serving as prostitutes and slave to cyborgs that now control them. When the first baby in 30 years is born, a bartender leads a revolt against the part-man, part-machine creatures that seek to capture the baby for their own ends.”
And now you know. :-)
#161: let’s just say he doesn’t play by the rules, but…he gets results
Every now and then I wonder what it would be like for a film to show a cop who doesn’t play by the rules and actually SUFFERS CONSEQUENCES for it. No way anyone was going to make that movie in the eighties, though.
IIRC President Ronald “Eighties Man” Reagan supposedly said the worst thing to hear someone say was “I’m from the government and I’m here to help.” Police officers are, in effect, “from the government,” so and I’ve forgotten what my point was. Oh well.
===
*From out of space comes a runaway planet, hurtling between the Earth and the Moon, unleashing…no, wait, that has nothing to do with anything.
>>>One small nitpick, though: “…an escape pod SHE hid…”?? Gypsy did not hide the escape pod in the box of hamdingers.
Hey, come on, from their perspective, it was over 500 years ago, we’re lucky they remembered it at all. ;-)
Although, really, for all we know, Gypsy originally DID hide it there and forgot about it until Temp-Mike told her about it. I mean, how DID it get there? For that matter, how did the box of Hamdingers get there? How did the crew go so long without noticing the THREE escape pods that were apparently on the ship the whole frickin’ time until the Bots destroyed them in “Space Mutiny”? Where did THOSE come from? But of course, it’s just a show… :-)
“Drink this. It is liquid beef.”
“MMMmmm…Alfredo sauce…”
Checking further, it turns out there was a THIRD film that teamed Clark and Baker (“like Scorcese and DeNiro…”): “Wacko” (1982), a slasher film parody back before slasher film parodies were remotely cool.
from Wikipedia:
“It all started exactly 13 years ago, when Mary Graves’ older sister was murdered on Halloween prom night by a power-mowing maniac. Poor Mary…since then she has experienced horror, sexual frustration, even psychoanalysis, but she still sees little lawnmowers everywhere. But tonight will be different. Tonight, at the new Halloween Prom, all the questions of the past 13 years will be answered as the pumpkin headed killer has returned. But hot on their trail is an obsessed cop (Joe Don Baker) who won’t allow history to repeat itself.”
Yes, Baker yet again plays a cop, Dick Harbinger.
Harbinger…of…well, like I said, a parody.
from IMDB:
the first line, from the killer: “Death to all teenagers who f*ck.”
Well, that sets the stage rather effectively, doesn’t it? ;-)
Let’s not forget about 1982’s “Wacko,” directed by Greydon Clark and starring Joe Don Baker very, very much in full-on Mitchell-mode as the downtrodden cop trying to solve the murders in this “Prom Night” spoof. Rifftrax, are you watching? This is prime real estate for you guys, and will complete the trilogy of JDB riffs!
Track this one down, hardcore MSTies!
*crazy how us MSTies think alike. As I was typing this, the poster above slightly beat me to the punch about “Wacko”!
Let’s not forget about 1982’s “Wacko,” directed by Greydon Clark and starring Joe Don Baker very, very much in full-on Mitchell-mode as the downtrodden cop trying to solve the murders in this “Prom Night” spoof. Rifftrax, are you watching? This is prime real estate for you guys, and will complete the trilogy of JDB riffs!
Track this one down, hardcore MSTies!
@#168:
Here’s how I explain that, for whatever it’s worth: the Mads themselves hid the escape pod in the box of Hamdingers, and loaded the box into the SOL, before they launched Joel into space. It was a precaution in case they had to abort the experiment and evacuate the SOL early (if the SOL developed a problem, for example). Since “nobody likes Hamdingers”, hiding the pod inside the box was their way of preventing Joel from discovering it and escaping prematurely (but of course, Mike read the manuals and spoiled their plans).
As for the escape pods the robots used in Space Mutiny … remember that this was a Sci-Fi episode, taking place after Mike and Tom had returned to the SOL after spending ~500 years as pure energy. Crow says in #801 that other tenants of the SOL had come and gone during those years, so it must have been one of them that brought the new escape pods to the SOL.
Awesome Imaginary Kickstarter Campaign: A “Final Justice” cookbook, featuring all the recipes featured in the closing credits. Who among us wouldn’t love to know how to make a roast wrapped in bacon?
I love mst3k period. mike and or joel. Hell I have the HBO young comedians 8 from 1983! with joel stored on my Dish EHD. But the “saint joel” stuff gets on my nerves. I like the paternal joel eps. But I love the hard edged sci fi eps just a little more. that’s just me, but I would never ever complain about the softer joel era shows.
I already loved this episode before it got to that ending with Mike thinking he was going home but that just put the gravy on it for me. I loved when they did that kind of meta call-back stuff. It was good thinking whoever decided to do it. Mike rambling on about ‘Herbie & the Love Bug’ and the “What if we see a GOOD Joe Don Baker movie?” & “You know thats impossible”, and his poor dejected look… It was all great.
I think they are in peak form in riffing during this season and this is a prime example. The run of great episodes from 1001 Soultaker through 1008 Final Justice was one the best winning streaks of history. (Episodes 810 through 822 may be as good a streak).
Too bad all the momentum died with the next episode. ‘Hamlet’ and ‘It lives by Night’ were the two worst of the season for me, but the final 3 – Spider Island, Squirm & Diabolik were ‘out of the park’ classics in my book so it ended things very well. (Plus there was the bonus ‘Merlin’ afterwards, which I like.)
Wow, you can tell I’m excited for the Pirates to get playing, all my analogies are baseball related.
Nice to know that Geronimo’s indignation at the death of his partner entitled him to go on a killing spree that claimed the lives of several innocents as well as dozens of suspects and risked an international incident that could have led to the dissolution of NATO. I think Geronimo went on to advise George W. Bush on foreign policy.
Sorry guys, can’t comment on this one. Mike’s tripping!
Just kidding, I do have one thing to say. I do agree that “Owner of a Lonely Heart” leaves a little something to be desired. But, while it is not my favourite Yes song (that would be “Roundabout”), I’ll still listen to it if it’s on the radio.
I feel bad for that poor 3 Inch Taxi Cab Driver who had the misfortune of picking up Geronimo and Palermo. He probably would have survived if Geronimo had stayed knocked out and if Palermo/Lovitz/Warhol had gotten their way, but Geronimo mounts a comeback and 3 Inch gets blown up in his cab. Probably had a family too, the poor sap…
@175 – The buzzword for Joel shows isn’t “softer”, it’s “warmer”.
@180
Yeah, when you stop and think about it that’s really the key moment of incompetence from Geronimo in this film. He’s stranded at the airport with a dangerous mob hitman handcuffed to his wrist that he’s got to get to the police for incarceration. So he takes a PUBLIC TAXICAB?!? Why not tell the Customs officers and have them arrange for a police escort? One could argue Geronimo was trying to keep a low profile, but the handcuffs, pearl-handled revolver and Buffalo Bill outfit kind of put the lie to that idea.
Not to mention, if all Lovitz and Warhol’s device did was make a warning light blink on the plane, wouldn’t an inspection of the plane once they landed reveal that nothing was wrong and they could proceed?
From the TV series Angel, “The Girl in Question”:
Italian Demon: “Oh, look, the Americans are relying on violence to solve their problems. What a surprise.”
(Don’t ask me, it just popped into my head. Of course, Angel is Irish and Spike is British, but…)
#176: “What if we see a GOOD Joe Don Baker movie?” & “You know thats impossible”
Well, strictly speaking, that’s because Pearl isn’t going to send them a GOOD movie of any kind, with Joe-Don Baker in it or not. Per the IMDB, Baker’s been in 57 movies (and episodes of 24 TV shows), surely at least a few of them rate a little higher than “bad.” I get the impression that “Walking Tall,” for instance, is supposed to be a FAIRLY good movie, although I can’t prove it.
Actually the first (or one of his first movies) was pretty good, but you really can’t call it a ‘Joe Don Baker movie’, more of a ‘Joe Don Baker was in this movie a little bit’. That would be ‘Cool Hand Luke’.
“Still shaking the bushes boss!”
For the record, these are the good (or great, even) movies that Joe Don Baker has been in:
-Cool Hand Luke (in a small, uncredited role. still, good movie, tho)
-Junior Bonner (directed by Sam Peckinpah)
-Walking Tall (maybe Baker’s most iconic role)
-Charley Varrick (a GREAT movie, directed by Don Siegel)
-The Outfit (with Robert Duvall and Karen Black)
-Fletch (with Chevy Chase!)
-Cape Fear (Scorsese!)
-Reality Bites (oooh, the 90s! Winona!)
-Mars Attacks! (Tim Burton’s last not-terrible film!)
also,
he was in a trio of James Bond movies,
The Living Daylights, Tomorrow Never Dies, and Goldeneye,
although I’ve never seen those so I can’t speak to their quality.
Joe Don Baker was most recently in Mud, from director Jeff Nichols, co-starring Matthew McConaughey, Reese Witherspoon, and Michael Shannon. Mud is a great movie, overlooked from last year. Baker has a small role in the film, not much dialogue, but he strikes quite the presence with just the slightest bit of menace.
So yeah,
Joe Don Baker has made some good movies.
Your mention of Joe Don Baker being in Mud surely comes as no surprise…
Girl in car – “It sounds like something big walking in mud!”
Crow – “Joe Don Baker?”
-Horror of Party Beach, MST3K episode 817
#177: Nice to know that Geronimo’s indignation at the death of his partner entitled him to go on a killing spree
Well, of course. Don’t you know *anything* about “cops who don’t play by the rules but who get results” movies? ;-)
It’s like (checking) Dan in WI said, this is a “Sudden Impact” wannabe kind of movie. Just imagine if Harry Callahan had visited Malta.
Or Rambo.
That said, the movie didn’t really draw me in enough for me to notice how many people T.J. killed (aside from criminals, who, it goes without saying, don’t count in movies like this).
For no compelling reason:
http://www.agonybooth.com/tags/Ed_Harris_s_Tribute_to_Insanely_Cheesy_Action_Movies.aspx
“Invasion Oosa”?
This one launched me on a sort of Malta Internet adventure last March during my vacation. I looked up its page on Wikipedia and saw it on Google Earth. It was…interesting, probably moreso than the movie. In fact there are a number of little volcanic-type islands in the Mediterranean and I eventually looked at them all.
What a said little man I am.
Never fails to get me: “I’ll blow her brains OUT!” “All over THE boat!”.
It’s better when you hear it.
“Please don’t use the guest towels for toilet paper.”
Now let’s look at this!
I hadn’t watched this one since the last time it came up here on the Episode Guide, and I thought it would turn into a slog in the second half. I was surprised though, that despite the repetition this one moved along rather briskly and I enjoyed it. Of course it doesn’t hold a candle to the hilarity of ‘Mitchell’ but I’m always intrigued by movies that appear heavily edited on this show, particularly if it doesn’t look like the Brains had to do all of the edits. Among the muted curses and crossfades, I realized there’s more repeated footage than just the Death of Sheriff Greydon Clark. I can’t tell if it was to cover up a lack of footage or part of the ‘edited for TV’ requirements, but the stripper who Geronimo “protects” seems to have a real lack of variety to her moves…
Fave riffs
Yes, plenty of room for development in – MALTA!
This guy’s taking too long in the phone booth and I gotta pee!
The Streets of San Fran- Malta…
“Look, but…”
Thank you, I will!
Let me guess, he fails again, gets put in jail, the superintendent threatens him, and it’s FUNNY!
So, does that imply that she wasn’t “a genuine actress” in the first place, she was an actual Maltese police liaison who somehow ended up with a part in the film?
***
How can Servo hate cute when he IS cute? Then again, that could help explain the buried sense of self-loathing that Servo occasionally sort of implies. I mean, last season, he set himself up as Canadian and then WHALED on Canadians, what’s THAT about?
I kind of took it for granted that Goosio was indeed a character from Maltese children’s television (wherever there’s television, there’s bound to be children’s television; Xuxa! Xuxa! Xuxa! It’s fun-believable!), yet I can’t find any evidence of his “existence” prior to MST3K. Huh.
So, apparently, the Brains just latched onto a eye-catching parade float and created a backstory for it in order for them to be able to “kill” it? Is that the deal? How utterly…disturbing of them.
Or did I err (again…) and Goosio is indeed the Maltese Big Bird (yeah, if he’d been a giant goose, things would’ve worked out a little differently, huh?!) or something of that sort, he just doesn’t have much of a Google presence, that’s all? Seriously, I’m wondering. Anyone? Anyone? Thanks. :-)
(If Maltese TV created a Goosio show AFTER the Final Justice episode aired, well, the joke’d be on the Brains, wouldn’t it?)
• Fave riff: “The last thing a sausage sees.”
The existence of Sausage Party (2016) give that riff a different context. Part of that riff will never be back. Part of that riff is gone forever…
In Texas? I’d imagine it’s more like a diet of jackalopes…
Because he’s an American and everyone in Europe knows you don’t want America gettin’ up in your business.
I’m bemused by the implication that morality and incompetence are mutually exclusive. ;-)
Mitchell at least had the “benefit” of fitting in with the general tone of his era’s oddball cops. He seemed…approachable, kind of laid back. He’d been mellow, he had. Geronimo, well, even by the standards of HIS era, he was a bit overly grim. IMHO.
Over 80 IMDB credits, he must be doing something right.
Besides, in Texas, I think “as cops we should be judge, jury & executioner” is considered a kind of a moderate sentiment, if not actually leaning to the left. Therefore ACTING!
He’s a mad dog mob hitman who doesn’t play by the rules…
That’s “selfish”? A casual remark? Geez, you’re harsh…
Uh, when dealing with criminals, cops aren’t actually obligated to play fair…
“It’s me, Gino! I been lookin’ for you, ya mook!”
As are the riffs. As are the Brains themselves. IMHO.
That’s the only Yes song I’m personally familiar with, thanks to the weird music video that featured it.
Sounds like a weirded up version of The Children of Men, which was published two years prior. Hmm.
Thankfully, no one actually watched Sausage Party, so we’re safe! I couldn’t make it more than three minutes!
This really should have been the series finale, what with the parody of Joel’s escape and even the movie’s name: “Final Justice”
just seems like a much better pick than the oddity that was Diabolik
Ironic that this popped up in my newsfeed today.. haven’t read it yet but I thought it was mighty fitting.
https://www.newstatesman.com/world/europe/2018/02/malta-island-secrets-and-lies
Gare
Oh, so THAT’S the island of secrets and lies. I thought it was some other island entirely…
“Look, just STOP SINNING, okay?”
“Hit the milk lover!”
“Got his boots from Gateway Computer.”
“Our hero: A murderous oaf who threatens women with coat hangers.”
“Even the dead enjoy Carnival” – one of those riffs that comes out of nowhere and slays me every time.
I can’t get on board with Sampo’s anti-hype on this one. It’s a great episode. I understand not liking the movie, which is kind of repugnant all around, but the gang hits it hard. We agree that the parody of Joel’s last host segment at the end is classic, though. “You do know that you’re sitting in the water heater, don’t you?”
The moral of this movie seems to be that due process is for the birds, but it doesn’t make that point very convincingly. Do we really know the bad guys wouldn’t have been caught had Geronimo just given the Maltese police the opportunity to do their jobs? I’m sure the dead taxi cab driver, the dead prostitute, the deputy who got gagged and bound in the hotel bathroom, and the deputy locked in the jail cell would have liked the chance to find out how things would have unfolded without the sheriff’s constant interference. In the end, you get the feeling the movie places less importance on justice being served than on Maltese Elaine Benes learning the satisfaction of killing her first perp.
This is the last episode with a 1998 copyright date at the end. I suspect the first eight episodes of Season 10 were shot in one block before the Brains broke for a lengthy hiatus at the end of the year. Going by this theory, Final Justice was the last episode they shot before they were formally cancelled in February 1999. They probably resumed production somewhere around then, given that Diabolik was shot in April 1999. I’m guessing it was sometime after the sets were struck, the props auctioned and the crew disbanded that Mallon got the offer from AMC for an eleventh season. Hard to blame the cast for demurring at that point, especially if they had other gigs lined up and if Mallon still insisted on denying all of the performers stake in the company.
So, which Joe Don opus should Jonah be given?
Addition to the cast and crew roundup: Rossano Brazzi also starred in “The Christmas That Almost Wasn’t”.
And part of that riff was later used by Mary Jo in at least one of the CT movies.