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Weekend Discussion Thread: MSTed Movie Character Blind Dates

Alert regular Phil asks:

Let’s Play the Dating Game!
Which two characters would you set up on a blind date? MST3K characters and portrayers included.

For me, it’s easy: Batwoman and Ator. Think of the gorgeous babies.

Who would you pick?

94 Replies to “Weekend Discussion Thread: MSTed Movie Character Blind Dates”

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  1. Jim Hardcheese says:

    I’m Number One!

    Anyway, Rosdower and the Potato Eating Girl. You can make booze out of potatoes u know.

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  2. MPSh says:

    Teenage Strangler’s Mikey and Alien from LA’s Wanda! Think of the whiney squeaky-voiced babies!

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  3. trickymutha says:

    Puma man and either one of Mamie Van Dorens characters. They’ll have female offspring that will fly and have inflatables when they plunge into open water.

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  4. Jerry says:

    Kathy Ireland and Torgo. At the very least, he will realize that he can do better than the Master’s Wives.

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  5. Timber says:

    The Master and Beverly Garland’s ‘Gunslinger’ – he won’t die no matter how many times she shoots him…

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  6. Two Bricks Shy of a Load says:

    I’m going Batwoman too, but will am going to match her with a well chaperoned Captain Tom Churchman (Adam West) from Zombie Nightmare. They can be driven by Robin and chaperoned by Rat Fink.

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  7. klisch says:

    Joe Don Baker and Rick Sloan. Once Joe figures out he’s on a gay blind date, he’ll grab his piece (gun) and shoot Rick in the head. No more “Hobgoblins” movies.

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  8. Alex says:

    Ann Margaret from Kitten with a Whip. ;D

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  9. RickHugeLarge says:

    I could see Happy Chef from “I Accuse My Parents” and Jan in the Pan. Nice couple those mugs…

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  10. Green Switch says:

    Harold from The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zombies.

    Valaria from Robot Holocaust.

    It’s the blind date that requires subtitles.

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  11. Fart Bargo says:

    Here’s a few;

    Dr Lorenz (Corpse Vanishes)and June Talbot (Leech Woman) because they have simular interests.

    Max Keller (Naster Ninja) and Valeria (Robot Holocaust) because they speak the same language.

    Pearl and Mitchel because on their mutual interest in baby oil and beer cans.

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  12. Not Merritt Stone says:

    Jan in the Pan and Gideon Drew from The Thing That Couldn’t Die. They would complete each other.

    Einstein from Warrior of the Lost World and The “I love you Davis” computer from Devil Fish.

    Ortega and The Hunchback Fairy. Just because.

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  13. Dark Grandma of Death says:

    The Master and Pearl Forrester; I think Pearl would kick his unpleasant backside, and then maybe get him to buy her a drink.

    I’d also hook up Droppo with the landlady from The Crawling Hand. At least she’d have beer for him.

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  14. Dark Grandma of Death says:

    And #12, Not Merritt Stone…nice!!

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  15. Mikey says:

    Rowsdower and Natalie from Werewolf. He would talk about if there was beer on the sun and she would say ‘This is absolutely fascinating!’

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  16. GizmonicTemp says:

    Since the tension in Cave Dwellers killed me, Ator and Mila. Perhaps not a blind date, but the fact they want each other is the WORST kept secret!

    Stepping across episode boundaries, I think Yuri from Werewolf and Valeria from Robot Holocaust would have a really nice, evil time with some interesting conversation.

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  17. GizmonicTemp says:

    @ Sampo – Children after a blind date? What kind of dates do YOU go on?! :) Anyway, the children would definitely be gifted in the chest area, that’s for sure.

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  18. Steve K says:

    Within an episode, the pantsuit scientist lady and the dopey sheriff from the Giant Spider Invasion. Call me crazy, but they actually seemed to have some chemistry there… what? Really!?

    Between episodes, how about Torgo and the Terror from the Year 5000? Sparkly, giant-kneed, radioactive kids with speech impediments FTW!

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  19. undewoc says:

    Pitch and Mr. B Natural… I’ll get ’em tickets to the Circus on Ice.

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  20. Stupid Repulsive Anteater says:

    Tom Servo and Creepy Girl. Obvious, yes. But he deserves that chance.

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  21. Stupid Repulsive Anteater says:

    Yipe Stripes girl and Chase Winstead. The musical talent would be off the charts! Off the low end, but still…

    The gigantress from “Sky Divers” and Winky. To see if she could actually decimate him while dancing.

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  22. Stickboy says:

    Hugo from Devil Doll and Joanie from Girl in Gold Boots. Over ham and heroine, they can reminisce about the body he lost and the pretty mind she once had.

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  23. Brandon says:

    #20- And if it doesn’t work out between Servo and Creepy Girl, there’s always Servo and Sheila in her underwear.

    Crow T. Robot and Kim Catrall. No brainer.

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  24. Stupid Repulsive Anteater says:

    #23–And if Crow and Kim don’t work out, there’s always Crow and Estelle Winwood.

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  25. Stupid Repulsive Anteater says:

    Derek from “Teenagers From Outer Space” and Natalie from “Werewolf”. Another pair of stunning conversationalists.

    Mrs. Hotchkiss from “The Crawling Hand” and Grandpa from “Teenagers From Outer Space” might actually be a charming couple.

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  26. Cabbage Patch Elvis says:

    How about Torgo and Daphne from Hobgoblins? Who knows? His flirting technique might actually work for her…

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  27. hollyhox says:

    I’m gonna go with Lance Fuller from The She-Creature and Kathy Ireland from Alien from L.A. He can teach her his non-acting method, and she can teach him how to convey “dull surprise.”

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  28. Invasion of the Neptune Man says:

    How about the brunette from Werewolf and any guy from the Hercules movies. They’re not wearing pants anyway.

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  29. Invasion of the Neptune Man says:

    Jan in the Pan and the Thing That Wouldn’t Die. no body issues.

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  30. Insect Man #47 says:

    I’d like Hugh Beaumont’s character, from either Mole People, Lost Continent or Human Duplicators, to date Jana Ryan from Daddy-O, and then try explain himself to June, Wally and the Beav.

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  31. Unga Khan says:

    Our two favorite reptiles, Gamera & The Giant Gila Monster. I predict such a coupling would result in a spinning, flame-throwing dragon that is friend to all children.

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  32. fonyo says:

    Torgo and Ortega. Truly a match made in hell.

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  33. ck says:

    Babs of Spider island and Jake Hays (Little Man) in Gunslingers.

    Speaking of Gunslinger and Beverly Garland…..
    Wonder if there’s anything to this comment, supposedly by Bev,
    about Allison Hayes.
    ============================================================================
    “Review
    Beverly Garland later maintained that Roger Corman regular Allison Hayes broke her arm on purpose during the climactic cat fight in this otherwise standard low-budget oater. “She probably did it to get off this horrible movie,” Garland added. Well, Gunslinger isn’t exactly “horrible” but it isn’t very good either. Usually a persuasive actor, John Ireland seems subdued in contrast to his highly charged leading ladies. Hayes plays a jealous saloon owner, and Garland is the town marshal. The town, incidentally, was on the “Jack Ingram Ranch” located on Mulholland Drive in the Hollywood Hills, a favorite location facility for low-budget movie makers in the 1950s. ~ Hans J. Wollstein, All Movie Guide”

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  34. ck says:

    Oops. Make that Gunslinger (no plural).

    Little Man and Babs’s offspring would presumably be gorgeous
    but continual whiners.

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  35. Criswell says:

    Mitchell & Jan in the Pan – hilarity ensues when he mistakes her for a meatloaf…

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  36. ck says:

    Having checked above matches for the bots and Pearl,

    How about Mike and Kathryn Janeway- he seems to relate
    to the character- in a rather frightening way. (don’t tell Bridget)

    Brain Guy is tough to set up on a date—since he is entirely without
    a body, hmmm. Perhaps he could do an erotic dance to entice…

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  37. Son of Bobo says:

    Nuveena and Mr. B. Natural. What disturbing music they would make.

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  38. Droppo says:

    Max Keller and Ro-man.

    Because. Just because.

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  39. Brandon says:

    I’d pair Eegah up with Mila from “Cave Dwellers”.

    Oh sure, maybe there would be just one-sided conversations, but at least Eegah would someone more like him… in a way…

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  40. hollyhox says:

    We could pair up Johnny Longbow from Track of the Moon Beast and that peasant potato-eating lady from Deathstalker and the Warriors from Hell. Johnny’s stew had chicken, corn, green peppers, chiles, (sigh) onions…but potatoes would really make it pop.

    (Incidentally, before I looked it up just now, I thought he was Johnny Longbone.)

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  41. Not Merritt Stone says:

    Since Outlaw’s Whatney Smith loves blondes so much, I would set him up with Lena from Parts: TCH (post lobotomy).

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  42. hollyhox says:

    We could pair up Johnny Longbow from Track of the Moon Beast and that peasant potato-eating lady from Deathstalker and the Warriors from Hell. Johnny’s stew had chicken, corn, green peppers, chiles, (sigh) onions…but potatoes would really make it pop.

    (Incidentally, before I looked it up just now, I thought he was Johnny Longbone.) I would totally date a guy named Johnny Longbone!

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  43. darthservo says:

    Torgo and Mr. B Natural…Torgo seems to have the spirit of music with him always!

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  44. MSTie says:

    Rider (Big McLargeHuge) from “Space Mutiny” and Natalie from “Wahr-wilf.” They could alternate between making out and screaming like little girls.

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  45. Invasion of the Neptune Man says:

    While she never appeared in a MST movie, Janet Jackson and Crenshaw from Boggy Creek II could have a great time discussing wardrobe malfunctions.

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  46. Invasion of the Neptune Man says:

    How about Sheila in her Elly Mae’s Secret underwear from Projected Man and the title character from Blood Waters of Dr Z. The Sweet Thing meets the Swamp Thing!

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  47. feelingsquishy says:

    Torgo and the title character from the Brute Man…they could go creeping together since they already move at about the same speed.

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  48. CMWaters says:

    Phantom of Krankor and that one talking chicken from “The Chicken of Tomorrow” (the one that said “That’s what you think, big boy.”)

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  49. Fart Bargo says:

    Here’ a group match-up;

    The girls from Party Beach and the guys from the Creeping Terror. Although the girls had a great time dancing in Party Beach, there was no evidence of romance with the guys. As we all know, all the guys in Creeping Terror are more than willing to romance the ladies, even at high noon up at make out point.

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  50. The Toblerone Effect says:

    Even though it was never on MST3K, Allison Hayes from “Attack of the 50-Foot Woman” and Glen Manning from “The Amazing Colossal Man”. Of course, anyone hosting their date should hope for things to not get too amorous between those two, or there might be some hefty property damage!

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