Episode: 511- The Gunslinger

Joel: But, Tom, that doesn't explain how John Ireland could go into the attorney's office and suddenly appear on his horse in the street!

Tom: Look, Joel. It's really just a broadened interpretation of quantum linear super-position.

Crow (holding a half-eaten sandwich): Super-buh-huh?

Tom: They simply observe the apparent relative state of a John Ireland in one place while in actuality, he co-existed in the objective vector state, see?

Crow: Uh, I have a theory. The town is a bunch of false fronts and he ran over there real quick.
Joel: Right! I'm with him.

Tom: Guys, why is it so hard to accept the fact that time is not an immutable forward progression, but a factor in a space/time model of relativistic causality and determinism? Huh? Guys? Hello? Jeez, I could tell the cat before these two! Okay, here. I'm gonna demonstrate. Okay, WATCH...ME...CLOSELY! ALLEY OOP!!! (Tom exits to the right of the screen and instantly reenters on the left).

Crow: Hey, wait! Where'd he go?

Joel: I dunno. He just...

Tom: I'm over here, guys!

Crow: Auuuggghh!

Joel: Auuuggghh!

Crow: I HATE when you do that!!!

Joel: But, Servo! That's fantastic! That's amazing!

Tom: It's physics, Joel. Plain and simple. You just exist in one observable region in phased space and then...ZIP!!! (Tom disappears left and reappears screen right, in front of the counter, looking into Cambot), you simply realign your point of origin, you see?

Crow: He does this to me at night. Scares the hell outta me!

Tom: It's easy, guys! A trained chimp could do it. C'mon Joel, try it, it's fun!

Joel: Okay. (Hesitantly) I'm going to...excite a position...of undetermined...origin and region...and...ZOCK! (Nothing happens).

Tom: Nope! Nope! Nope! Nope!

Joel: It didn't really work.

Crow: Well, I'm not doing it. Doing it makes you chubby and stupid, like Tom!

Tom: ZIPPPP! (Tom appears next to Crow again) Say it to my face, Pinbeak!

Crow: Auuggghh! D'oh! Oh, Joel!!!

Tom: ZIPPPP! (Appears back at his normal position next to Joel) You know, I can also warp space and time this way! Watch! (The Gizmonic door closes in front of Joel, Tom and Crow, but Cambot pulls back to reveal the three of them standing in front of the Gizmonic door that just closed, in the positions they were in at the beginning of the sketch. Crow's sandwich is now uneaten.)

Joel: That still doesn't explain how John Ireland is able to go into the attorney's office and...(Joel realizes he's already said this before and makes a strange face as he senses the feeling of deja vu)...end up on the...WHAT THE?!?

Tom: Haha! See what I mean? Hahaha!

Crow: Hey! My sammitch is whole again! Cool!

Joel: We'll be right back.

Tom: No! No! No! No! THEY'LL be right back. WE'LL be right HERE!

Joel: Honey, don't! (Cut)