Movie (1973): A sketchy gang of fortune hunters join forces to travel to an exotic island in search of a cache of pearls.
Host: Emily.
Opening: Emily’s bots try ASMR but GPC2 is not helping.
Kinga and Max admire the new “Simulator of Love,” built by lonely Gizmonic Institute worker Emily Connor. Then they strand her there.
Invention exchange: The mads have a toothpaste for hideous plants with teeth. Emily has invented mech hands.
Segment 1: Emily pitches the East Eddie SAT Prep Guide, 70s Dirtbag Edition. Later, Jonah checks in on Emily and she has some criticisms of the lack of show host cooperation.
Segment 2: Crow is the emcee for the game show “Milk & Honey.”
Segment 3: Emily and the bots attend EddieCon.
Close: Emily raps “Mother Crabber,” which features the debut appearance of the smaller and more lightweight GPC 2. Max joins the rapping; Kinga gives it a thumbs down.
Thoughts:
• A couple of lines of the theme song are slightly different in Emily eps. Here’s her version:
TOM
In the not-too-distant future
Next Sunday afternoon
The evil Kinga Forrester
Ran her empire from the moon
Her latest plan was the Gizmoplex
A twisted scheme based on stolen specs
Now she’s pulling the strings from the old Moon base
And she’s back to her experiments with prisoners out in space
KINGA
I’ll send them cheesy movies
The worst motion picture wrecks (la la la)
They’ll have to sit and watch them all
And we’ll stream them at the Gizmoplex! (la la la)
Now keep in mind they can’t control
Where the movies begin or end (la la la)
They’ll have to keep their sanity
With the help of their robot friends
Robot Role Call: Cambot!
Cambot: And, action!
GPC! GPC: Which one?
Tom Servo! Tom: That’s me.
Crooooow!
TOM
If you’re wondering how they eat and breathe
And other science facts (la la la)
Then repeat to yourself, “It’s just a show
I should really just relax!”
ALL
For Mystery Science Theater 3000!
• This episode was made available on April 29, 2022 to Kickstarter backers and on May 8, 2022 to Gizmoplex users.
• This marks the debut of a second cast. In addition to Emily, there are new versions of the bots, Crow (Kelsey Ann Brady; the first female in that role), Conor McGiffin as Tom Servo and Yvonne Freese as GPC.
• What do I think? Well, overall, it’s too early to be sure. My first impression is that Emily seems the most natural, both in the theater and in the host segments. Kelsey Ann seems a little nervous but that may fade as we go on. I’m not ready to write the second cast off. I’d give the episode a B-plus (they get the plus for how wracked with nerves they had to be).
• I used to regularly mention LOTR references when they did them and it’s nice to see they’re still doing it (although LOTR is no longer the boutique reference it once was).
• Stinger: “What happened?” “Some mother crabber set a trap.”
• Callbacks: “Can’t we get beyond Atlantis?” (Laserblast)
“BANG!” (Cry Wilderness) “Hikeeba!” “That was a lot of money back now.”
• Fave riff: “Early Venmo was sweaty.”
• Honorable mention: “I think the horn speaks for all of us.” Also: “Island Tinder” and “Sleazebags, assemble!”
