Song: I Am Sad

Episode: 1002- Girl in Gold Boots

Transcribed by


(Cambot pans up to the window of the ship, where rain appears to be falling. Mike is playing guitar, like the sad-sack Critter in the movie.)

Your limbs are slender, your eyes are blue
Your hair is blonde, your lips, the way they're red
Your skin, your fingers, your ears, your nose
Your touch, your feet....I am sad

(Crow fades in, and we can see a small fire in the background.)

Crow: Uh, Mike, the...uh, water there, it got into a fuse box, there's a small fire, uh, that's ok, we'll get it. (Crow fades out.)
Mike: (singing) Ohhhhhh, I need you so much I fall down and cry...(Crow fades in with a larger fire in the background.)
Crow: Uh, mike, look...I'll wait.
Mike: (still singing) Your smile, your eyes, you're like wine...
Crow: Mike, the fire's a little worse than we thought, it must've gotten into some insulation or something...uh....oh boy....(Crow fades out.)
Mike: I woo many ladies, they are fair ladies all...(Crow fades in, the fire getting bigger)
Crow: Mike, what we need you to do is move out of that part of the ship! (Crow fades out.)
Mike: (Still singing): Raindrops and snowflakes and puppies...(Crow fades in with Servo, both of them charred and a raging fire in the background.)
Crow: Mike would you forget about the raindrops and the puppies and get out?! Life support is failing, decks 3 through 7 are gone, oh my God, SERVO LOOK OUT!!!! (Crow fades out.)
Mike: (oblivious, still singing) I love your eyes, they're like wine, yes wine, I'm so sad, I feel like rain... (Crow fades in, blackened with a lot of smoke in the background.)
Crow: Uh, yeah Mike, we got it. There's still a lot of smoke and water down here, but as far as we know it's out. Look, we're gonna make some nachos, ok? (Crow fades out.)
Mike: (suddenly not oblivious): Nachos?! Be right there! (Mike runs off, the music still plays and he's still....singing?...Commercial sign!) Ohhh, ohh.....oh.....ohhhh.